Dogs grieving other dogs

[NeylasMom]

Just wondering, if you felt like one of your remaining dogs grieved the loss of another dog, how long was it until your dog seemed "normal" again? 

Skye isn't playing as much and is sleeping a lot, she's not anywhere near as reactive as she normally is, she's clingier in some ways, and she just seems mopey a lot of the time. Lots of ways to explain it, but more and more I think she is actually missing Violet. I figure I need to give her at least a few weeks before I really start to worry, but hopefully hearing some of your experiences will be encouraging.

[GreyTzu]

Yes, I have noticed it in the past also.  Years ago, our holistic Vet recommended the homeopathic remedy Ignatius Bean to help.

[Remolacha]

I have never had dogs that were strongly bonded but I definitely noticed when I lost one the remaining dog was subdued. It lasted anywhere from a few days to a few weeks. As long as no one seemed seriously depressed I just gave them time and they went back to being normal. She is probably picking up on your sadness too. 

[Fostr_Mom]

Yes, my dogs have grieved the loss of a pack mate.  I try to do fun things with them to keep them busy at first.  Pre-greyhounds we had 2 cats & 2 dogs.  As the dogs passed and one of the cats, the lone cat was really lost and would circle through the house crying.  She passed shortly afterward.   With the greyhounds, I was fostering so there was less grieving.  

[EllenEveBaz]

Walks with other dogs, or just hanging out with other dogs helped.  Is that an option for Ms Skye?

Of course, what helped the most was bringing another dog home.    In one case, I definitely was not ready emotionally, but a foster opportunity came up and my surviving dog bonded strongly with the foster, so he stayed.    

[cleptogrey]

YES!!!!

all of my dogs have grieved when their partner has died. the only solution was another dog and  then they were happier than ever. and yes, i gave it a long go- 9 months with willie, all he did was stare at the floor and 3 months with felix, he too turned into a lump after annie passed, willie passed, emily passed. so, once they have a bond it needs a substitute. yeah, it's guaranteed foster failure. 

felix and willie both picked out their new partners in crime.

[2greyhoundMINI]

BOTH my hounds and my kitties have grieved over losing one of their buddies. 

Definitely will take time.

I give them lots of extra love and treats to help. 

[greysmom]

Even when you don't think the dogs in the house have bonded, or would even care one way or another if their housemate was gone, they definitely react when it happens.  Just the change in home dynamics will cause a reaction, let alone actually knowing their companion is dead.

We always try harder to keep them occupied with new things after one of ours has passed.  It helps them and it helps us.  {{{hugs}}}

[MaryJane]

For some of my dogs - it was about 6 months. It helped if I took them for walks - usually different places from where I would normally walk dogs.

[dante2zoe]

Zoe grieved so deeply that she was hardly even eating and would just lie around in a very uncharacteristic fashion.  I even had two others at the time, but she lost her favorite.  After 6 weeks, I got another dog.  Fancy really struggled and even after 4 months she was still having a tough time.  Her method of "coping" was to walk and/or jog for hours every day.  It was exhausting and that intense need to keep moving stopped when Paris walked in the door.  

I am so sorry you and Skye are experiencing this - it is tough.  

[NeylasMom]

Thanks all. We are doing extra "stuff" - more hiking (with other dogs when we can), more food puzzles and snuffle mats and the like, more work on her noise issues, and when she seems playful lots of fetch with her favorite stuffie. To be honest, sometimes it's exhausting because there are days when all I want to do is lay on the couch because I'm grieving, but I live alone so it all falls on me. Though she is happy to lay with me and snooze when I do that.

She and Violet were definitely bonded. Their relationship is actually what got me thinking about adopting Skye. Whereas when Zuri died, Skye couldn't have cared less because they just peacefully coexisted at best. I really don't want a second dog anytime soon, for multiple reasons, and Skye has become very dog selective so fostering isn't likely to be a great option. Hopefully she'll adjust with more time, but it really hurts my heart to see her seem off. 

[GreyPoopon]

I try to stay as normal as possible--both my attitude and our routines--so most of the time the dogs barely skip a beat. It has helped that there have always been a few (at least) other dogs in the house. A couple of times, one of the survivors was particularly affected. The flatness can lasted quite some time--weeks or even months--but eventually the dog recovers.

Opal lost her half-sister and former fellow broodie/kennel-mate Ivy in July. I'm not sure she's 100% even now (her situation is complicated by pain and drugs), but she is definitely happier. 

[FiveRoooooers]

I've not had a single since 2003 so no help there. But I can tell you that a dog/s left behind can start to channel the departed dog/s, so perhaps be open to seeing that in Skye. The first time I noticed this it was a bit unsettling but I've come to welcome it and can now thank both parties for their behaviors.

If there is a dog nearby with whom Skye has play-dated and enjoys, maybe an overnight or extended play dates at your place would help?

[DofSweetPotatos]

Yes.   My pups tended to act like rudderless ships for a while.   How long?  Each were different, some were days, some were weeks.    I think once we created a new routine, things slowly began to return for normal for them.  

[lothianjavert]

Yes.  When we lost Diesel both Sebau and Sully grieved.  I tried to keep up with the schedule but also added extra activities and that seemed to help.  When we lost Sully, Sebau seemed to just give up.  She was already very elderly and battling age-related medical issues.  We lost her less than a month after Sully passed.

[kernowdogs]

Dogs certainly grieve for companions.  Last November we lost Jake at 15, a Dalmatian / Jack Russel cross (!) who had come to us as foster when 9 months old - we were his fourth home!  Our other dog Florence, who had come to us as a puppy and was 4 1/2 years old, was lost without her mentor.  Being in the tail end of a lockdown didn't help.  It took us 6 months but we finally found the dog we were looking for and rehomed George, a 3 year old Greyhound (formerly known as Coyote Storm) in May on Florence's 5th birthday.  She enjoys having her toy boy around and is back to her old self.   There is no doubt that the 450 mile round trip to meet and adopt George was well worth it.

I have been lurking here for a couple of weeks, intending to do an intro in the appropriate place.  I'll get round to that 'dreckly'.  For non-British readers, 'dreckly' is a word which can cause problems.  It is a Cornish expression which is sometimes interpreted as meaning 'directly / right away'.  In fact it means 'I'll do it directly I get round to it'.  It could be in 2 minutes or 2 hours or 2 days or 2 weeks / months / years / decades.  It's similar to the Welsh expression 'I'll do it now in a minute".  I daresay that most people have an equivalent expression.

 

[NeylasMom]

10 hours ago, lothianjavert said:

Yes.  When we lost Diesel both Sebau and Sully grieved.  I tried to keep up with the schedule but also added extra activities and that seemed to help.  When we lost Sully, Sebau seemed to just give up.  She was already very elderly and battling age-related medical issues.  We lost her less than a month after Sully passed.

That is so sad about Sebau. Hard to think about all 3 of them being gone. Then again I'm now a Greyhoundless home. Time goes by so quickly.

Kernowdogs, welcome to GT and thanks for responding. Love the boy toy comment. 

Well I was feeling bad thinking yesterday didn't help because I got side effects that knocked me on my butt for the night, but I forgot Skye had a scheduled hike with our trainer friend who I had started paying to hike Skye every other week while I worked since Violet wasn't up for it. We had only started a month ago. She got her out for a really long hike today and Skye has been OUT all day as a result. So we'll just keep up the activities and hope that and time help. We are signed up for a rally class that a friend teaches starting at the end of the month so that will be good. 

So appreciative of all of your responses. It does help to hear about your experiences.