Had to return a greyhound... really torn but don’t want to give up on the breed

[heartbrokenNoob]

We made the decision to return our newly adopted grey back to her adoption kennel today. She’s a petit tuxedo girl. It’s heartbreaking but also such a relief. I’ve been browsing greytalk A LOT in the past week so I figured I’d share my experience and hopefully get some input from people who have gone through something similar. 

We brought home a sweet 2 yo greyhound last Friday. I was concerned when the shelter matched us with such a young hound since I particularly asked for a cat-friendly and low-energy dog to suit my household. But the volunteer at the adoption group convinced me by reassuring me she’s a normal greyhound with low energy who passed her cat test with flying colors.

She was a sweet girl and loved us almost instantly, lots of cuddles and follow me everywhere. However, it appeared that she had lied on her cat test. She was fine for the first two days and would listen to us when we tell her to “leave it”. She’d look away from the kitty during cat training when asked to and showed little interest in other dogs during walks. It all changed when she started getting comfy with us... she’d fixate on the cat and will only look away for a second when asked. She is not food motivated and does not accept treats or respond to verbal cues when excited (ie. on walks or in the same room as cat). We came in this expecting to have to put in work for cat introduction but oh boy we were just not equipped for this cat-workable(?) + super docile timid cat combo as first time grey owners. Our cat is extremely docile and will freeze and run when scared, which doesn’t help the situation. He is also extremely needy and will meow for us loudly from his cat-only rooms upstairs since he’s used to roaming and being able to find humans to hang out when he wants to. The dog also has a lot of separation anxiety and cannot bear people leaving to go hang out where she can’t go, even though she is not left alone.  It is truly heartbreaking to hear my boy crying upstairs for attention while the dog cries downstairs because she can’t tolerate seeing anyone leaves. On top of that she absolutely hates being crated and will paw her muzzle continuously. She also has been actively trying to pry open any and all babygate we set up. She actually succeeded a couple times and got herself stuck on the stair landing since we’re still working on going down. We lived in constant fear she was going to hurt herself falling. We haven’t had a good night sleep since we got her. Our cat sleeps with us and will cry and whine if locked out but the dog refuses being crated and I don’t trust her with just baby gate and muzzle. We tried letting the dog sleep on her own bed next to ours while locking the cat out. He cried all night for us while clawing the door. Two days ago the cat slipped through the babygate without us noticing and the dog lunged at him. Thankfully she was muzzled and we quickly grabbed her leash. I would never forgive myself if my boy was injured.

After a week of not being able to sleep, I’m just not in the right place to help the greyhound acclimate to our house and deal with the usual problems that come with taking a new dog home like house training and separation anxiety. The more she stays with us the more her puppy mischief shows. The adoption group has been understanding but honestly their suggestions for cat introduction will only work on confident cats with no fear. Or maybe we’re just too newb of dog owners to handle all this.

The dog is back at the adoption kennel today. I don’t blame her at all since she is just being a puppy, and I know she is going to make someone very happy as a wonderful pet. But I can’t help but feel a lot of relief and also tremendous guilt that I have failed this dog and traumatized my cat. Has anyone gone through something similar? I don’t want to give up on the breed and I really enjoyed her stay beside all the issues I mentioned. I just don’t know how I can do better and trust the next dog to be the right dog...

Edited July 29, 2021 by heartbrokenNoob
Typo

[Jerilyn]

You did the right thing. Not every dog is the right fit for every house. She'll be adopted into her right family soon. And I'm sure the cat will get over it quickly also.

There are many greyhounds who can live with cats. See the Fencetop and Mary post over in the Remembrance section for an especially great pair. An older dog who has been returned might be a better fit for you. They will know about living in a house already, maybe even with cats, making the transition much easier. 

[RaineysMom]

you did the right thing.  There's never a 100% way to predict how these guys will turn out once in a home since everything's so new.  She just wasn't the right fit for you and thankfully you realized it quickly. 

with 3 of our 5 coming in as bounces from their first home (Rainey, Larry and Zeke), trust me there is the right home for this girl!  It just wasn't yours, and there was no way to know this ahead of time.  

There IS the right hound out for you, perhaps a little older one like Jerilyn suggests, whose personality is a little more known and is more laid back.

sending hugs and thank you for doing the right thing for you, for the pup and for your kitty, too!

[Remolacha]

I will add my voice that you did the right thing to return her, that was the best thing for you, your cat, and for her. She will find the right home, and if you are willing to try again, you can find the right dog. I had five cats when I got my first greyhound  The cats ranged from confident to a true spook. She was an older dog and everyone got along fine, so the right dog is out there.

I also want to add, don’t think you gave up on her too soon. Returning her as soon as it became obvious that she wasn’t working out made it easier on her and your cat.

Good luck!

[FiveRoooooers]

You did the right thing. Thank you for understanding the new pup and while doing the right thing for your household, you absolutely did the right thing for her. She will find her perfect place, and I know that the right dog is out there waiting for you. As Jan above said, when I got my first greyhound I had three cats! Of my 20 greyhounds over several years, only four have been cat-safe.

Don't feel guilty or regretful, you "done good"!! 

[Time4ANap]

You definitely did the right thing and by doing so you avoided a potentially tragic accident involving your cat.  As others have said, she will find a great home soon, and you will find the right hound for your home. Not every dog works out on the first try, and as of now, everyone is safe because you made the right call. 

Let us know when you find that right dog.  You will be amazed at how well they fit in to your house and you will just know when it's the right fit. 

[heartbrokenNoob]

Thank you guys for all the reassurance! She truly is a special girl and I’m sure she will be a terrific pet in the right environment. I talked to a group that was my first choice when I started looking into adopting a greyhound. They’ve opened up their adoption app again recently, and all of their dogs are fostered before adoption. I put in an application and hopefully within 6 months max I’ll be trying to find the right grey for me again  

Edited July 29, 2021 by heartbrokenNoob

[Remolacha]

I think fostering, and having the dog actually living with a cat (or other small animal) is safer than cat tests. As you found out, they can lie on those cat tests 

[LBass]

I'll add my voice to those saying that you did the right thing.  Cat testing for Greyhounds is not an exact science.  I too adopted a "cat safe" hound who was fixated on my beloved cat.  I could not take take the chance on a tragedy and, like you, ended up returning her.  Since that difficult choice, I've had 4 Greyhounds who have been great with our cats.  IMO, the angst of a returned hound is worth the peace of mind for you and worthwhile also because you are giving the hound a chance to find a home where she fits well just as she is.  I hope your adoption group will find just the right hound for your home.  I promise that it is completely possible to have Greyhounds and also feel confident that your cat is safe.

[okslater]

Don't worry about it. Our first grey we adopted straight from the trainers at 18 months. They thought she might be cat safe but weren't sure. We were completely out of our depth but persevered, but it was a full six months before we took all the baby gates down. Our second grey was two and a half when we adopted him from the Greyhound Trust. They had done some rudimentary prey drive tests with a small furry dog, and he was disinterested. When we got him home, we took him straight out for a walk and he was going insane at the squirrels and we thought we'd made a mistake. However, after a week or two he took no interest in the cats at all, once he realised they were part of the pack. Now all four of them, the two greys and two cats, happily lounge around in the same room together. As more experienced greyhound owners, we felt more confident in what to do this time, but also, I think hound 2 took his cue from hound 1, which made it easier. 

Basically, as the others have said, she will find another home, and you can probably find another more laidback dog who takes the home situation more in their stride. You may need to be prepared to go a bit longer than a week or two, though. I think we took it in turns to sleep in the lounge with ours for a month or two when they first came home, as they weren't keen on being crated at all. 

 

[greysmom]

Yes, definitely, all of the above.

And a small adjustment in thinking will help you accept this a bit better.  It sounds like the group you worked with doesn't foster prior to adoption, and that means that however experienced their volunteers, and however much they *think* they know about the individual dogs in their kennels, it's still pretty much a crapshoot as to how any particular dog will react in an actual home situation.  So if you consider that you received a dog and fostered her for a short amount of time, you just increased that dog's chances of finding a placement in a more appropriate home by discovering a lot of information out about her.  You did a good thing, both for the dog and for your family.

Cat testing relies entirely on the people doing the testing, the cat involved, and the dog's head space at the time of the test.  Sometimes it's right, and sometimes it's really wrong!  Dogs can lie and do very frequently!  Plus, the personality of the cat in the home makes a big difference.  If you had a bold cat who hissed and slapped the dog on the snout at the first sign of over interest, you likely would still have the dog - not guaranteed, but likely.  But your cat isn't like that, so you need a *truly* cat tolerant greyhound.  At one point we had five greyhounds and four indoor cats living together, so it's quite possible.  Make sure you discuss your cat's personality with your next adoption rep. 

Speaking of adoption reps, the one who told you a 2 year old would spend a lot of time laying around and being quiet was incredibly wrong!  You can have the occasional laid back puppy, but that's not the norm!!!  Young greyhounds can be as active as any other young dog - it's their prime racing age, after all! - so you might consider an older retiree, or a bounce from a previous home next time.

So wish her well and send her on her way, and look forward to a better fit for your family from your next greyhound!!

[okslater]

Oh yeah. I was going to add, both my greys are very active. One (age 4.5) would literally walk all day, and he goes insane when I put my running clothes on (unless it's raining). The other one (aged 7), demands four walks a day, even if it's raining. I have yet to experience this lazy grey persona! Maybe it's because mine had no racing career, and the other a very short racing career. They're certainly not worn out. 

[heartbrokenNoob]

1 hour ago, greysmom said:

So if you consider that you received a dog and fostered her for a short amount of time, you just increased that dog's chances of finding a placement in a more appropriate home by discovering a lot of information out about her

Thank you! That’s what I’ve been trying to tell myself. We wrote down everything we learned about her and gave the list to the adoption group in hope that she’ll find a more suitable home this time around!

1 hour ago, okslater said:

You may need to be prepared to go a bit longer than a week or two, though.

Hopefully I’ll be able to next time around. Sadly we were just all frazzled from both the cat and the dog crying for us. Her separation anxiety goes beyond not wanting to be alone. She is upset when anyone comes and leaves her area (the living room). I emailed a different group who fosters their hounds first. And I will make sure to discuss our cat’s personality with them. If they decides no hound will quite fit our household, I think I’ll move on from wanting a grey for now!

[Remolacha]

I agree that the personality of the cat makes a big difference. The cats used by kennels for cat testing are, by definition, very used too dogs in general and greyhounds in particular. My second grey came as cat safe because he had been fostered with a cat. (He was 2 yrs old, my only young dog) The cat was used to dogs and took no guff from anyone. So when he came to me, with my confident, “you and what army” cats he was fine. With my spook cat that ran from him, he really, really wanted to chase her, but very quickly, in like less than a week, learned chasing was not allowed.  
One thing that helped my shyer cats adjust was installing a baby gate across the doorway of one room, about a foot above the floor. The cats could run under the gate to get to their safe room and the gate stopped the dog. Now, a really determined cat chaser will either try to crawl under the gate or jump over. That is a dog I personally would not consider to ever be able to live with cats. All my dogs became so used to that room being off limits that they never tried to go in even when the gate was open. 
I am saying all this to help you understand some of the cat/greyhound dynamics, but really, so much depends on the individual animal.

[greysmom]

3 hours ago, heartbrokenNoob said:

If they decide no hound will quite fit our household, I think I’ll move on from wanting a grey for now!

Just FYI, the farther you are away from the areas that still have active racing (basically the southeastern US), the longer you will have to wait.  Here in the NW we haven't had a full haul of US retired racers for more than a year, even without the pandemic.  Our group used to place 150 or 200 dogs a year, and now we'll be lucky to get close to 50.  People who want greyhounds greatly outnumber the available dogs - particularly if you have specific needs like your family.

If you can be patient and flexible about timing, staying on a group's waiting list is probably what you'll need to do.  But there are also a lot of true rescue dogs of every breed that need good committed homes right now.  Whichever you choose, make sure you discuss your more timid cat with whatever adoption agency you decide to adopt from.