This is what I can't seem to recover from, not being with Andy when he went. My little boy went without his mom holding him. I don't know if I'll ever get past it.
You are holding him in your HEART at this very moment. He knows/ understands you better than anybody(maybe even better than you) and knows what you were and were not capable of at that time in your life. I hope someday he sends you a sign to comfort you. He crossed over enveloped and held by your love-physical presence not withstanding. He knew this and he knows he will always be a part of your heart and is eternally loved.