Difficult Situation - Any Way Out?

[WabiSabi]

But did she go to the bathroom?

 

It's just going to take time, and doing things as gently as possible. Which may mean that you wife will go get her, talking gently, while you are out of site.

 

Walk up to her, snap on her leash (even if you don't use it), and bring her just inside the door enough to close it. Take off her leash and gently offer the high value treat she took before. Either in her hand or set it on the floor. Praise her gently. Don't pat her head, one comforting swipe on the side is less scary. Then let her go wherever she wants.

 

I forgot to mention before, she needs to be on a *very* strict schedule - mealtimes and potty times should all happen at exactly the same time every day, and everything surrounding those times needs to happen the same. She will gain confidence from knowing the schedule and how things will happen.

 

Our spook would routinely stay out in the yard, whatever the weather, for hours. The discomfort was nothing compared to the anxiety of coming inside. Plus you have to now overcome the anxiety that's happened to her since she came home. So your wife will probably be on toiletting duty for a while. I would not let her be outside for that long in bad weather though. Monitor her so you know she's gone and then do the coming in routine.

 

Yes she went to the bathroom. Putting on a leash means she digs her heels in and doesn't budge under any circumstances.

 

The daily schedule is consistent with the only variation being the time she decides she wants to go out through the open back door. We cannot influence this.

 

We don't want her to be outside in bad weather either. But the only means of getting her in is by carrying her. She doesn't follow a line of treats/food and she refuses to move when on a leash.

 

I am looking for other ideas on a coming in routine as all of the usual measures (suggested in this thread) have been tried and failed.

ETA: Aha! She has eventually come in following the food although it was in-out-in-out-in.........out-in before we managed to close the door behind her.

 

It appears her comfort preferences are garden mudbath > safe space bed >>>>>>>>> our living area. And our living area comes between the back door to the garden and her bed. She has returned to the back door hoping to be let out again.

 

We've also put a bed in the living area but she ignores this in the few moments that she's actually in the living area.

Edited April 10, 2018 by WabiSabi

[WabiSabi]

And yes, I do realise that if you're sensing our desparation, so is our hound.

[cleptogrey]

lots of good advise here, talk to your adoption group. she may need another dog to shadow. it's not your fault, some dogs need a lead dog. i would do that first and foremost and you should not feel like a failure.

 

there are lots of greyhounds out there, this just might not be the right one. don't fret- it's great that you reached out.

[WabiSabi]

lots of good advise here, talk to your adoption group. she may need another dog to shadow. it's not your fault, some dogs need a lead dog. i would do that first and foremost and you should not feel like a failure.

 

there are lots of greyhounds out there, this just might not be the right one. don't fret- it's great that you reached out.

 

Thank you for your kind words. We are both sat here sobbing at the prospect of her going back. It's probably for the best (for her) though.

[cgs]

Just a thought and probably all wrong, but it seems she didn't like manhandling, so she figured out that she might prefer to go out on her own. If you encourage her back inside, and she doesn't go, maybe picking her up/manhandling would convince her it's best to go on her own before that happens. We had to manhandled Percy to teach him the stairs and he didn't like it and finally did it on his own. As I said, probably totally wrong, but you're looking for different ideas. I'd give her 10 minutes outside, then encourage with treats and try leading with a leash, and when she refuses, carry her in. Do that consistently every time and maybe she'll decide to move on her own.

Edited April 10, 2018 by cgs

[greysmom]

As long as she will let your wife walk up to her and catch her when she's in the garden, then that's what you should do for the time being. It just needs to be low key and as calm as possible so it doesn't increase her anxiety. Yes, she is gping to want to go out because that's were she feels safest - you need to make *some* decisions for her own safety and your own peace of mind. So block off the room where the doorway is unless it's time for her to go out (or otherwise be in the room. If the living room is more of a passageway at this point, that's fine - let her stay in her safe spot with (visitations) as much as she wants.

 

In our case, Cash would not allow herself to be caught by anyone. We had to wait her out until she got tired/hungry enough to stop running. She was leash walked in our yard for the entire 6+ years we had her because her response to everything that scared her was to run away.

 

Don't discount the value of anti anxiety medications. They *can* really help. If your girl had an infection, you wouldn't hesitate to give her antibiotics, and anxiety is a medical condition that can be treated and helped. It may be her brain chemistry is just not right and she'll need to be on something longterm, or it may be that a short course will help her settle in and settle down and help her build trust with her new home.

 

Have you contacted the group you got her from at all before this or was their entire advice about ways to manhandle her? That is my reservation about sending her back - you appear to be dealing with your girl's challenges better than they would be - but you and your wife also need to be on board in dealing with an anxious dog long term. She may be fine if placed in a multidog household, she may not (it didn't make a difference with our spook), but it may be what's best for everyone in this situation.

[WabiSabi]

Thanks to all of you for your suggestions and concern.

 

We must be doing something right. We both got play bows this morning when I let her out for her pre-brekkie constitutional.

 

She took a treat from our hand again too when we were outside.

 

And she came in for brekkie.

[Hubcitypam]

Good Deal. You're getting there. Baby steps.

Edited April 11, 2018 by Hubcitypam

[Hubcitypam]

 

Putting on a leash means she digs her heels in and doesn't budge under any circumstances.

 

My small brain says you have to desensitize the leash. Get a dirt cheap one and cut it off so she can't trip in it and just let here wear it around.for a while.

Great progress today!

[WabiSabi]

My small brain says you have to desensitize the leash. Get a dirt cheap one and cut it off so she can't trip in it and just let here wear it around.for a while.

Great progress today!

 

Great idea, I'll try that. Thanks.

[chocolatehunny]

Were in the UK too.

We adopted a Lurcher almost 8 years ago now and he was scared of everything. He wouldn’t walk either because he was so fragile and scared. He was in a very bad way indeed. He had been hurt by gypsys who used to keep him locked up in a shed.

For us it was just time, and being very gentle with him, calm and making him feel secure. I have to say (I’m not advising you get another dog) but having already got another dog (an ideal teaching dog too, a gentle, calm pack leader) his helped massively.

Also treats like liver and tripe.

 

Milo is scared to this day but only if you aren’t gentle with him. If you’re too noisey (which the kids can be) or go up to him too fast he will back off and Yelp like we beat him up or something. (Which of course we have never done and never would!) but he is so much better.

Time is a healer. There’s a reason she behaves the way she does, probably due to some poor background. If she wasn’t a good racer perhaps she got mistreated because of this I don’t know. She just has to learn you won’t hurt her perhaps? And that takes time.

 

Lisa x

[WabiSabi]

Were in the UK too.

We adopted a Lurcher almost 8 years ago now and he was scared of everything. He wouldn’t walk either because he was so fragile and scared. He was in a very bad way indeed. He had been hurt by gypsys who used to keep him locked up in a shed.

For us it was just time, and being very gentle with him, calm and making him feel secure. I have to say (I’m not advising you get another dog) but having already got another dog (an ideal teaching dog too, a gentle, calm pack leader) his helped massively.

Also treats like liver and tripe.

 

Milo is scared to this day but only if you aren’t gentle with him. If you’re too noisey (which the kids can be) or go up to him too fast he will back off and Yelp like we beat him up or something. (Which of course we have never done and never would!) but he is so much better.

Time is a healer. There’s a reason she behaves the way she does, probably due to some poor background. If she wasn’t a good racer perhaps she got mistreated because of this I don’t know. She just has to learn you won’t hurt her perhaps? And that takes time.

 

Lisa x

 

Very helpful, thank you.

[Hubcitypam]

 

Great idea, I'll try that. Thanks.

...I had the one that was afraid of the leash and in addition to what I suggested great minds on here told me to buy cheap leashes and hang them over counters and door knobs so she saw leashes all around in her daily life. I think it helped.

Edited April 11, 2018 by Hubcitypam

[JohnF]

Leashes and muzzles would have been seen as their 'going-out' things and therefore a 'nice' process.

You have actually made significant progress. To get her to follow happily, try having both of you there, and one holding the leash. The first person says 'come on let's go walkies' in a happy voice and starts to walk. The leash-holder then gently tugs and follows. When it works, the leash-holder can give the dog a high-value treat like a piece of frankfurter. Only use the chosen high value treat for very important things.

 

You didn't say what part of the UK you are in?

 

Perhaps visit the sites of these organisations:

 

 

https://foreverhoundstrust.org/

 

https://www.greyhoundtrust.org.uk/

[XTRAWLD]

I cannot begin to tell you how important it is to have happy tones, happy moods, everything uppity and fun even when its the last thing you want to do. It helps them understand you immensely, they take their lead from you. If you are happy and cheerful, they learn that they can be too and can trust you and let their fur down. Happy happy happy!!! If you have any type of punishing or mad tone in your voice, you will get zero cooperation. With happy, you've got a fighting chance. If she does something you ask successfully, you treat and lavish her like it is the best thing in the world. She took 3 steps in and got into the house? That's worth a 2 minute party!!! Happy happy praise and pets. If you sound upset, she will be really reluctant to do anything or come to you for fear of punishment. And when she does come even after you have been a little harsh or happy, always always reward with pets. You dont want her to associate coming to you and receive something bad, or nothing at all for that matter.

Edited April 11, 2018 by XTRAWLD

[cgs]

Great progress! We've had our boy for 2 months and there were changes every day for the first month and he still changes, but not as much now.

[LBass]

 

We must be doing something right. We both got play bows this morning when I let her out for her pre-brekkie constitutional.

She took a treat from our hand again too when we were outside.

And she came in for brekkie.

 

Progress. What a huge relief! I'm so glad that she's given you a glimmer of hope.

[GeorgeofNE]

Yeah!!!!

 

I read the whole thread first, and I cannot believe how much you've accomplished!!

 

Well done. You seem like a kind soul, and I think this girl needs you.

 

Best wishes for continuing success.

[cgs]

How has the rest of the day been?

[WabiSabi]

Thanks all for your kind words and encouragement.

 

 

How has the rest of the day been?

 

 

Today has been better again. When we're in the garden, she has actually started to come near and present herself for side and back stroking.

 

But only in the garden. In the living area, she appears very uptight until she gets to her den. But her anxiety seems to be lessening there too and whilst she'll avoid us, the gap is narrowing.

 

Returning from the garden to indoors is still a bit hit and miss though. Fortunately, it's still a bit chilly so that gives her a reason to come in at some point.

 

We've decided not to try anything with a leash at the moment whilst we're building her trust like this. In the next week or two, weather permitting, our garden will be getting turfed so we might start trying to just walk her round the garden and we'll turn to the other tactics if that proves a problem.

Edited April 11, 2018 by WabiSabi

[cmc333]

She is trying so hard to fit in. Playbows and taking treats. She is so brave. I remember Gypsy was afraid of windows and we had windows the entire length of the back of the house. She could see reflections in them and that scared her. So we put the blinds down for weeks until she realized what the reflection of the TV was and that the little white dogs in the window weren't really there. Every little step forward made me cry with happiness.

 

Just slow and steady and don't worry if she takes a step or two backwards once in a while. Consistency is a great healer.

[LBass]

That's a wonderful update.

[cleptogrey]

that's a major break thru! our last female was fine on lead, but in the yard(garden as you call it) she used to like down in a submissive position and cower when we called her when she was by herself. she even did that for my 80 some odd year old mother who has great karma with dogs. we needed to get down and hold the collar and bring her back in. she had fear of entering the kitchen by herself as well and it took a couple of years for her to enter the studio in our basement. fortunately she did not have fear of a leash. all of the above was conquered with positive reinforcement. but having a dog to follow did help.

 

give it time, follow pam's suggestion for a short leash/grab leash on her at all times. here is the states they are used quite often in obedience training when a dog is starting to work off lead. they only need to be around 8-10" long(around the length of your foot).

 

keep us posted on your progress! and don't panic if there are set backs.

[GeorgeofNE]

By any chance is your home full of lovely, shiny floors? If so, that might be part of her indoor fear. Make sure you have LOTS of throw rugs on the floor for now. One of the things my first hound NEVER got used to was shiny floors. He acted like they were lava and his legs would burn off if his feet touched them!

[WabiSabi]

You lot are great. Thanks again.

 

By any chance is your home full of lovely, shiny floors? If so, that might be part of her indoor fear. Make sure you have LOTS of throw rugs on the floor for now. One of the things my first hound NEVER got used to was shiny floors. He acted like they were lava and his legs would burn off if his feet touched them!

 

Yes we have oak flooring in the living space and slate tiles in the kitchen BUT there's a path of non-slip mats and carpet remnants in a big loop that she's fine on. We've also ordered better non-slip mats that we'll put down when the mudbath in our yard goes.

 

Here's an interesting thing. She still freaks out in the house if she sets eyes on me but she whines to be let out which I do. She then goes to a specific area in the garden yard and stands and waits for me to crouch or sit down and pet her continuously. She won't let me do this anywhere else in the garden and certainly not indoors.

 

It's obviously an anxiety reducing thing (she stops barking at passers-by when I do this) and I'm guessing the specific spot gives her an escape route that she doesn't think she'll have elsewhere.

 

What makes it even more interesting is that this is now often the sole reason for going out! No toilet, no running around, just get out here WabiSabi and give me some love.

 

Amazing.