Guest Goldsmom Posted July 12, 2010 Share Posted July 12, 2010 (edited) I have been off GT for a while, coming back and reading about all the loss on the Remembrance forum made me realize I had a very unpleasant thing to do! Like all of you I have suffered the same pain. I would like to share with you a real experience I have had this weekend. Maybe, it will be of comfort to someone, suffering the torment of grief. After putting this off for so long, I finally gathered up the cards, notes, photos and papers for my gang that has crossed the bridges. Knowing I needed to organize all this information and photos I finally gathered up the courage to tackle a very painful but necessary task. So I sat on the floor with all the mementos, photos cards, letters and collars. Picking up each photo and remembering where and why it was taken. Thinking about all the goofy things each one had done. And all the little quarks they all had! Remembering, how much joy they gave me and the love I felt when looking into all those eyes. Heidi, the heart of a lion, my protector. Muffin, the little mix breed saved from the pet store, the best $23.00 I ever spent. Petie, Dickie and Thumper my beloved Dobies. Goldie stole my heart the first day. And, Daisy with the curly tail, the foster failure. God! How I miss each one… I saved the collars for last. The collars for every day wear, with fur tangled into the webbing. Goldie always had a black collar and his beautiful almost white fawn fur intermingled with the webbing. Petie and the Boys wore red leather collars. Miss Peties was rolled leather and the Boys were flat carved leather…red of course! Daisy preferred something a little more flashy and diva-ish…..so jacquard ribbon for Miss Spark! Heidi and Muffin just liked simple no fuss leather collars. The collars……….they are like a babies first shoes….I held them, caress them, smell them…..and grieve over them again. And all the old feelings come rushing back. Tears cloud my eyes, my face flushes, my heart pounds in my chest and the anger raged……anger that numbs the soul to anything and everyone. The anger screams…..WHY? Why? Cant I hold them again, love them again, see them again, and have just one more day with them again??? How could you do this to me! WHY? These same questions fall on deaf ears yet again, without an answer. Or so I thought…… Sitting on the floor, surrounded by precious mementos, holding on to each one like it would connect me back to my babies, crying and angry again! I was snapped back into reality with a weight on my shoulder and a hot breath on my face. It was Shadow, and beside her, Wiggles and Jelly. As if on command they all laid down beside me on the floor, sitting very still (which is a switch for The Sisters). When I looked at them something whispered in my ear or to my heart, this is what I heard….they are still her for you to love……and with that the anger subsided….and I hugged and kissed all three of those beautiful faces, and realized how selfish I was being….. If we live in the past it will consume us, we will dimisnish the memory and we will miss out on what is here and now, that we should cherish, love and enjoy each and every moment. I grieve for and love my mixed gang of furry faces, but I will be with them again, all in due time. But, for now I have The Sisters and Shadow who I love beyond words, and will cherish each and every moment I have with them….. Edited July 12, 2010 by Goldsmom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest LadyChester Posted July 12, 2010 Share Posted July 12, 2010 Thank you for sharing this ... how very true. Godspeed to your angels who have crossed the Bridge. Scritches to those still with you Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
grey14me Posted July 12, 2010 Share Posted July 12, 2010 Perfect! Quote Michelle...forever missing her girls, Holly 5/22/99-9/13/10 and Bailey 8/1/93-7/11/05 Religion is the smile on a dog...Edie Brickell Wag more, bark less :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CaliforniaGreys Posted July 12, 2010 Share Posted July 12, 2010 Very well said! And it is because of them, we still go on Quote Missing my little Misty who took a huge piece of my heart with her on 5/2/09, and Ekko, on 6/28/12 For the sick, the lost, and the homeless Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Houndtime Posted July 12, 2010 Share Posted July 12, 2010 (edited) As each one leaves they take a piece of our heart. But, our hearts are big enough to share our love with another (and another). About three weeks ago I had to take Idol to the vet. While removing a bandage, I cut her with the scissor (I felt awful about it). I don't usually wait long at the vet, but I was a squeezed in appointment. Sitting there I started to cry as that was where I brought Brandy and John E to be put to sleep. I said, it is hard to sit here and everyone in the office understood. Edited July 12, 2010 by Houndtime Quote Irene Ullmann w/Flying Odin and Mama Mia in Lower Delaware Angels Brandy, John E, American Idol, Paul, Fuzzy and Shine Handcrafted Greyhound and Custom Clocks http://www.houndtime.com Zoom Doggies-Racing Coats for Racing Greyhounds Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Remolacha Posted July 12, 2010 Share Posted July 12, 2010 Beautifully written and a good reminder to us all Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gazehund Posted July 12, 2010 Share Posted July 12, 2010 (edited) I saw this in the big list Sherry. Very well said and I totally agree. So do Pearl, Pooter and Dodger. Edited July 12, 2010 by gazehund Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Goldsmom Posted July 12, 2010 Share Posted July 12, 2010 As each one leaves they take a piece of our heart. But, our hearts are big enough to share our love with another (and another). About three weeks ago I had to Idol to the vet. While removing a bandage, I cut her with the scissor (I felt awful about it). I don't usually wait long at the vet, but I was a squeezed in appointment. Sitting there I started to cry as that was where I brought Brandy and John E to be put to sleep. I said, it is hard to sit here and everyone in the office understood. The vets office holds many happy and sad memories for us all....just open your heart to all the good ones! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batmom Posted July 12, 2010 Share Posted July 12, 2010 What a beautiful thing Shadow and the Sisters did for you, and for all of us. Wise words, Sherry. Wise words. Quote Star aka Starz Ovation (Ronco x Oneco Maggie*, litter #48538), Coco aka Low Key (Kiowa Mon Manny x Party Hardy, litter # 59881), and mom in IllinoisWe miss Reko Batman (Trouper Zeke x Marque Louisiana), 11/15/95-6/29/06, Rocco the thistledown whippet, 04/29/93-10/14/08, Reko Zema (Mo Kick x Reko Princess), 8/16/98-4/18/10, the most beautiful girl in the whole USA, my good egg Joseph aka Won by a Nose (Oneco Cufflink x Buy Back), 09/22/2003-03/01/2013, and our gentle sweet Gidget (Digitizer, Dodgem by Design x Sobe Mulberry), 1/29/2006-11/22/2014, gone much too soon. Never forgetting CJC's Buckshot, 1/2/07-10/25/10. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Goldsmom Posted July 13, 2010 Share Posted July 13, 2010 What a beautiful thing Shadow and the Sisters did for you, and for all of us. Wise words, Sherry. Wise words. Thanks!...they are my rocks..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Gingergrey Posted July 13, 2010 Share Posted July 13, 2010 Amazing and beautiful! Thanks for sharing your thoughts and your grief. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NeylasMom Posted July 13, 2010 Share Posted July 13, 2010 Your words clearly come from the heart. It's a good reminder to all of us, even those who don't yet know your loss, but who will eventually. Thank you for sharing that. Quote Jen, CPDT-KA with Zuri, lab in a greyhound suit, Violet, formerly known as Faith, Skye, the permanent puppy, Cisco, resident cat, and my baby girl Neyla, forever in my heart "The great thing about science is that you're free to disagree with it, but you'll be wrong." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest GreysAndMoreGreys Posted July 14, 2010 Share Posted July 14, 2010 Truly beautiful. Sometimes we just want to feel selfish and wallow in our pain and sadness. Good things we have these other dogs around to snap us out of it and thanks for mentioning about hugging and smelling their collars. I don't feel so alone now Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Goldsmom Posted July 14, 2010 Share Posted July 14, 2010 Truly beautiful. Sometimes we just want to feel selfish and wallow in our pain and sadness. Good things we have these other dogs around to snap us out of it and thanks for mentioning about hugging and smelling their collars. I don't feel so alone now Your not alone in your feelings....you have a lot of company in this group. Very few of us indeed have escaped the passing of a beloved furry friend and family member. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
racindog Posted July 14, 2010 Share Posted July 14, 2010 What a beautiful thing Shadow and the Sisters did for you, and for all of us. Wise words, Sherry. Wise words. Breathtaking-how wise and loving they are. Like Batmom said 'wise words.' The heart knows what the mind cannot understand sometimes. The ones who have crossed over will indeed be with you always. Thank you for sharing. It is written so beautifully. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rycezmom Posted July 14, 2010 Share Posted July 14, 2010 I always knew you understood this. Thanks to you, I see Jim every time I walk into the family room. He sits center on the hound wall. I know that Millie will be next to take her place on the wall. Thanks for reminding us what we sometimes forget... Thanks again for Jim.. And for knowing. L. Quote The more I see of man, the more I like dogs. ~Mme. de Staël Missing my Bridge Angels Ryce, Bo, Jim, Miss Millie, Miss Rose, Gustopher P Jones (Pimpmaster G), Miss Isabella and Miss Star Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Energy11 Posted July 14, 2010 Share Posted July 14, 2010 Most beautifully said ... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Goldsmom Posted July 15, 2010 Share Posted July 15, 2010 (edited) You all are going to make me cary again!.... ....What is so amazing is that we "ALL" know the same pain...but deal with it is such differnt ways.... I have been truly blessed to know each and care for every one of my gang and all of you....I guess we aren't supposed to have all the answers just yet, But! someday we will have it all explained. And "they" will all be waiting for us when we make the journey to the beautiful place on the other side of the bridge.... Edited July 16, 2010 by Goldsmom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest jettcricket Posted July 15, 2010 Share Posted July 15, 2010 Losing both Jett and Cricket has been the hardest loss that I've ever experienced and I've had many a pet. A friend of mine told me, "Lin...we don't replace our pets, but by adopting another it's an extension of our love for the breed". She was spot on...no doubt I will always carry a very special place in my heart for Jett and Cricket, but having my 3 babies does help so much and I know my grey angels would not want me to grieve, but to love again. Thank you so much for sharing..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest jettcricket Posted July 15, 2010 Share Posted July 15, 2010 As each one leaves they take a piece of our heart. But, our hearts are big enough to share our love with another (and another). About three weeks ago I had to take Idol to the vet. While removing a bandage, I cut her with the scissor (I felt awful about it). I don't usually wait long at the vet, but I was a squeezed in appointment. Sitting there I started to cry as that was where I brought Brandy and John E to be put to sleep. I said, it is hard to sit here and everyone in the office understood. Irene...I can so relate. After losing Jett I had to bring in a foster for an x-ray. They went to put me in the same room where Jett was PTS and it had only been a few days after losing him. I told them, I can't go in there and they totally understood. It is so very hard...for me it was like losing a child. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest dmona Posted July 15, 2010 Share Posted July 15, 2010 Sherry, this is so beautiful, even though it made my eyes sweat. It really helped me as I lost my sweet Kelsey June 4. I got a foster the other day and sort of felt guilty but after reading your post, I feel better. They are all so special and different and deserve to have a good home. So, like you said we need to have our memories of each one and go on to the next one for the present time. Thanks for sharing. Dianne Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Goldsmom Posted July 16, 2010 Share Posted July 16, 2010 Losing both Jett and Cricket has been the hardest loss that I've ever experienced and I've had many a pet. A friend of mine told me, "Lin...we don't replace our pets, but by adopting another it's an extension of our love for the breed". She was spot on...no doubt I will always carry a very special place in my heart for Jett and Cricket, but having my 3 babies does help so much and I know my grey angels would not want me to grieve, but to love again. Thank you so much for sharing..... your friend is right about not replacing our pets....that would be an injustice to those who have passed...and we would miss what the new babies have to say.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jackandgrey Posted July 16, 2010 Share Posted July 16, 2010 Beautiful words and so wise. I truly take such joy in the memory of my boy. Although I would give anything to have my Jack with me again, I could not ever do him the disservice of darkening his memory with prolonged grief and unhappiness. Thanks for your post. Quote Susan, Jessie and Jordy NORTHERN SKY GREYHOUND ADOPTION ASSOCIATION Jack, in my heart forever March 1999-Nov 21, 2008 My Dancing Queen Jilly with me always and forever Aug 12, 2003-Oct 15, 2010 Joshy I will love you always Aug 1, 2004-Feb 22,2013 Jonah my sweetheart May 2000 - Jan 2015 " You will never need to be alone again. I promise this. As your dog, I will sing this promise to you, and whisper it to you at night, every night, with my breath." Stanley Coren Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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