Our Dog Is A Cat

[Guest cwholsin]

Hello again,

 

Hermes' mom here. I think I'm really just looking for some reassurance that there's still hope for change for Hermes. He's been slow opening up to my husband and I, but he's not the typical shy hound. He's really very friendly and loves to meet people and other dogs, he's just very reserved at home most of the time. We posted here once about the same issue, afraid that Hermes really doesn't like living with us and received many stories of how hounds will open up much more over time and I'm hoping that some folks might contribute if they've had the same kind of dog.

 

Hermes mastered all the physical realities of the house very quickly, and was relaxing very quickly at first. We had his first very exuberant play in the first day or two of bringing him home when he fell in love with his very first squeaky toy. The playing stopped altogether within the first week as he retreated into his shell. He picked up very quickly on house rules (except for housetraining!) and was mastering basic commands. He was quiet, submissive, and obedient to us--but not very affectionate or outgoing. He's developed a little bit in fits and starts over the next two months and here we are at three and a half months and he still just doesn't seem comfortable to me.

 

He does come to us for affection and gets playful with us before mealtimes. He likes to howl with us, enjoys his walks and going to the park. One time he even did zoomies around the bedroom and yipped and yapped at me to play with him. But he just withdraws back into himself. I've almost forgotten what other dogs are like, he's so reserved. We rarely get wagging tails from him, and it's a struggle to get him off his dog bed half the time.

 

We let him sleep in the bed with us, which he seems to really like, but he won't really snuggle with us. Sleeping in the bed with us seemed to make a difference in his feelings towards us and he would follow me around for the first few days after sleeping with me as if it made him feel like we were all more of a pack. But that faded after the first few days. He doesn't interact with the house very much, and still seems to be uncomfortable at times. We have a really hard time getting him excited ourselves, and though we've had a lot of success training him with bits of food--he doesn't show motivation to work for the happy party response from us. He happily does tricks he knows with or without food, but isn't motivated to try and get a happy excited reaction from us.

 

I've come to terms with the fact that he may never be very playful or outgoing--my husband is happy with him the way that he is and we've decided that if that's not who he's going to be, we'll get another dog that will fulfill that desire for me. Hermes can just be the background dog if that's what he wants to be. I've gotten over wanting to turn him into a dog that he may never be. He still just seems to be so uncomfortable sometimes. We have a dog trainer who's a friend of ours who has confirmed my suspicion that through his calmness is underlying discomfort.

 

That being said, it'd be really nice to hear from others that live with proof Hermes may still come out of his shell. It's so weird because he'll have moments where he acts like a normal happy dog, which gets a wonderful happy positive response from us--but he hasn't increased that kind of behavior. Are those moments glimpses of the dog he'll eventually be or just random moments of extreme excitement from him?

 

The advice from our friend is to do some fun training with a yummy treat when he notice him being uncomfortable since that relaxes him and makes him feel more at ease--and trying to got some play behaviors during training time that we can reward..

 

Anyway, I really appreciate the support you guys have been able to give. I'm a little upset with our adoption agency upon learning that the experience we've had with him is pretty normal. They really should tell new owners that this kind of thing may happen, and not to feel like the dog hates you, or doesn't like living with you, etc. We had no idea--or maybe Hermes just isn't a very typical when he waffles back and forth between being shy and uncomfortable and wanting scritches and roaching around.

[Guest dizzyLu72]

I feel like Jacob has some similar characteristics to Hermes.. Jacob is very different from my two previous dogs (which were both large breeds that lived to be 13 yrs old). My previous dogs would follow me like shadows, sit at my feet, come in the kitchen for scraps (which they rarely received) when they heard me clanking around. They would (when younger) jump in the bed and whine if I wouldn't let them, they were very snuggly and if I was sitting down they would require to be touched at all times. They would bark when people entered and always get up to check on me if they heard something. More like "guard dogs".

I figured Jacob would take a few weeks to adjust.. and he did open up a little after the first few weeks and I have just now had him for 4 months and I still see changes taking place. However, at first I was worried that he was depressed, he slept a lot, wasn't clingy for attention. He would come upstairs if I was upstairs.. but not necessarily sit in the same room. Sometimes if I haven't been gone too long, he may not even get up to greet me at the door. If I lay on the floor with him, he's not real snuggly, but will reach his paw out to touch me.. but not demand to be pet or snuggled. He is very different from my previous dogs, but I also know he had a completely different history. He was a business tool for lack of a better home.. then he was adopted (to what I believe was a healthy home).. returned (due to owners work schedule) and re-adopted by me. He's almost 5 yrs old. He never barks. I consider him more of a "watch dog" than a "guard dog". He continues to improve when I call his name at the dog park, or even when we are at home. He will do zoomies in small spurts and loves the squeaky ball. He seems concerned about my whereabouts.. but not determined to shadow me.

I would be willing to believe that your dog is perfectly happy and loves you and your family very much.. After reading many posts here about how calm these dogs can be, how much they like/love to sleep and how several don't bark that much.. I began to realize that my greyhound is just a special dog. They are a unique breed and I know he loves and appreciates me. Im sure the same way that your dog loves and appreciates you all in his own special way.

Best of luck to you all as you continue to grow together over the years..

[Guest dizzyLu72]

I feel like Jacob has some similar characteristics to Hermes.. Jacob is very different from my two previous dogs (which were both large breeds that lived to be 13 yrs old). My previous dogs would follow me like shadows, sit at my feet, come in the kitchen for scraps (which they rarely received) when they heard me clanking around. They would (when younger) jump in the bed and whine if I wouldn't let them, they were very snuggly and if I was sitting down they would require to be touched at all times. They would bark when people entered and always get up to check on me if they heard something. More like "guard dogs".

I figured Jacob would take a few weeks to adjust.. and he did open up a little after the first few weeks and I have just now had him for 4 months and I still see changes taking place. However, at first I was worried that he was depressed, he slept a lot, wasn't clingy for attention. He would come upstairs if I was upstairs.. but not necessarily sit in the same room. Sometimes if I haven't been gone too long, he may not even get up to greet me at the door. If I lay on the floor with him, he's not real snuggly, but will reach his paw out to touch me.. but not demand to be pet or snuggled. He is very different from my previous dogs, but I also know he had a completely different history. He was a business tool for lack of a better home.. then he was adopted (to what I believe was a healthy home).. returned (due to owners work schedule) and re-adopted by me. He's almost 5 yrs old. He never barks. I consider him more of a "watch dog" than a "guard dog". He continues to improve when I call his name at the dog park, or even when we are at home. He will do zoomies in small spurts and loves the squeaky ball. He seems concerned about my whereabouts.. but not determined to shadow me.

I would be willing to believe that your dog is perfectly happy and loves you and your family very much.. After reading many posts here about how calm these dogs can be, how much they like/love to sleep and how several don't bark that much.. I began to realize that my greyhound is just a special dog. They are a unique breed and I know he loves and appreciates me. Im sure the same way that your dog loves and appreciates you all in his own special way.

Best of luck to you all as you continue to grow together over the years..

[lilythetigerdog]

I think more time is needed. He will never be a Lab or a Border Collie for sure, but give him more time to be comfortable.

 

It took Silver over a year to really play with stuffies, and some times I am still convinced he doesn't love me! lol. Maybe he just needs alone time? Lily is glued to me all the time, and Silver is more of his own dog. Lily has been with us for over 3 years, and Silver for almost a year and a half. I still see Silver changing more and more every day and I expect it will take even longer for him to act like he truly loves us. I'll wait.

 

Hermes may never be the way you want him to be. What's wrong with letting him be himself? He might surprise you...

[Laurenbiz]

I have to ask...

 

How long have you had him???

[Guest avadogner]

Hermes mum,

We chatted before and you are familiar with my sweet girl Ava. When we adopted Ava 9 years ago, she was the most outgoing dog at the track and when she came home she was a DIFFERENT dog. She shook, cried and hid in her crate for 3 days. We couldn't entice her out even after she soiled it. On walks, she would freeze up and shake anytime a car or loud noise occured. I cried and almost took her back because I felt she was under so much stress. I thought we ruined her life. She was 18 mo old so she was still a pup mentally so she did play a little eventuallyand learned to enjoy walks.

 

She remained indifferent to us and was space aggressive in her bed. She actually broke my nose when I leaned over her bed to pet her. She jumped up to defend herself and her thick nogin hit me. Our friends called her "the freak". I found a huge scar on her neck that was hidden in her hair. I don't know what happened but it was a major injury. I imagine it contributed to her skitishness and indifference.I made a point of spending a hour every night when I got off the second shift (midnight when things were quiet at home). I used premium treats and gave them to her for allowing me in her bed and then for when she initiated more petting. I will be honest, it took a couple years but by the time Ava was 4 she was sleeping with us with either me spooned around her. She is now the my personal therapy hound. She is the best cuddler ever.

 

When she turned 9 and her arthritis go worse, she slowly withdrew from sleeping with us . We have stairs to traverse to get to our bedroom. About 6 months ago, she started withdrawing from us. She refused walking, eating and wasn't interested in anything. After a ton of vet bills, we were told, she needs a buddy (in addition to her hip defect and worsening arthritis). So we adopted our Beta boy Augie and you how that has been from our chats. Within a couple days, Ava was wagging her tail more than she had the last years. She seems to enjoy Augie's company and now they compete for our attention. It is great to be so adored. I don't know if y'all have room for a second hound but maybe Hermes needs a buddy. Augie does not do well when Ava or me are out of his presence. I imagine if we didn't have Ava, Augie would be a withdrawn mess. He is my velcro boy and follows me everywhere. Ava is more catlike and comes to us when she wants but having a challenger for attention, she is far more into being cuddled. I hope this helps. I know how much you adore Hermes and I remember how sad I felt when Ava snubbed me in the early days. Hang in there and keep me posted.

-ava and augie's mum

[sarabz]

One of our very good friends was really, really, REALLY against us getting a dog when we first started talking about it. He's really not a dog person, doesn't have much use for them... but LOVES Bella because he thinks she's a cat in a dog's body. She occasionally wags, can be affectionate in her own way, but most of the time is perfectly happy minding her own business and having us come to her if we want to give her attention.

 

It's a striking contrast when we take Bella to my parents' house, since they have three Golden Retrievers who are ALWAYS ALL OVER EVERYONE for affection and attention.

 

Goldens - ohpleaseplaywithmepatmeohijustmetyoubutiloveloveLOVEyouespeciallyifyoupatme

Greys - I'll allow you to scritch my neck if you do it properly, maybe I'll look at you intently for a moment if you're about to give me a treat, and I'll use your leg as a pillow if it's properly placed. Ok, I'm over it, time for a nap.

 

From what I read here on GT, there can be big personality ranges, too.

[BootsyCollins]

Argos was never a cuddler. He was a lot like Hermes, from the sound of it. Bootsy is the exact opposite and I wish he'd leave me alone half the time.

I'm sorry it's painful for you, but he may never become the affectionate hound you hope him to be. I suggest that if you had your heart set on a cuddler, get a second dog, a breed that is more apt to that. My sister has an australian shepherd who needs more exercise than I could ever give a dog, but man is he a lover. He warms my heart. I also had a westie for a time that was great for that.

 

good luck

Edited December 2, 2010 by CMoon75

[Guest cwholsin]

I have to ask...

 

How long have you had him???

 

Just three and a half months. He's a young'n at the age of 3. I understand that greyhounds are lazy, calm and quiet dogs (and I really love that about sighthounds), just wondering if anyone else has experience with a dog that's not quite shy but not really outgoing either--just waffles back and forth. I'm happy to let him be what he wants to be, if he never gets very playful then I'll just make sure the next dog we get loves to play with me instead! If he was a totally shy dog, I guess I'd know that he'd eventually come out of it but the waffling back and forth between being fine and happy and being insecure and stressed (our friend pointed out that he was 'grimacing' and the tightness in his expression eased when we tried a little training) that confuses me. He'll have days where he really feels like he's a part of the family, and the next day he'll be reserved all day long and ignore us. I know dogs have 'off' days so I don't worry too much about it. I know he'll keep changing--I guess I'm just wondering about other people who have seen/had dogs who go back and forth. More of a 'I feel sad that he's still not quite feeling like he fits'

 

He's going to stay with us, regardless, I guess I just wanted to hear about how other dogs have changed and their personalities come out and relax and start to get snarky and silly. I've seen little bits of that from him, but they're few and far between. I've considered that maybe I'm spending TOO much time with him and he needs space to come and seek us out when he's feeling stressed--or to try the training trick that erased the stress on his face the other night.

Edited December 2, 2010 by cwholsin

[Remolacha]

I posted yesterday (I think it was yesterday ) in Cute & Funny about how Molly is starting to get silly and playful after a little over two years in my house. She would have occasional bursts of playfulness, but most of the time she was rather reserved. She rarely comes to me for affection, but is happy to get it if I go to her. Yes, she is a Princess . I never really got the sense that she was unhappy or uncomfortable here, I just thought (and still do) that her personality was more reserved and quiet than outgoing and playful. My first greyhound was like that, but she was very shy and timid, which Molly is not. I am kind of a quiet, stay in the background kind of person myself, so I guess it didn't bother me that she was also like that.

 

Also, I have two other greys that are the opposite. Fletcher is a mama's boy who is always in whatever room I'm in, very playful, a real goof. Sallie, my newest girl, I call an affection slut She will go up to anyone and put her head in their lap, and stay there as long as they keep petting her. She thinks everyone who comes to the house has come to see her

 

I guess my point is, three months isn't very long, and he will probably continue to come out over time. That being said, his personality may just be somewhat reserved, you can see from my examples above, greyhounds come in all "flavors".

[Guest cwholsin]

Thanks for all the responses!

 

I may end up getting a dog to be 'my' dog that's more my style. My cat, actually, has more of the qualities that I associate as 'dog' qualities. He really loves being around people, and really enjoys being loved on. He seeks out attention frequently, and invites me to play with him several times a day. He requires a lot of attention, comes when calls, follows directions, and acts out if he's not getting enough loving and playtime! His favorite time of the day is bedtime, and gets really excited about getting in bed with my husband and me... Osiris is basically everything I want in a dog lol.

 

Hermes is waaaaay more aloof at this point, and likes to do his own thing. He's only intentionally cuddled up to us a few times since we got him. He does seek out attention from us every day, but doesn't savor it the way that the cat does. He also sleeps way more than the cat, and prefers not to play very much. It's really kind of funny that my cat is more of a dog than the dog. I do appreciate that Hermes is doing a really good job of retiring, and it's really helpful that I don't have to keep my eye glued on him while I'm doing homework/taking a shower/etc. for fear that he's getting into something. It would be nice if he would play with us more--we'll see how he develops. We see glimpses of a dog that seems like that and then it disappears and Hermes goes back to being a cat.

 

I posted yesterday (I think it was yesterday ) in Cute & Funny about how Molly is starting to get silly and playful after a little over two years in my house. She would have occasional bursts of playfulness, but most of the time she was rather reserved. She rarely comes to me for affection, but is happy to get it if I go to her. Yes, she is a Princess . I never really got the sense that she was unhappy or uncomfortable here, I just thought (and still do) that her personality was more reserved and quiet than outgoing and playful. My first greyhound was like that, but she was very shy and timid, which Molly is not. I am kind of a quiet, stay in the background kind of person myself, so I guess it didn't bother me that she was also like that.

 

Also, I have two other greys that are the opposite. Fletcher is a mama's boy who is always in whatever room I'm in, very playful, a real goof. Sallie, my newest girl, I call an affection slut She will go up to anyone and put her head in their lap, and stay there as long as they keep petting her. She thinks everyone who comes to the house has come to see her

 

I guess my point is, three months isn't very long, and he will probably continue to come out over time. That being said, his personality may just be somewhat reserved, you can see from my examples above, greyhounds come in all "flavors".

 

Too cute! Hermes really likes having visitors in the house, too. He's really friendly, he just doesn't act outgoing very often when it's just us Visitors are a whole different level of exciting!

 

 

 

[RobinM]

He sounds 100% greyhound to me!

[Guest spaztastic_fam]

He may open up more with a second dog in the home as well. I found out that with my two dogs. I have a greyhound, Derby & a mutt Wimbly. They really rely on each other to work through different things and have taught each other a lot. Derby is beginning to play with toys more and has started getting excited when the leashes come out...I think because Wimbly gets so excited. Wimbly taught her to go in and out of the doggie door and all the best places to hide toys. Derby has taught Wimbly how to greet other dogs and meet people. When he gets scared she usually greets strangers and gets loves and then he realizes its ok. Maybe that is what your pup needs.

[kudzu]

So after adopting my first Grey, who loves me but is very reserved, people would ask, "So how is the new dog?" My typical response, "She fantastic if you like cats." I would come home from work & she would be soooo excited, dancing around, snuffling me by rubbing her face in short, quick rubs against my leg, run off to grab a stuffy, run back to me, run off to grab a stuffy, run back, spin in a circle, run to grab a stuffy & then plop down on her bed. Total elapsed time? Approx. 60-90 seconds. BF would then say, "She's done being a dog." Yes, she can be very affectionate & yes, she can be playful & yes, she is a joy to own & love. She loves going out & doing things. She loves being with me. But she ain't no retriever! Then again, I choose Greyhounds intentionally because of that. When you read that Greyhounds can be aloof, she is that Greyhound.

 

Next Grey was more outgoing even though he was already 10 yo when I adopted him. He was probably more like Hermes. Newest boy is curious & affectionate with everyone but still very much a sleepy sighthound. He is politely friendly, not a social butterfly. Basically they are all Greyhounds in the moderately friendly to reserved category. They all love me & I adore them.

 

We will not speak of the Deerhound known as the Luna-tic. She is a BC in a sighthound body.

[Guest kiana325]

Many greyhounds are just very cat like, but I bet he also gets a bit more affectionate as time goes on. At a little over 3 months he is still adjusting.

 

Definitely keep up the training sessions! It sounds like it makes both you and him feel good, so why not.

 

Also, if you are really wanting him to play you have to play the games that he was bred for. Retrievers love to retrieve, sighthounds love to chase things try putting a stuffy on the end of a string and dragging it around a bit.... that's a greyhound kind of game! Just be careful because they move fast.

[Guest cwholsin]

Many greyhounds are just very cat like, but I bet he also gets a bit more affectionate as time goes on. At a little over 3 months he is still adjusting.

 

Definitely keep up the training sessions! It sounds like it makes both you and him feel good, so why not.

 

Also, if you are really wanting him to play you have to play the games that he was bred for. Retrievers love to retrieve, sighthounds love to chase things try putting a stuffy on the end of a string and dragging it around a bit.... that's a greyhound kind of game! Just be careful because they move fast.

 

I'm going to try that right now with his favorite jackalope stuffy!

[Laurenbiz]

I think you are fretting too much about Hermes

 

When Justin and I first met Bernie in September at the rescue group's kennel, we met an outgoing, confident, friendly guy. When he finally stepped foot in our house in October, that charm that attracted us to him in the first place seemed to disappear. The EXACT same thing happened to us during the first week, as well, in which you said that Hermes was very playful and excited on the first or second day, and then he suddenly stopped that behavior.

 

When this happened with Bernie, I was convinced that - somehow - reality had set in for him that he was no longer living and playing with 30+ of his other Greyhound friends. I thought he was actually depressed! But, I kept reminding myself of something that every other adopter I've spoken with from the same rescue group has told me: "It takes approx. a year for a Greyhound's true personality to emerge."

 

So, with Hermes not opening up the way you'd like him to within the first three months is something that I don't see as a red flag, considering that phrase that I've heard time and time and time again!

 

Also, another phrase I've heard repeatedly is that Greyhounds are known as 'the cat of the dog world.' So, him not being terribly interested in squeaky toys - or you - is a behavior that, I think, is expected of Greyhounds! They aren't Goldens or Labs

 

Bernie had a fairly rough first week with us, but I think the second week was a little easier. The third week was better. By the time he was a month into living with us, we had obviously seen some changes, even though they were small changes. Now, he's been with us two months - TODAY! - and we are still seeing changes.

 

Hermes is just three months into his new life. Give him time

[Guest cwholsin]

I think you are fretting too much about Hermes

 

When Justin and I first met Bernie in September at the rescue group's kennel, we met an outgoing, confident, friendly guy. When he finally stepped foot in our house in October, that charm that attracted us to him in the first place seemed to disappear. The EXACT same thing happened to us during the first week, as well, in which you said that Hermes was very playful and excited on the first or second day, and then he suddenly stopped that behavior.

 

When this happened with Bernie, I was convinced that - somehow - reality had set in for him that he was no longer living and playing with 30+ of his other Greyhound friends. I thought he was actually depressed! But, I kept reminding myself of something that every other adopter I've spoken with from the same rescue group has told me: "It takes approx. a year for a Greyhound's true personality to emerge."

 

So, with Hermes not opening up the way you'd like him to within the first three months is something that I don't see as a red flag, considering that phrase that I've heard time and time and time again!

 

Also, another phrase I've heard repeatedly is that Greyhounds are known as 'the cat of the dog world.' So, him not being terribly interested in squeaky toys - or you - is a behavior that, I think, is expected of Greyhounds! They aren't Goldens or Labs

 

Bernie had a fairly rough first week with us, but I think the second week was a little easier. The third week was better. By the time he was a month into living with us, we had obviously seen some changes, even though they were small changes. Now, he's been with us two months - TODAY! - and we are still seeing changes.

 

Hermes is just three months into his new life. Give him time

 

Good! It's really hard to know what to do--sometimes he seems to like it when we interact with him and sometimes he's totally unresponsive to it. Hopefully he'll pick up some adorable quirks along the way (preferably quirks that don't involve peeing in the house anymore!!!!!!) I enjoy watching him fastidiously clean his feet....

 

Nobody with the adoption said anything to us about an adjustment time of more than a week or two.... they also didn't seem concerned with pairing us up with a dog that matched what we said we wanted! We were hoping for a higher energy dog, and got the laziest one I've ever met! At least that means he's happy enough to sleep in with me when he's in the bed

[Guest sheila]

I have had 6 greys in my house and a couple of them have always seemed to have a bubble around them. It's like they can take you or leave you. They have been sweet and well behaved and occasionally affectionate. I just have accepted them for who they were and didn't expect any more than that. I've also had some that are uber excited just to have me rub their ears and play with em.

I don't know if these means anything, but my racing washouts/non racers have always been more adaptable as pets then successful racers.

[GeorgeofNE]

He sounds 100% greyhound to me!

 

Ditto.

 

I've had George for over 2 years. He plays (alone) with one of his stuffies for MAYBE 2 minutes a MONTH. His primary interests are: food, walks, and sleep. Yes, he'll snuggle with me--when he feels like it. Yes, he follows me around, but I think just hoping food might appear! He's friendly with strangers, loves people, does NOT like other breeds of dogs, and is a lovely quite companion. But he is NOTHING like any dog I've ever had. But at this stage in my life, he's what I wanted.

[Guest Samantha]

Just sounds like a typical greyhound to me!, he will love you just they dont show it the way other dogs will. Id say youve made a huge break through if hes sharing a bed with you!!. Maddison is so laid back shes horizontal, she has a mad 5 minutes now n again playing but is happy to lie on her bed ALL day, until dinner time, then she comes and nudges you and wants loved on. She rarely gets excited about ANYTHING. The only time she gets excited is when my son comes home from school, she has a special bond with him, but again is very reserved and just likes to be beside him at all times. Hermes will never be like a lab or collie, but he is special and im positive he loves u and is happy....he's just being a greyhound . I bet in afew months time, he'll be a lot different and you will wonder what you ever worried about.

 

Good Luck x

[Guest Greyt_dog_lover]

From your posts I hate to say this, but it really sounds as if you didn't realize what you were getting. You keep making references to the hound to try to get a reaction out of YOU. Greyhounds have been raised independent of humans in a pack, they have not been raised, nor does the breed seem to exhibit, with the desire to please or otherwise serve humans as all other breeds of dog have. What you are describing is pretty much typical behavior. Do you expect a cat to try to please you? This is the reason that most people say greyhounds are more like cats than dogs, they usually don't have the desire to please you. Are they affectionate, in their own way, yes. It really sounds like you are expecting a golden retriever. As others have said, I would make a lure pole to play, as well as take your hound to the pet store or other places every week. Go for walks, find some good treats he may love, such as whipped cream out of the can:

Its good to see you will accept your hound for what he is, I just think you may need to come to the realization that what you really want is something that most greyhounds aren't. That is not to say that there are no greyhounds with the traits you seem to want, but the majority are not the type of dog to try to "please" its master.

 

Chad

[Guest cwholsin]

I'm well aware that Hermes will never be like a lab or golden retriever--which I am completely fine with. I like that he'll sleep quietly when I'm doing homework and not constantly in my face. I love how quiet he is, and I love how sensitive he is. What I'm trying to communicate about trying to 'please' is confidence and interest in training. We've been able to accomplish a lot with him in training so far; his sits, lies down, waits, shakes, plays dead, etc. but what I'm not seeing in him (which is related to the play thing) is that he's not very interested in getting praise. If we ask him for a new trick (we're trying to teach him how to spin), he isn't really actively trying to figure out what we're asking. He definitely does like training, though. Some days it seems that he's really connecting with us, and some days he's totally aloof. It's confusing. I guess he just hasn't been with us long enough to form a really solid bond with him. It seems to vary day-to-day how he feels about us. One day he'll follow me around and ask for attention off and on all day, and the next he'll ignore me completely. I know that he's still adjusting to a lot..

 

I don't -want- a dog that's going to be in my face all day like a labrador or retriever, but I love Hermes' gentle affections when he's got them to give, and playing with him gives me so much joy. I'm just not sure how to bring that out of him. I'm just wondering who else has had a dog that started off ambivalent like Hermes and grew into a happy, loving dog and if they have any advice on things we can do to help him along as he figures his new life out!

 

He does love treats and he gets really excited when we go to the pet store. If we let him pick out a new toy every time we went, we'd have a mountain of stuffies by now!

 

Yeah, I'm impatient and I'm kind of a perfectionist--so it's good that Hermes is teaching me to be patient. I just hate seeing him stressed out, but am not sure what to do to help him relax more--it seems to be more environmental than interactions with us that stress him out. Lately he's started standing in the entryway and looking around uncertainly for minutes after a walk like he's not sure what to do. He just stands there and looks so sad and I have to invite him to come into the room for a head rub and to lay down on his bed.

 

He's never been afraid of interacting with us like some of the shy dogs are. His friendliness is what made me choose him! Of the two dogs we were considering, Hermes was the one who got up and wagged at me when I first met him! The other dog was not interested in meeting a new person.

 

Lure games: I tried it once earlier after his walk and he wasn't interested, but I tried it again when I got home from Christmas shopping and he did chase it a bit! Yay! We'll have to make one to take to the park with us, great suggestion!

 

2nd dog: I would LOVE to be able to get a second dog... I agree that it probably would go a long ways towards bringing Hermes out of his shell. He loves being around dogs, but unfortunately our living situation won't permit a second dog for the time being so that'll be at least another year or so before we can realistically bring home another dog. Too bad!

Edited December 3, 2010 by cwholsin

[greysmom]

To answer your basic question, yes, Hermes is acting like many greyhounds act at this point in their adaptation to home life. It's really too soon to say if his personality is going to turn the happy/playful/interactive way or if he will stay more aloof and restrained. For some greys, it can take literally months and months for their "true" personalities emerge. Yes, some step into a home directly from the track and are completely relaxed and available for their people. You did not get one of those greyhounds. I'll say again what many others have said - it's too soon to know and you need to STOP fretting about it!

 

Greyhounds are bred and trained to perform their basic genetic functions - hunting and running - completely independently. They hunt by themselves, not in a pack (usually), and when they race, it's everybody against everybody else and they have to have the desire to run on their own and win on their own. They don't care about pleasing the human that catches them at the end. They care about running really fast, eating and sleeping, and doing it all again the next time.

 

Make sure you're not projecting your emotions onto him. When he's standing in the hall looking around, he may just be thinking about what he wants to do - Hmmmm. Should I lay on *that* bed or go get a drink of water? By calling him to you, you help him decide. But I doubt he's really sad or indecisive at that point. Mine will often stand around, and if I leave them alone, they will go do what they want - lay on the bed, or get a drink, or step on somebody else's head, or some bug me for pets. As much as we anthropomorphize greyhounds on GT, they really don't feel emotions like sadness - they deal in the here and now, and sometimes the near future or the near past.

 

Short story:

I have some friends - a couple with a 5 yr old boy - and they wanted a dog. Many of their freinds have greyhounds, so they looked into them and eventually adopted a wonderful young male. The greyhound was great with their son, very patient and careful for all his big size, and things seemed to be going smoothly. The greyhound had some SA issues, and because they had the room and the means they looked into adopting another dog.

 

The husband would have been happy with another greyhound. He loved the one they had and felt their personalities were good for their house and situation. But the wife wanted a dog that was more interactive. She wanted a dog who would play with her whenever she wanted, not just when the dog felt like it. She wanted a dog that would come when she called. She wanted a dog that would snuggle and be into physical contact. She wanted a dog to wrestle and play with their son. So, to keep the peace in the house, the husband gave in and they adopted a year old lab mix.

 

This couple just ended up re-homing their lab mix with the wonderful and extremely active home of the man who they had to ask to come in and walk the lab every day. The lab had to be crated when they were not home because he destroyed their house. He needed way more exercise than the two of them could provide with them both working full-time jobs. He played too roughly for their son. He wanted to be in the wife's lap whenever she sat down. The lab did help the greyhound's SA, but the cost was more than they could handle.

 

Moral of the story - Be careful what you wish for!

 

 

 

ETA - if you want a greyhound that will be more "labby" they do exist - I have one! You have to be very specific with the adoption group and define what you want and need and not settle for a dog that's NOT. I'm not saying your group did a bad job, but a larger group might have more variety to choose from for you.

Edited December 3, 2010 by greysmom

[Guest cwholsin]

To answer your basic question, yes, Hermes is acting like many greyhounds act at this point in their adaptation to home life. It's really too soon to say if his personality is going to turn the happy/playful/interactive way or if he will stay more aloof and restrained. For some greys, it can take literally months and months for their "true" personalities emerge. Yes, some step into a home directly from the track and are completely relaxed and available for their people. You did not get one of those greyhounds. I'll say again what many others have said - it's too soon to know and you need to STOP fretting about it!

 

Greyhounds are bred and trained to perform their basic genetic functions - hunting and running - completely independently. They hunt by themselves, not in a pack (usually), and when they race, it's everybody against everybody else and they have to have the desire to run on their own and win on their own. They don't care about pleasing the human that catches them at the end. They care about running really fast, eating and sleeping, and doing it all again the next time.

 

Make sure you're not projecting your emotions onto him. When he's standing in the hall looking around, he may just be thinking about what he wants to do - Hmmmm. Should I lay on *that* bed or go get a drink of water? By calling him to you, you help him decide. But I doubt he's really sad or indecisive at that point. Mine will often stand around, and if I leave them alone, they will go do what they want - lay on the bed, or get a drink, or step on somebody else's head, or some bug me for pets. As much as we anthropomorphize greyhounds on GT, they really don't feel emotions like sadness - they deal in the here and now, and sometimes the near future or the near past.

 

Short story:

I have some friends - a couple with a 5 yr old boy - and they wanted a dog. Many of their freinds have greyhounds, so they looked into them and eventually adopted a wonderful young male. The greyhound was great with their son, very patient and careful for all his big size, and things seemed to be going smoothly. The greyhound had some SA issues, and because they had the room and the means they looked into adopting another dog.

 

The husband would have been happy with another greyhound. He loved the one they had and felt their personalities were good for their house and situation. But the wife wanted a dog that was more interactive. She wanted a dog who would play with her whenever she wanted, not just when the dog felt like it. She wanted a dog that would come when she called. She wanted a dog that would snuggle and be into physical contact. She wanted a dog to wrestle and play with their son. So, to keep the peace in the house, the husband gave in and they adopted a year old lab mix.

 

This couple just ended up re-homing their lab mix with the wonderful and extremely active home of the man who they had to ask to come in and walk the lab every day. The lab had to be crated when they were not home because he destroyed their house. He needed way more exercise than the two of them could provide with them both working full-time jobs. He played too roughly for their son. He wanted to be in the wife's lap whenever she sat down. The lab did help the greyhound's SA, but the cost was more than they could handle.

 

Moral of the story - Be careful what you wish for!

 

 

 

ETA - if you want a greyhound that will be more "labby" they do exist - I have one! You have to be very specific with the adoption group and define what you want and need and not settle for a dog that's NOT. I'm not saying your group did a bad job, but a larger group might have more variety to choose from for you.

 

 

I haven't heard too many stories about dogs who are slow to warm up who AREN'T really shy and unsure about all the things that are going on, so it's good to know that he's still normal even though he isn't outwardly experiencing much culture shock.

 

You don't need to warn me against going out and getting too much dog! There are some high energy breeds that I like, but I am way too lazy to have a high energy dog like a lab or border collie. Our friends have a lab that's a service dog--and he's fabulous when he's working but he's a menace when he's off-duty. A medium energy dog would be perfect. Enjoys laying around some, enjoys playing with us some. We get a lot of enjoyment playing with our two kitties and Hermes when he'll let us.

 

The adoption agency did request you fill out a questionnaire about the energy level, sociability, and necessary metal stimulation we were looking for, it just didn't seem to factor in much in the dogs that they suggested and we didn't really push it too hard. All that really means for us is that we'll do a trial if we get another greyhound to see if he/she fits with the household and our lifestyle.

 

The standing around behavior is different from his wanderings around the house. He will stand stock-still (not even shifting his weight if his legs were in an awkward position when I took the leash off) and stare off at me as I go into the rest of the house. One time I made a cup of tea, used the restroom, and when I looked back he was still standing in the exact same place staring through the house at me with his ears back and tail down. He had literally been standing there for a good five minutes or more. I've tried giving the release command, but he still won't move until I call him over and then he'll go over to his bed or stand by me for more pets. It's not the same look he gets when he's just deciding where to go. This has happened before in the kitchen, too, when he's come in from potty time but that's a little more normal since he gets fed in the kitchen

 

Whatever he turns out to be, we will keep him--so I'm not going to ditch him just because he doesn't play enough... just would probably get another dog that is more interested in playtime! Considering the snippets we've seen between his bouts of reticence, hopefully he will end up enjoying playing with us more often. He's shown that there IS a goofy side in there somewhere...I'm just reaaaaallly eager to see it come out more!!!

 

 

Edited December 3, 2010 by cwholsin