Pippin Posted September 9, 2006 Share Posted September 9, 2006 (edited) It hurts too much to try and detail the last month of my little one's life... the worries, concerns, and hopes that were ended when Doc called me last Thurs night and said "it's time." My little one was in the early stages of renal failure, and I was about to have 3 weeks on the road, so if we waited I might not be around to say goodbye. So today we had one last vet visit. Dee was there, and my little girl was as surrounded with love as it's possible to be. All 3 of us (dee, me and the vet) were petting her and loving on her at the end, telling her how good she was. I've known this was coming since she didn't get her dental on 8/8 due to her kidney values being bad. And I know it's the right thing to do, and the right time to do it (she was barely eating, and not keeping down most of what she ate), but that doens't really make it any easier. We were perfect for each other. I needed a lapdog, and she needed a lap. Once we found what we needed, we called off the search. I won't spend my days waiting for an angel to descend. Searching for a rainbow with an end Now that I've found you, I'll call off the search. And I won't spend my life gazing at the stars up in the sky Wondering if love will pass me by Now that I've found you, I'll call off the search. Out on my own I would never have known This world that I see today And I've got a feeling it won't fade away. And I won't end my days wishing that love would come along 'Cause you are in my life where you belong Now that I've found you, I'll call off the search. -Mike Batt- Jessie in May 2004, 2 weeks after moving in with me: early July 2006: You can see clearly now, little one. And hear the birds sing and the crickets chirp. Edited September 9, 2006 by Pippin Quote Mary Semper Fi, Dad - I miss you. Remembering Carla Benoist, a Greyhound/Pibble's bestest friend, Princess Zoe Brick-Butt, the little IG with the huge impact on hearts around the world - Miz Foxy - Greyhound Trish - Batman, the Roman-nosed Gentleman - Profile, the Handsome Man - Hunky the Hunkalicious - Jeany the Beautiful Lady- Zema, the most beautiful girl in the world - Jessie, the lovable nuisance - and my 3 Greys: my Angie-girl, my Casey-girl, and The Majestic Pippin, running forever in my heart. (I will always love you and miss you,my friends) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest argolola Posted September 9, 2006 Share Posted September 9, 2006 (edited) I'm so sorry that your angel had to leave. May God bless you and heal your broken heart. Edited September 10, 2006 by argolola Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest lds001 Posted September 9, 2006 Share Posted September 9, 2006 I am so sorry for your loss and yes....she can see clearly now. You are in my thoughts Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DoneRacin Posted September 9, 2006 Share Posted September 9, 2006 I am so sorry. What a beautiful girl. My heart goes out to you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HopeForHounds Posted September 9, 2006 Share Posted September 9, 2006 Oh Mary I'm so sorry. Godspeed little one. You were loved. Quote Casual Bling & Hope for HoundsJanet & the hounds Maggie and Allen Missing my baby girl Peanut, old soul Jake, quirky Jet, Mama Grandy and my old Diva Miz Foxy; my angel, my inspiration. You all brought so much into my light, and taught me so much about the power of love, you are with me always.If you get the chance to sit it out or dance.......... I hope you dance! Missing our littlest girl. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
smday Posted September 9, 2006 Share Posted September 9, 2006 I'm so sorry. Susan Quote Lexi the pointeresque mutt (1999), Homer the chi mix (2010) and Lacey the ? (2009). Always remembering Dita, Best, Oba, Bubba, and the others at the bridge. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pippin Posted September 9, 2006 Author Share Posted September 9, 2006 here's the official rememberance post. I'm gonna go hide now. ************************************************************* I won't spend my days waiting for an angel to descend. Searching for a rainbow with an end Now that I've found you, I'll call off the search. And I won't spend my life gazing at the stars up in the sky Wondering if love will pass me by Now that I've found you, I'll call off the search. Out on my own I would never have known This world that I see today And I've got a feeling it won't fade away. And I won't end my days wishing that love would come along 'Cause you are in my life where you belong Now that I've found you, I'll call off the search. -Mike Batt- I was looking for a lapdog; she was looking for a lap. We found each other, so call off the search. Her little stubby body held an over-sized heart. Her opaque eyes shone with love for her human. She was the perfect size for a lapdog, and knew exactly how to keep my back warm at night. The turbo-tail never stopped, and the retractable tongue didn't fully retract anymore, but these added to her charm. A companionable nuisance at first, her annoyances quickly became endearments. I'm sitting here thinking about her, and the memories are flooding in... That restless first night in April 2004, when she didn't really know who I was or where she was. She jumped over a babygate that night, surprising me with her agility and her grace. The struggle to get her weight down while continuing the maintenance dosage of prednisone for her "liver abnormality." Her sheer enjoyment of almost any food. If it was edible, she was pretty much all over it. I learned early on to push in the chairs around the kitchen table. I didn't have to do that with my big dog, and one day after lunch I looked up and saw her front paws on the table, her back feet on my chair. She was polishing off the rest of my lunch, that I had intended to have for dinner. After she learned not to eat from the table, she would lie in wait while I ate, her cloudy eyes alert for any dropped crumbs. I never had to vacuum under my table after she moved in. As her eyes deteriorated, her nose took over, sniffing out every bit of dropped food. She was not a young dog when she joined my family 2 1/2 years ago. She had spent 9 years devoted to a little old lady in Alabama, but the new husband didn't appreciate the value of an IG's love, so she needed a new home. I needed a lapdog and a companion for my greyhound, so it seemed like a good match. And once we got past the adjustment period, it was. Well, except for the time she wasn't looking, and jumped off the sofa onto the sleeping greyhound. (oops) There's a reason someone coined the expression "Let sleeping dogs lie." We did a "peace of mind" visit to the vet after that incident. I think that was our first peace of mind visit. There were many more after that. Not only was she an older dog when she moved in with me, but she came with her own set of health issues. A "liver abnormality" that required prednisone to control it, cataracts (that are exacerbated by the pred), and a heart murmur. She got enalapril every day for that. The adoption lady was afraid no one would want an elderly dog with health issues, but my only concern was whether I could afford her meds. Thank goodness for the Costco pharmacy. I was unemployed, so she came to me as a "permanent foster." She would live with me, but the adoption group would pay the vet bills. Then I got a job. To celebrate her "gotcha day," I adopted her. My vet told me the "liver abnormality" was hepatitis, and the pred dose was probably too high. We jiggered the dosage until we found one she could live with. Then one day she wouldn't eat. I got her into see Doc the next day, and we discovered a severely abcessed canine tooth. She wouldn't eat cause it hurt too much. She lost 5 teeth in that dental, including the abcessed canine, and was back to her sassy self again. That was last summer. As the summer faded into fall, I realized she was losing her hearing, and her eyesight. It seemed an unfair blow to a little dog that had already dealt with so much, but we worked around it. She slept more, and would often be sleeping soundly when I arrived home from work, because she didn't hear me come in. She would walk down the hallway like those robot toys that bounce off the walls, adjusting their path each time they hit an obstacle. We joked about getting her a bicycle helmet with curb-feelers on it so she would know when she was getting close to a wall. This summer, it seems that every month brought some type of concern. She wouldn't eat for a day or so, and then would be back to normal. On August 8, I dropped her off for her routine dental, at 8am. Doc called me at 915. Her bloodwork didn't look good - kidney values were up, which is a side-effect of the enalapril. I'd never worried about her kidneys - my concern had always been the liver, because of the hepatitis. We postponed the dental, and put her on a kidney diet. I went out of town on a business trip. My dog-sitter called me Wed night after I'd left. Jessie hadn't eaten for 2 days, and didn't want to come out of her crate. "Take her to Doc," I said. "Drop her off in the morning when you take Angie for her dental." She did. Doc called me that next evening. UTI. Fixable. Strong anti-biotics and life will be good again, we hoped. But she was apathetic about food still, and it took her over a week to get back to anything like her usual self. I was still on the road, and found myself dreaming about my dogs. In my dreams they were loose, and I could find the 2 big girls, but not Jessie. One night as I was falling asleep, I saw her in my mind. She was standing next to a hedge at the edge of a busy street. There was a gap in the hedge, and on the other side it was green grass and blue skies and sunshine. On my side of the hedge it was speeding cars, drizzling rain, and grey shadows. She looked around at me, and looked through the gap, trying to decide which one to choose. "It's ok, honey," I whispered through my tears. "It's ok if you want to go on. I can't come with you right now, but I'll be along later. I promise." She just sat there, staring through the gap in the hedge. That was the night before doc diagnosed the UTI. After the UTI was cleared up, I dreamt again that she was missing. I wasn't looking for her this time - in my dream I was accepting that she wasn't there. This dream confused me, because she was better. Or at least, the UTI was cleared up. That meant she was better, to me. She wasn't better. Doc called me last Thurs evening, and I pulled off the highway to talk to her, so I could give her my full attention. Jessie had been in for follow-up bloodwork, and it didn't look good. The UTI cleared up, but the bloodwork didn't. The kidney values had declined in the last month, and she had lost 2 pounds since Aug 8. Doc said she was on a slow decline, and it wouldn't improve. It would just get worse. She had told me last week that renal failure is NOT peaceful. That euthanasia is a generous decision. I asked her Thursday "what's our next step?" She said "let her go." Earlier this summer, on one of my many "peace of mind" visits with Jessie, Doc & I made an agreement. She would tell me when she thought it was time to let Jessie go, and when she told me that, I would let her go, whether I was in town or not. I wasn't going to make Jessie wait until I was back home if she needed to go sooner. I was 400 miles from home when Doc called me, figuring to get home either very late that night, or sometime mid-morning Friday. Doc had a 40 minute spot open Saturday afternoon.We booked it. That would give me some alone time with my sweetie, and a chance to pamper her overnight, and to say goodbye to her and whisper into her deaf ears how much I love her, and how much she's meant to me. I picked her up Friday when I got into town, and kept her with me with me the rest of the day. I blew off my Friday night commitment, and we hung out together, watching tv and eating popcorn. She wolfed down some raw hamburger, eating like she'd not seen food in days. A couple hours later, she regurgitated undigested hamburger meat. Saturday morning, I took her out to breakfast. Some strangers at the next table collected their bacon and offered it to her. She ate it with obvious enjoyment. A couple hours later, I found undigested bacon on my livingroom floor. If I had any doubts about Doc's call on the timing, these incidents cleared it up. She's a very lucky dog - she's been deeply loved by several people in her life. Her first momma loved her for 9 years, and her vacation-mom and I have loved her for the last 2 1/2. Eleven years of love for a sweet little dog. It's never enough, but it's a damn sight more than some pups get. She's seeing clearly now, and hearing the birds singing around her. The sky is blue where she is, and the grass is green. A brilliantly vivid rainbow is arching across her sky, and a doberman named Burpdog is looking out for her, showing her the sights in her new home. I'll see her again someday. The God who loves me created my little girl just as surely as He created me, and He doesn't forsake his creations. Until then, I have my pictures of her, and my memories. I'd rather have my little girl, snuggling up against me at night, whining and scratching at me in the morning for her breakfast. There will probably be more lapdogs in my life, at some point, but there will never be another Jessie. Quote Mary Semper Fi, Dad - I miss you. Remembering Carla Benoist, a Greyhound/Pibble's bestest friend, Princess Zoe Brick-Butt, the little IG with the huge impact on hearts around the world - Miz Foxy - Greyhound Trish - Batman, the Roman-nosed Gentleman - Profile, the Handsome Man - Hunky the Hunkalicious - Jeany the Beautiful Lady- Zema, the most beautiful girl in the world - Jessie, the lovable nuisance - and my 3 Greys: my Angie-girl, my Casey-girl, and The Majestic Pippin, running forever in my heart. (I will always love you and miss you,my friends) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest hannahmom Posted September 9, 2006 Share Posted September 9, 2006 I am so very very sorry Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DoneRacin Posted September 9, 2006 Share Posted September 9, 2006 """She's seeing clearly now, and hearing the birds singing around her. The sky is blue where she is, and the grass is green. A brilliantly vivid rainbow is arching across her sky, and a doberman named Burpdog is looking out for her, showing her the sights in her new home. I'll see her again someday. The God who loves me created my little girl just as surely as He created me, and He doesn't forsake his creations. Until then, I have my pictures of her, and my memories. I'd rather have my little girl, snuggling up against me at night, whining and scratching at me in the morning for her breakfast. There will probably be more lapdogs in my life, at some point, but there will never be another Jessie.""""" What a glorious sight, Burpdog, the beautiful doberman looking out for her, showing her around that colorful, wonderful scent-filled place, and all the greyhounds flopping behind, ears up, happy to have another playmate!! You gave her what she needed, and she you! A beautiful story, thank you for sharing! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GreyTzu Posted September 9, 2006 Share Posted September 9, 2006 Quote Wendy and The Whole Wherd. American by birth, Southern by choice. "Do not meddle in the affairs of dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup!" ****OxyFresh Vendor ID is 180672239.**** Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Devotion Posted September 9, 2006 Share Posted September 9, 2006 what a beautiful tribute to your Jessie. Run free sweetie and see clearly and feel young again. You are so loved. may your memories become your treasure. Quote Pam with greys Avril, Dalton & Zeus & Diddy the dachshund & Miss Buzz the kitty Devotion, Jingle Bells, Rocky, Hans, Harbor, Lennon, NoLa, Scooter, Naomi and Scout at the bridge Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Snowy8 Posted September 9, 2006 Share Posted September 9, 2006 I am so sorry...the comforting thought is that they are no longer blind, hurt, sick...no more fleas ticks or mosquitos to make them ill. They are running & playing, chasing each other, or laying on clouds & couches. Its comforting to know they're still watching over us also. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ss556 Posted September 9, 2006 Share Posted September 9, 2006 I am so sorry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batmom Posted September 9, 2006 Share Posted September 9, 2006 Mary, I remember when you brought her home, your delight in your littlest one, the sense of contentment and commitment you had for her. You were exactly right for each other. I'm glad she got to gobble hamburger and bacon -- she got the pleasure of eating delicious things, even if they wouldn't stay down. I'm glad you got to be with her. I'm very sorry you had to let her go. Sending sincere condolences and many many hugs. Quote Star aka Starz Ovation (Ronco x Oneco Maggie*, litter #48538), Coco aka Low Key (Kiowa Mon Manny x Party Hardy, litter # 59881), and mom in IllinoisWe miss Reko Batman (Trouper Zeke x Marque Louisiana), 11/15/95-6/29/06, Rocco the thistledown whippet, 04/29/93-10/14/08, Reko Zema (Mo Kick x Reko Princess), 8/16/98-4/18/10, the most beautiful girl in the whole USA, my good egg Joseph aka Won by a Nose (Oneco Cufflink x Buy Back), 09/22/2003-03/01/2013, and our gentle sweet Gidget (Digitizer, Dodgem by Design x Sobe Mulberry), 1/29/2006-11/22/2014, gone much too soon. Never forgetting CJC's Buckshot, 1/2/07-10/25/10. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest greybookends Posted September 10, 2006 Share Posted September 10, 2006 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cully Posted September 10, 2006 Share Posted September 10, 2006 Run free sweet baby girl. You will see your family again someday. Quote waiting at the bridge Connie Van Teddy & Jojo, Cobra Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sonya Posted September 10, 2006 Share Posted September 10, 2006 Sending condolences and hugs. So sorry for your loss Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Houndtime Posted September 10, 2006 Share Posted September 10, 2006 Thank you for sharing the wonderful memorial for your sweet little girl. I am so sorry for your loss. Quote Irene Ullmann w/Flying Odin and Mama Mia in Lower Delaware Angels Brandy, John E, American Idol, Paul, Fuzzy and Shine Handcrafted Greyhound and Custom Clocks http://www.houndtime.com Zoom Doggies-Racing Coats for Racing Greyhounds Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GreyPoopon Posted September 10, 2006 Share Posted September 10, 2006 I'm so sorry. Quote Standard Poodle Daisy (12/13) Missing Cora (RL Nevada 5/99-10/09), Piper (Cee Bar Easy 2/99-1/10), Tally (Thunder La La 9/99-3/10), Edie (Daring Reva 9/99-10/12), Dixie (Kiowa Secret Sue 11/01-1/13), Jessie (P's Real Time 11/98-3/13), token boy Graham (Zydeco Dancer 9/00-5/13), Cal (Back Already 12/99-11/13), Betsy (Back Kick Beth 11/98-12/13), Standard Poodles Minnie (1/99-1/14) + Perry (9/98-2/14), Annie (Do Marcia 9/03-10/14), Pink (Miss Pinky Baker 1/02-6/15), Poppy (Cmon Err Not 8/05-1/16), Kat (Jax Candy 5/05-5/17), Ivy (Jax Isis 10/07-7/21), Hildy (Braska Hildy 7/10-12/22), Opal (Jax Opal 7/08-4/23). Toodles (BL Toodles 7/09-4/24) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest GreysAndMoreGreys Posted September 10, 2006 Share Posted September 10, 2006 Mary, I am so sorry. I'm glad I was able to share a bit of time with you and hear some of the stories about Jessie. GOD speed little one, there are many friends there to play with and protect you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
keiko Posted September 10, 2006 Share Posted September 10, 2006 I'm so very sorry.... Quote Kelly and the boys Andy (Full Details), Savage (SanTan SavageTry), Tag (C Ya Tag Heuer), Hamlet (Huntington's Monarch Hamlet), and Cleopatra (Huntington's Cleopatra) Never forgotten & Always in my heart, Shawn (Call Me Gone) 02/09/99 - 03/23/06 and Josh (Great Contender*) 01/11/98 - 11/29/07 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Becki Posted September 10, 2006 Share Posted September 10, 2006 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tenderhearts Posted September 10, 2006 Share Posted September 10, 2006 What a beautiful little girl! I'm sorry you didn't have longer with her, but the time you did have was chock full of love :grouphug Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guinness_the_greyt Posted September 10, 2006 Share Posted September 10, 2006 I'm so sorry.... What a beautiful tribute for your little girl! Godspeed Jessie! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest TheStylishHound Posted September 10, 2006 Share Posted September 10, 2006 I am so terribly sorry to read about your loss. Godspeed sweet one. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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