Guest suzye Posted September 5, 2009 Share Posted September 5, 2009 One year ago today I said goodbye to Jazz, my first greyhound, my first dog as an adult. Lately all those horrible feelings that I felt for her last 3 days – the panic, fear and dread – have been coming back. I’m sure we all remember exactly what it felt like saying goodbye to our special pets. My wedding anniversary (Sept. 7) is tainted, too. The pet cemetery sent a certificate of cremation (I had no idea this document was coming) with the date on it. Ugh. I still miss her very much. She was my baby, and I nursed her through kidney failure for almost one year, and then her back went out, and there was nothing more I could do. I hope she knows how much I loved her and how sorry I am that I stopped giving her acupuncture after she went into kidney failure because I couldn’t handle all the treatment and expense, and told myself it was OK. I wish I could change that. I don’t want to make that mistake again (forsaking one problem completely for another). I try not to beat myself up for it, but when I get to thinking, it bothers me a little. I mentioned the anniversary to a friend on the phone, and she said, “But you have Popo now.” Yes I do, but I still miss Jazz so much. A lot of people just don’t understand, and they want to change the subject. I know you guys understand, though. Here is her photo book. She was such a beautiful girl. http://share1.sendtoprint.net/bshare.php?h...29fc00c7b72ec83 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Burpdog Posted September 5, 2009 Share Posted September 5, 2009 Gorgeous girl. What wonderful photos! Quote Diane & The Senior Gang Burpdog Biscuits Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MerlinsMum Posted September 5, 2009 Share Posted September 5, 2009 That made me smile and cry Jazz was so very beautiful (those earsies!!! ) and she obviously lived a very happy life with you. There's no mistaking the LOVE in those pictures. Love stays with you and I am sure that you will always miss her. :grouphug Hopefully one day when thinking of her the smile on your face will feel more tangible than the ache in your heart, but I am certain that the ache will never go away completely. I know I will miss Merlin for as long as I live when he leaves me. Please try not to dwell on what you perceive to be failings in her treatment. You did the very best you could under the circumstances and you gave her a happy life filled with love. She is not suffering now, and I have absolutely no doubt whatsoever that she knew how deeply you loved her. Rest in peace, Jazz. Quote Kerry with Lupin in beautiful coastal Maine. Missing Pippin, my best friend and sweet little heart-healer 2013-2023 Also missing the best wizard in the world, Merlin, and my sweet 80lb limpet, Sagan, every single day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HJsM Posted September 5, 2009 Share Posted September 5, 2009 :f_pink Quote ATASCOSITA DIAZ - MY WONDER DOG!Missing our Raisin: 9/9/94 - 7/20/08, our Super Bea: 2003 - 12/16/09, our Howie: 9/17/97 - 4/9/11, our Bull: 8/7/00 - 1/17/13, our Wyatt Earp: 11/22/06 - 12/16/15, and our Cyclone 8/26/05 - 9/12/16 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ss556 Posted September 5, 2009 Share Posted September 5, 2009 A beauty indeed. I'm sure Jazz knew you did right by her and I'm sorry you are re-living her last three days, but in this healing book that I am reading it said that sometimes we have to relive a loved one's illness or death in order to get past it. I think it's natural to think about it with the anniversary here. I can't believe it's a year. Hugs to you, don't beat yourself up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest suzye Posted September 6, 2009 Share Posted September 6, 2009 Thank you everyone. Today felt very much like her last day and the day after. My husband wanted to go shopping (and that NEVER happens!) so we did (which is what we did immediately after, to get out of the house). I also went to my friend's daughter's birthday party, which last year was one day after. Now I'm wondering where the hurricane is (please no hurricane!) At least tiomorrow I should wake up rested. I will never forget how tired I was that next morning. I didn't know it was possible to be that tired. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
4greyhounds Posted September 6, 2009 Share Posted September 6, 2009 Quote Darlene Mom to: Aladdin, Sophie ,Pongo, Jasmine, Relic Forever in our Hearts Champ at the Rainbow Bridge. Let a greyhound race into your heart Adopt Bay Area Greyhound Adoptions INC. Naples/ Fort Myers Chapter Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest myIrishlass Posted September 6, 2009 Share Posted September 6, 2009 Thank you for sharing. Yes, so many of us do understand, and are here to give you virtual hugs and comfort. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest suzye Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 Thanks ladies. It's not out of my system quite yet -- I just read the cards again and had a good cry over the velvet pouch her ashes box came in (I put her collar, leash, and the cards I got in the pouch). I will be OK, though. Time to squeeze Popo. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BertnLil Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 I understand. Quote Pam with Sockem the GH, Birdie the JRT, Osorno the chocolate lab, and Shelby the shepherd mix. Missing Clarice (1991-2007) and Lily (2004-2012), always in our hearts. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hawthorn Posted September 7, 2009 Share Posted September 7, 2009 Quote When a relationship of love is disrupted, the relationship does not cease. The love continues; therefore, the relationship continues. The work of grief is to reconcile and redeem life to a different love relationship. ~ W Scott Lineberry Always Greyhounds Home Boarding and Greyhounds With Love House Sitting Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Charlies_Dad Posted September 8, 2009 Share Posted September 8, 2009 A pretty girl...we understand all to well to lose one of our pups hurts and time may soften the pain, it doesn't change how much we miss them. Quote Kyle with Stewie ('Super C Ledoux, Super C Sampson x Sing It Blondie) and forever missing my three angels, Jack ('Roy Jack', Greys Flambeau x Miss Cobblepot) and Charlie ('CTR Midas Touch', Leo's Midas x Hallo Argentina) and Shelby ('Shari's Hooty', Flying Viper x Shari Carusi) running free across the bridge. Gus an coinnich sinn a'rithist my boys and little girl. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinM Posted September 8, 2009 Share Posted September 8, 2009 A year already. Yeesh. Such a pretty girl. Missed by many. Quote ROBIN ~ Mom to: Beau Think It Aint, Chloe JC Allthewayhome, Teddy ICU Drunk Sailor, Elsie N Fracine , Ollie RG's Travertine, Ponch A's Jupiter~ Yoshi, Zoobie & Belle, the kitties. Waiting at the bridge Angel Polli Bohemian Ocean , Rocky, Blue,Sasha & Zoobie & Bobbi Greyhound Angels Adoption (GAA) The Lexus Project Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest HoustonGreys Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 Oh Suzy, I remember being with Jazz and you at Barnes and Noble wrapping books for Christmas. I remember how much Jazz loved to "nest" in her bed. I still love her curly earsies. Beautiful Jazz. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MandysMom Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 Quote Beverly. Missing my happy toy-flinging boy Sammy (Where's Mandrill), (8/12/2009-9/30-2021) Desperately missing my angel Mandy (BB's Luv) [7/1/2000 - 9/18/2012]. Always missing Meg the Dalmatian and Ralph Malph the Pekeapoo. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest IrskasMom Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 A Beautiful Girl indeed and very much missed Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest greytful4 Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 All of us on here who have lost a houndie know EXACTLY how you feel. That first greyhound and heart hound carries a tremendous amount of bittersweetness to it.Hugs to you.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
fsugrad Posted September 9, 2009 Share Posted September 9, 2009 Jazz was so beautiful. I love the picture in her photobook where someone is holding her face in their hands and giving her a kiss and she has a great big smile on her face. Is that you with her? Quote Rita, mom to Dakota (Dakotas Dream) & Wish (Kiowa Wish Wish) and my angels Toby (Sol Marcus) and Robin (Greys Robin Hood) Forever missing our beloved Robin and Toby "Until one has loved an animal, a part of one's soul remains unawakened." Anatole France Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
45MPHK9 Posted September 10, 2009 Share Posted September 10, 2009 very sorry for your loss. Quote Tricia with Kyle, our senior mutt dog Always missing Murray Maldives, Bee Wiseman, River, Hopper, Kaia, and Holly Oaks Holly“You don't need a weatherman to know which way the wind blows.“ -Bob Dylan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest greysonly Posted September 10, 2009 Share Posted September 10, 2009 I am so sorry for your loss. She was so beautiful. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
racindog Posted September 10, 2009 Share Posted September 10, 2009 Her marvelous photo book is so full of LOVE! And you gotta love those earsies! She is with you still. You didn't fall in love with her body-which is the only thing that died. You fell in love with the real her- her spirit which is still and always will be with you. Don't feel bad about any decision you made. The truth is we actually have no control over when they cross over. There is nothing you could have done or shouldn't have done that would have changed it. She knows this already and wishes you could find peace by realizing it too. You did everything you could and should-you love her without measure. It don't get any better than that for any of us. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest suzye Posted September 18, 2009 Share Posted September 18, 2009 Jazz was so beautiful. I love the picture in her photobook where someone is holding her face in their hands and giving her a kiss and she has a great big smile on her face. Is that you with her? Sorry, we wentout of town shorly after I posted this and I forgot to check back. Actually, that is a total stranger at the dog park. ;-) She loved making friends and I thought that pic was too sweet to leave out. Thank you everyone for your kind words. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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