Two Years On 8/29...

[Pippin]

A New Star in the Heavens... 8/29/07

And the one-year remembrance

the Angie video

 

these thoughts aren't new and original, but they're still true.

 

 

From my tribute post last year...

 

I never really believed in "heart dogs." Well, not for me, at least. That was for other folks, who were different from me. I was too jaded, too cautious, and had lost too many pets over the years. I knew better than to lose my heart to a dog.

 

As an added protection, I adopted a senior - retired brood who was over 10 years old. I knew that I wouldn't lose my heart over a dog that might only have a couple years left to share my life... it wasn't like the bonding you'd get if the hound had been with you for 10 years, or whatever. And she was a brood mama - a very independent, strong-minded lady who wasn't the least bit needy or velcro. Just what I wanted. Two independent women living together.

 

 

So I was safe, with my heart safely locked up, secure from canine capers.

 

 

That's what I thought, anyway. I had myself pretty convinced, actually.

 

 

Then I brought Angie home.

(snip)

 

We had 4 1/2 years together, and somewhere in that timeframe, she became entwined all through my heart and my mind. I watched her grow older, and wondered what it would be like when she was gone, and how I would go on.

 

We went for a wellness exam last year, and Doc said that if we just looked at her bloodwork, we'd think she was a 12yr old dog, not almost 15. Three weeks later I left her with Dee as I prepared to go out of town on a business trip.

 

Angie waited until I was safely away, and then let Doc and Dee know that she was ready to find that rainbow bridge she'd heard so much about.

 

It's been almost a year since she left me, eased to the bridge by her original foster-mom/dog-sitter and my favorite vet. And I still cry over her loss. But step by step, moment by moment, I go on. I see her face, her traits, in other greys. and I smile, remembering the love I got from an independent brood mama who learned to open her own heart, and taught me to do the same.

 

And the first words that I found to express my loss, 2 days after she left....

 

Angie came into my life when I went to Dee's house to adopt a black retired broodmama. As Dee was introducing me to the other dogs, she said "This one's Angela." Angie got off her dog-bed and walked over to me. I knelt down, and she looked deep into my eyes. Then she licked my chin, and went back to her dog-bed where she stayed the rest of the time I was there.

 

I met the dog that I had gone to adopt, and she was wonderful, but she wasn't the one for me. I had already been chosen. Angie chose me when she licked my chin.

 

 

Because she chose me,

I have experienced the adaptability of an "old" dog as she learned new tricks.

 

Because she chose me,

I have learned how much love I can feel for another being.

 

Because she chose me,

I have experienced the joy of her behavior changing over the years

from aloof to affectionate.

 

Because she loved me,

she adapted to unstructured routines and routine absences.

 

Because she loved me,

she accepted the other dogs I brought into our home,

and let them share the space in my heart.

 

Because I loved her,

there were new beds at Christmas, and no walks longer than her aging legs could handle.

 

Because I loved her,

there were nights spent on the couch with interruptions every few hours.

 

Because I loved her,

there were home-cooked meals and special treats, and fewer nights away from home.

 

Because she loved me,

she stood up for me, balancing on tired legs to show me she was ok

and I could leave on my business trip with a clear conscience.

 

Because I loved her, I let her go.

 

My heart is breaking

because I couldn't be there at the end, but it was time to let go,

and I had promised her I would,

because I loved her.

 

And because I loved her and she loved me,

she will run forever in my heart,

Because she chose me.

 

-mvy 9/1/07-

 

 

 

 

 

 

You're still the best greyhound friend a gal could ever have, little girl. Thanks so much for choosing me.

[macoduck]

So beautiful................

[Guest MAXNAV]

Aw. I know how you feel. My guy Max left me way too soon. We only had him a little over 5 years. It'll be 3 years in Dec., and I still think about him every day. He was my heart.

[Guest ss556]

Hugs to you. Beautiful Angie - you were loved, continue to run free. I hope you have met Alan - the two of you look so much alike.

[CaliforniaGreys]

[Guest greytful4]

That was an absolutely beautiful tribute to your beautiful girl ! I know how much you must miss her..

[Batmom]

Angie baby ....

 

So good to see her face, Mary.

 

Hugs to you in your time of remembrance.

[Guest 3greysinPA]

[Guest PhillyPups]

Mary,

 

You have me crying with you

 

I know of what you speak, the ache till we meet them again - the missing of all their little quirks - these Mama Girls sure are something eh?

 

Run with the angels Angie - you are truly loved

 

Pat -

[Hawthorn]

Beautiful ...

[galgrey]

[Pippin]

shamelessly stolen from Lexi's thread...

 

 

 

"When you look up at the sky at night, since I'll be living on one of them, since I'll be laughing on one of them, for you, it'll be as if all the stars are laughing. You'll have stars that can laugh!

 

"And when you're consoled (everyone is eventually consoled), you'll be glad you've known me. You'll always be my friend. You'll feel like laughing with me. And you'll open your windows sometimes just for the fun of it... And your friends will be amazed to see you laughing while you're looking up at the sky. Then you'll tell them, 'Yes, it's the stars. They always make me laugh!"

 

While I take the time to honor her memory, and while the honoring of her memory brings tears, I'm not sad. I had the perfect first greyhound, and I had her in my life for 4 1/2 years. That's twice as long as some say it should have been, depending on how long you think their lifespan is (I say 12-14, others say 10-12).

 

The tears indicate the depth of my love. The heart-pain is healed, and has been for awhile. Thinking of her brings fond smiles, not pain.