Loss Of Charlie's Sister, Possible Separation Anxiety

[Guest Danileigh91]

Hi Everyone,

 

I'll start at the beginning. We got our first Greyhound, Charlie, about 4 years ago. At the time we were living in an apartment, and he had some separation anxiety. He never tore anything up, but he would cry and cry overtime we left. About 6 months later, we got Girly. And Charlie did a lot better. Still a very whiny dog, but our neighbors in the apartment complex stopped complaining. The two didn't get along great. Charlie is really playful, and Girly was a super diva. But they never fought. Girly just had space issues with other dogs and would bark at Charlie every time he tried to lay down with her. We eventually moved into a house with a backyard. And the two liked to run around together.

 

Fast forward 3 years: We had to put Girly down because she had cancer. This was about 3 weeks ago. I don't think Charlie is handling it well at all. He is more whinny then he has ever been. And he started having accidents at night. Just a couple hours after I have let him out. And there's a lot of times I go to let him out, and he refuses to go out. And a lot of the time when he goes out he just stands at the door, like he's waiting for Girly to go out with him.

 

The accidents at night have been the worse. He never really had accidents. I'm not sure what to do. Last night I got a Kong for him and stuffed it with treats. Let him outside around 11:30 then went to bed. When my husband got home around 5:00 this morning, Charlie had peed and pooped in the house. This has been pretty much every night this week. I'm not sure what to do. It's not the right time for us to adopt another dog.

 

Any advice you have would be great.

[MaryJane]

I had a similar occurrence with my younger dog when my oldest left - he didn't have accidents however, he was just so lost and unsettled. I found that what worked for us was just taking some long slow walks to give him some quality time. I also had an older girl so he still had company, he just missed my older dog.

 

I also suggest going out with him when you let him out to make sure he does what he needs to.

[mychip1]

Too bad you can't adopt another....I agree about giving him as much quality time as you can.

[PatricksMom]

Welcome and hugs all around, how hard.

 

I'm not sure what the barrier is to adoption, but if it's finances or the ability to commit long-term or if it's emotionally too soon, could you foster?

[Guest fannysmom]

Poor fella. Did he see her die or see her immediately after? I'm told this is the best way to do it because the dog needs to see the body to know she died. If that's not what happened he may be an emotional wreck right now? not knowing what happened to her and literally wondering where the heck she went.

[greysmom]

He's grieving and missing his sister, and he's probably pretty lost right now, the same as you. He's probably also lonely and scared. Give him as much quality one-on-one time as you can - going on walks together, play time in the yard with him, special trips for a nise treat or to go to a dog-friendly store, arranging play dates with other greyhound friends. This will give you time together and also help tire him out.

 

I would also NOT leave him free in the house at night. Keep him in your bedroom so you can hear him if he gets restless and needs to go out. You might also try some jammies for him if he's getting chilly at night - it wakes him up and he has to go. Make sure he's actually doing his business when you put him out in the yard. He may be having trouble if he was always following his sister and going after her.

 

If he escalates his behavior, or it goes on too long, talk with your vet about a short course of anti anxiety medication.

 

I'm sorry you lost your girl. Cancer sucks.

[Sundrop]

So sorry for your loss, it's never easy.

 

In addition to spending as much time with him as possible and playdates as others have mentioned, do you have any good doggie daycares near that you could use? After we lost our Tilly last year, we weren't ready to adopt again as we had lost 2 in 10 months and it was just too much for us. But we had adopted again in between and our new boy was having a lot of panic, anxiety and confusion. We were able to take him to a great doggie daycare for half days a couple times per week and that seemed to help him a bit (if nothing else, it did tire him out!).

 

Also, I wouldn't rule out having a vet check him to make sure nothing is physically wrong.

 

Good luck to you both.

[sobesmom]

I don't actually believe that dogs grieve like people do, but I do think some dogs with SA only do better when they have another dog. My Sobe was one of them. We worked on his SA for months, then we got a foster, and it went away. We kept a parade of fosters for him. He never really bonded with any dog, even the one we adopted, but he was fine as long as there was another dog in the house for him to ignore. I loved having fosters, but honestly it was partly selfish to keep my dog OK.

 

Some dogs just can't be only dogs IMHO. Others will disagree. They might be right, but I just couldn't figure out how to "fix" Sobe, other than give him a companion.

 

I'm not suggesting your dog is the same as mine, or trying to give you advice. Just sharing my experience with one specific dog. Best of luck to you, and I'm so sorry for your loss. It's so hard.