A man sees a sign outside a house - 'Talking Greyhound For Sale.' He rings the doorbell, the owner appears and tells him the dog can be viewed in the back yard.
The man sees a very nice looking Greyhound laying there on a lounge.
"Do you really talk?" he asks the Greyhound.
"Yes," the Greyhound replies.
After recovering from the shock of hearing the Greyhound talk, the man asks, "So, tell me your story."
The Greyhound looks up and says, "Well, I discovered that I could talk when I was pretty young. I wanted to help the government, so I told the CIA.
In no time at all they had me jetting from country to country, sitting in rooms with spies and world leaders, because no one imagined that a Greyhound would be eavesdropping.
I was one of their most valuable spies for eight years.
But the jetting around really tired me out, and I knew I wasn't getting any younger so I decided to settle down. I signed up for a job at JFK to do some undercover security work, wandering near suspicious characters and listening in. I uncovered some incredible dealings and was awarded several medals. I got married, had a few puppies, and now I've just retired."
The man is amazed.
He goes back into the house and asks the owner how much he wants for the Greyhound.
"Ten dollars" the owner says.
"$10.00? But this Greyhound is absolutely amazing! Why on earth are you selling him so cheaply?"
"Because he's a lying b***ard. He's never been off that lounge in the back yard!!"