Pippin Posted January 4, 2004 Share Posted January 4, 2004 (edited) January 4, 1930.... a cold wintry ohio day, I'm sure... a baby girl was born to an alcoholic mother and a coal-miner father. The first of 3, she had a hard life, and never felt loved by her mother. She spent her entire life looking for her mommy's approval. Her father died of TB. In this woman's veins ran the blood of Charlemagne, as well as of her circuit-riding great-grandfather, who had the honor of guarding Lincoln's body when it lay in state in Columbus, on its way to burial in Illinois. But her childhood belied her heritage, and she left home and married at 18, a high-school dropout. Her early years shaped her perspectives on life, as they tend to do, but they did not trap her. She rose above the poverty, and the alcohol, and the abuse. They shaped her, but they did not define her. (to get an idea of her early years, watch the movie "Coal Miner's Daughter" - I took Mom to see that, and she said it was like watching her childhood) She had the strength to leave her first husband, when he decided she made a good punching bag, and when she wound up pregnant from her live-in boyfriend, she was perfectly willing to raise the child on her own, without remarrying. Her boyfriend's wishes won out, however, and mom and dad were married in Oct of 1954, with my brother being born the following March. She had six pregnancies in as many years, with four children surviving to adulthood (one miscarriage, one crib death). As has been said elsewhere, all of her children graduated high school, and all of them knew that Mom would be there for them if they needed her. Her oldest daughter followed the family tradition, with a pregnancy that led to marriage, in the same year that my dad had his stroke. Mom was dealing with her concerns about dad's health at the same time that she was dealing with becoming a grandmother. Dad is still going strong, almost 30 years after he was supposed to have died, and that first grandson is 26 years old now, and starting a program at a local technical college. She did not have an easy life, but she would not have expected life to be easy. In an era of two-parent families, she was an ersatz single mother, because Dad was a truck driver, and on the road 70 hours a week (or more). Even so, she was present in our lives, leading our scout troops, walking us to church every sunday, and walking my brother to high school when he kept trying to play hooky. She survived more than I've even experienced, and more than I want to experience. She kept going through things that would have lead many folks to just sit down and give up. If I can become one-half the woman she was, with one-fourth the strength, I will consider myself lucky. Dec 12, 2003. A cold wintry Ohio night, I'm sure. She settled herself to sleep in her recliner (she could breathe easier there than in bed - something about smoking for 50+ years), and fell asleep. When she woke up, she was no longer in any pain from arthritis, and didn't have to cough and choke all the crap out of her lungs in order to breathe. When dad found her, he thought she was sleeping, because she looked peaceful, with a half-smile on her face. So he let her sleep, until he realized it was almost noon and she'd not gotten up yet. As he went to wake her, he realized that she wouldn't wake up here, ever again. I find very little comfort, right now, in the knowledge that she knew how highly I regarded her, and how proud I was of her. I'd give anything to have her back again, so I could call her on the 4th and sing happy birthday to her just one more time. i love you, mommy... thanks for being who you were, and helping make me who I am. Edited January 4, 2004 by gabc Quote Mary Semper Fi, Dad - I miss you. Remembering Carla Benoist, a Greyhound/Pibble's bestest friend, Princess Zoe Brick-Butt, the little IG with the huge impact on hearts around the world - Miz Foxy - Greyhound Trish - Batman, the Roman-nosed Gentleman - Profile, the Handsome Man - Hunky the Hunkalicious - Jeany the Beautiful Lady- Zema, the most beautiful girl in the world - Jessie, the lovable nuisance - and my 3 Greys: my Angie-girl, my Casey-girl, and The Majestic Pippin, running forever in my heart. (I will always love you and miss you,my friends) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
grey14me Posted January 4, 2004 Share Posted January 4, 2004 That is a beautiful tribute...I'm so sorry for your loss Quote Michelle...forever missing her girls, Holly 5/22/99-9/13/10 and Bailey 8/1/93-7/11/05 Religion is the smile on a dog...Edie Brickell Wag more, bark less :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patricia Posted January 4, 2004 Share Posted January 4, 2004 Our Moms are both looking down upon us. Quote Patti-Mommy of Lady Sophia 7-28-92 - 8-3-04... LaceyLaine 8-2-94-12-5-07... Flash Gordon 7-14-99 - 8-29-09... BrookLynne...Pavé Maria... and 18 Bridge Kids. WATCHING OVER US~SOPHIA~QUEENIE~LACEY LAINE~ CODY ANGELO~FLASH GORDON. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest lisaluvsgreys Posted January 4, 2004 Share Posted January 4, 2004 God Bless you and your Mother! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Batmom Posted January 4, 2004 Share Posted January 4, 2004 I'll bet she's watching even now, to make sure her kids don't play hooky from anything they're supposed to do. Godspeed, Mary's mom. Quote Star aka Starz Ovation (Ronco x Oneco Maggie*, litter #48538), Coco aka Low Key (Kiowa Mon Manny x Party Hardy, litter # 59881), and mom in IllinoisWe miss Reko Batman (Trouper Zeke x Marque Louisiana), 11/15/95-6/29/06, Rocco the thistledown whippet, 04/29/93-10/14/08, Reko Zema (Mo Kick x Reko Princess), 8/16/98-4/18/10, the most beautiful girl in the whole USA, my good egg Joseph aka Won by a Nose (Oneco Cufflink x Buy Back), 09/22/2003-03/01/2013, and our gentle sweet Gidget (Digitizer, Dodgem by Design x Sobe Mulberry), 1/29/2006-11/22/2014, gone much too soon. Never forgetting CJC's Buckshot, 1/2/07-10/25/10. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pippin Posted January 4, 2004 Author Share Posted January 4, 2004 I'll bet she's watching even now, to make sure her kids don't play hooky from anything they're supposed to do. Godspeed, Mary's mom. I bet she is, too, which might be why I was finally able to write her a birthday message. I'll post a photo, at some point, maybe. I just remembered... she's had several dogs and cats over the years since I've left home. I'd forgotten about them, but it's nice to think that she was met at the bridge by them, as well as by her friends and other family. better yet, it seems that I'm finally able to cry, since writing that. Quote Mary Semper Fi, Dad - I miss you. Remembering Carla Benoist, a Greyhound/Pibble's bestest friend, Princess Zoe Brick-Butt, the little IG with the huge impact on hearts around the world - Miz Foxy - Greyhound Trish - Batman, the Roman-nosed Gentleman - Profile, the Handsome Man - Hunky the Hunkalicious - Jeany the Beautiful Lady- Zema, the most beautiful girl in the world - Jessie, the lovable nuisance - and my 3 Greys: my Angie-girl, my Casey-girl, and The Majestic Pippin, running forever in my heart. (I will always love you and miss you,my friends) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest mleg2001 Posted January 4, 2004 Share Posted January 4, 2004 A beautiful tribute to your mom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
greyhoundlov Posted January 4, 2004 Share Posted January 4, 2004 I lost my mom 2 years ago. Thank you for writing for paying such beautiful homage to yours. Quote Mary in Houston Everyone has a photographic memory, but not everyone has film. LAND OF THE FREE BECAUSE OF THE BRAVE Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest BrockGusDad Posted January 4, 2004 Share Posted January 4, 2004 A beautiful tribute to a beautiful "lady." You were blessed to have known her..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pippin Posted January 4, 2004 Author Share Posted January 4, 2004 Our Moms are both looking down upon us. yes, they are... and rejoicing in what they see, i'm sure. Quote Mary Semper Fi, Dad - I miss you. Remembering Carla Benoist, a Greyhound/Pibble's bestest friend, Princess Zoe Brick-Butt, the little IG with the huge impact on hearts around the world - Miz Foxy - Greyhound Trish - Batman, the Roman-nosed Gentleman - Profile, the Handsome Man - Hunky the Hunkalicious - Jeany the Beautiful Lady- Zema, the most beautiful girl in the world - Jessie, the lovable nuisance - and my 3 Greys: my Angie-girl, my Casey-girl, and The Majestic Pippin, running forever in my heart. (I will always love you and miss you,my friends) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest KaseysMom Posted January 4, 2004 Share Posted January 4, 2004 I am so sorry. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tory Posted January 4, 2004 Share Posted January 4, 2004 Mary you are doing so well ((hugs)) Happy Birthday Mary's mom Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest argolola Posted January 4, 2004 Share Posted January 4, 2004 God bless you, Mary. What a wonderful tribute to your mom. I pray that you will find comfort in the happy memories of her and the positive impact she made on your life. Although I still have my mom, both of my children died in the 1980s. It will always hurt, but in time you will be able to look back and smile. Hang in there. We are here for you. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zoolady Posted January 4, 2004 Share Posted January 4, 2004 I'm so sorry for your loss. I lost my parents nine days apart ten years ago and although it does get better, it still seems like yesterday. There's just something different when you lose your mother. I found the old saying, "You never become a woman until you lose your mom" to ring very true. So many perspectives change. Again, my deepest condolences. Quote Alice (missing 12/7/05), Wonder and Ben And our beloved Bridge Kids... Inky, Maui, Murphy, Ragamuffin, Della and Natalie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Burpdog Posted January 4, 2004 Share Posted January 4, 2004 Thanks for sharing My Mom's been gone 7 1/2 years and even now, every once in awhile, I think "I'll call her". Then I remember and think "really long distance", don't think so Although is gets easier on a day to day basis, nothing ever fills the void of not having Mom here. Quote Diane & The Senior Gang Burpdog Biscuits Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Becki Posted January 4, 2004 Share Posted January 4, 2004 I am so sorry. That is such a beautiful tribute Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest DeweytheGreyt Posted January 4, 2004 Share Posted January 4, 2004 What a wonderful story. Thank you for sharing her story with us. I feel for your loss. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RSS Posted January 4, 2004 Share Posted January 4, 2004 Quote RSS Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
silverfish Posted January 4, 2004 Share Posted January 4, 2004 Your Mom might have looked in vain for approval from her own mother, but she knew she had it from you Quote The plural of anecdote is not dataBrambleberry Greyhounds My Etsy Shop Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest shirley Posted January 4, 2004 Share Posted January 4, 2004 That was such a beautiful tribute to your mother. I remember watching the Coal Miners Daughter many years ago and thinking then what a hard way to have to grow up. Your mother must have have been a very strong lady and she would have been very proud to have you for a daughter. I am sorry you cannot be with her on her birthday but I am sure she is looking down on you smiling. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest auntiesara Posted January 5, 2004 Share Posted January 5, 2004 Your story brought tears to my eyes. I'm sure her darling pets have been reunited with her ..... Sara Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.