She Just Walks All Over Him, And He Lets Her

[Guest SaddleWags]

Coen breaks my heart. He lets his little sister do what ever she may. So typical that the little sister wants what ever her brother has, even if she has EXACTLY the same thing.

 

When ever we give our pups bully sticks, without fail, within 10 minutes, Edie has left her treat behind, has quietly walked over to Coen, who is minding his own business, chewing away at his treat. She lackadaisically lays down beside him...she doesn't look at him, she studies the grass, hangs out for a bit...

 

Then wham, she snags his bully and he's left with nothing.

 

Sometimes when we see it happen, we'll go get the treat from Edie and give it back to Coen, but sure enough, she does it again.

 

We've even given her the bigger one...but no, that doesn't appeal to her, because it's not what her brother has.

 

Do we just ignore it? Can you teach a dog to stand up for himself...or do we just accept the fact that he's a pushover...and his little sister is selfish?

 

Gosh I love em to pieces.

[kamsmom]

Your title made me laugh out loud ... in a short answer, yes, most females are selfish At least I like to be sometimes

 

I really don't know the answer to your issue, I have one that just goes with the flow and allows the other dogs to push her around. I typically just stay in the room with them while they have treats to ensure that she gets to have hers.

[greytpups]

Dogs like structure in their pack...they're more comfortable with order...sounds like they've worked it out between them. If you take the bully stick, you established yourself as the leader because you distribute the food. I would step in if someone was going to get hurt, but I try not to disrupt the established order, generally speaking.

[TheFullHouse]

I'd pick up hers and give it to him. If she has an issue with that then I'd separate them when giving treats. Although he puts up with it now, there may come the day when he gets tired of it and fights back. You just can never tell, at least with my pack anyway so I just give everyone their special treats in separate areas. When one is finished I send them someplace else until the others are finished.

[Guest weycoolgrey]

Wow - it's almost like I could have written this post, but about my Dewey and Daisy. We generally let them work it out, unless teeth-baring and/or growling ensues from either of them. If it is a really special treat though, we will make sure Dewey is able to keep his by seperating them or sternly telling Daisy "No" when she goes over to take Dewey's.

[Guest Spencers_Greyt]

Sounds like typical female/male dog behavior. In the Greyhound's world, the female is always alpha and the male the beta. I'm sure Coen is just fine with this structure since there's no fighting or growling. If you want to give him a bully stick and not worry about Edie snatching it then give him his bully stick in his crate or in a room blocked off from Edie. In my house, Emmy, my non-Grey is alpha and then comes Spencer and Buzz is at the bottom of the pack. Spencer will allow Emmy to eat his food but he will not let Buzz close while he's eating. I think things are fine with your 2.

[Guest TBSFlame]

I just don't allow it. I can control them with just saying their name. Riley is a slow eater and they will circle around her and just watch her. I am the food police and if one takes a step I will just call their name and they know not to touch her bowl. I must watch or they will get it. )

[Hawthorn]

In our house it's the other way round. Sunny is the boss and Sophie defers to him all the time. That said, I don't let Sunny take her food or treats. They have their own designated treat-receiving areas in different parts of the house, which they voluntarily run to whenever there's a treat on offer, plus I supervise them until they've both finished. If it's a longer lasting treat I separate them with a babygate so they can enjoy their treats in peace. I think Sunny understands now that he's not allowed to take Sophie's treats and rarely tries these days, but I expect he would if I weren't around!

[Guest Greyt_dog_lover]

Sounds like typical female/male dog behavior. In the Greyhound's world, the female is always alpha and the male the beta. I'm sure Coen is just fine with this structure since there's no fighting or growling. If you want to give him a bully stick and not worry about Edie snatching it then give him his bully stick in his crate or in a room blocked off from Edie. In my house, Emmy, my non-Grey is alpha and then comes Spencer and Buzz is at the bottom of the pack. Spencer will allow Emmy to eat his food but he will not let Buzz close while he's eating. I think things are fine with your 2.

 

 

Really, would you be so kind as to tell my boy Bart this as he didnt get the memo...

[Batmom]

I'd pick up hers and give it to him. If she has an issue with that then I'd separate them when giving treats. Although he puts up with it now, there may come the day when he gets tired of it and fights back. You just can never tell, at least with my pack anyway so I just give everyone their special treats in separate areas. When one is finished I send them someplace else until the others are finished.

 

What Judy said. He might never care, but then he might. (BTDT, paid the vet bill ....)

 

When we do any food items here that last more than 30 seconds, I put the pups on either side of a gate so I don't have to police them.

[Guest queenme2]

I have a similar problem except its my Grey Nina and my female cat. My female cat likes to take over Nina's bed and leaves Nina the cold floor. And it ticks me off seeing this tiny White Cat take over this huge bed to leave Nina in the cold. I'll remove the cat and place a treat for Nina on the bed and Nina will take the treat off the bed and go to the floor. Then lets the cat return to the bed !! This happens a few times a week. I don't want Nina to eat the cat but I don't want her to be railroaded either

[Guest Sweetreba]

My Reba does the same thing to Petey. I felt so bad for him. Even if they were in their crates all she had to do was a quick low growl and he would stop eating and lay down and not touch his treat even though she could not get it. It was like she said no I can't have this so I guess I have to leave it.

 

I was reading about dogs and their pack and it told about the order of the pack and how the top dog got the best and most of everything and always ate first etc. The thing that struck me the most is that as long as they know where they are in the pack they are happy with the way it is, and even the lowest member is happy as long as he knows where he is in the pack. Now I could care less. Petey is not as food motivated as Reba but when she is not around I will slip him a goodie like a piece of meat or something really good. She likes to gnaw on chewy things and he doesn't so those things are not a problem. Now its been over a year and I notice if I say no to her she will leave him alone and if he doesn't want it she gets it anyway. I feed them in seperate rooms cause if she looks at him the wrong way he will leave his dish. The rest of the time they play and love each other.

[gryhnd_adoptee]

I have two girls and Tessie is the bully so to say. They will both get something, and Tessie will walk right over to Kare Bear and take hers away. Kare Bear just looks at Tessie and walks away. This happens with "everything". Tessie is like a spoiled rotten, selfish two year old child!! There is a whole basket of toys, but if Karey goes to take one, Tessie is up right away to take it from her. They can also have 4 chewies on the floor...nobody bothers with any of them...but you let Karey wander over and look at one, and Tessie is right there to take it away.

 

It's actually comical to watch. I always get on Tessie for it, and she just gives me sad eyes and walks away....until I turn my back on her, and she's right back at it again.

[inugrey]

I'd pick up hers and give it to him. If she has an issue with that then I'd separate them when giving treats. Although he puts up with it now, there may come the day when he gets tired of it and fights back. You just can never tell, at least with my pack anyway so I just give everyone their special treats in separate areas. When one is finished I send them someplace else until the others are finished.

 

I would listen to a woman who manages a sizeable pack and doesn't have issues with pack altercations. She knows what she's talkin' about.

 

 

I feel the need to also interject that it's not a sex of the dog thing. Some dogs have strong personalities some don't, like the previous poster said they just like to know where pack order is. I've met many a bossy boy and many a shy submissive female. I feel likes girls have a bad rap unnecessarily. I'll happy host an evening at my house for a good view of the opposite of what you describe.

[Guest SaddleWags]

Well then it sounds like things are the way they should be. If he's happy, then I'm happy.

 

Even though after I've come in the room, after Edie has taken his bully stick, he looks up at me with those sad eyes, as if to say, "My stick thing got taken".

 

...poor poor fella.

[Guest burgerandfrey]

That's just the opposite of our house. Our boy Zeke bullies our much smaller girl Lola. Overall they get along well, stick close to each other, and nuzzle each other affectionately. But Zeke has a funny thing about wanting the bed closest to wherever my wife and I are. If Lola is on that bed Zeke will sometimes stand over her until she moves. Or if she has a toy he wants he will just stand over her until she lets him take it. There is no snarking, growling, or baring of teeth... he just stands over her and she gives him whatever he wants. Of course we knew Zeke was a bit of an alpha boy when we adopted Lola. She is small even for a female and seems completely willing to be the submissive one in the relationship. She will even bring Zeke's favorite ball to him sometimes without being prompted! Other times she will sneak up and grab his ball and run away hoping he will chase her. Then she runs and hides behind one of us. that's the funny thing about Lola. She may be submissive, but she has her moments when she defies Zeke or even messes with him.

 

Of course it all depends on the dog. Our previous greyhound was a 78-pound female who was more muscular than our boy Zeke...and she was way more alpha dog than he is. If she were still around he would just be her submissive little boy-toy instead of the bully he tries to be

[greytpups]

Well then it sounds like things are the way they should be. If he's happy, then I'm happy.

 

Even though after I've come in the room, after Edie has taken his bully stick, he looks up at me with those sad eyes, as if to say, "My stick thing got taken".

 

...poor poor fella.

 

You may want to consider supervising them until the treat is finished though. I let my pups work it out amongst themselves as I mentioned earlier, but I'm still in the room watching them...just in case. And my pups are incredibly gentle, but I always supervise when food is involved just to make sure they don't choke, etc.

[TheFullHouse]

Yes, I agree. I would supervise during meals and treats. More fights happen between dogs over food, high value treats and toys.

 

I would also replace whatever treat he has that has been taken away with another, either her treat that she's dropped or a new one. My fear is that as some point he will get frustrated and fight back for his treat.

[fourofem]

With five, I don't do bully sticks (or anything like them) at all. Lizzie would be the first to give hers up if one of the others even looked at her and eventually, there would be trouble between House and Kevin so I just don't set myself, or them, up for that. I don't even do toys unless I'm right there with them and can run interference, if needed. House wants whatever the others have even though he has the very same thing.