When Does It Stop Hurting So Much?

[Fudge]

Jen, my heart goes out to you hearing your sorrow. There is nothing I could say to make things better for you.

Just know that you can share your sorrow here....we will listen.

[crazygang]

I still well up sometimes even now.........there's no time limit on grief.

 

Lost my precious girlies Tess 4 years ago, Patsy 2 years and Rosie 9 years ago (this Friday coming).

 

 

 

There's always someone to talk to here on GT that understands.....

[Guest slimcilla]

I am gonna say something horrid here. It may seem that as I don't know you I am being cruel but I hope you understand where I am coming from..

 

My advice would be to get rid of everything that was his, there are plenty of rescue places that are totally desperate for leads, collars, coats, bedding, food etc and it will make you feel better.. You won't have to see it any more and the hound charity will benefit...

 

I have lost countless cats and last year I lost a beautiful Saluki puppy well before his time. My first horrid chore has always been to remove all the departed beasties belongings and stop myself being reminded. That doesn't mean you have to forget - he was part of your life but if and when you get another dog you don't (in my rubbish opinion) want to use the same stuff again as it will "taint" the new dog's start in you home..

 

He was very special so remember his little foibles and laugh and be glad you had that time - it makes you a very special person being adored by a dog and you made his life wonderful for the time you were together. You did love him enough, you gave him a home when he needed one. Maybe you think didn't walk/cuddle/talk to him enough but I am sure he would rather have had you as a best mate than anyone else!

 

Sorry - your post made me sob and this is just how I dealt with my grief. Even though I knew I could use the puppies collars etc. on Speedy I donated them to a Greyhound charity auction and was proud of how much they raised for dogs in need of homes..

 

I lost the Puppy 18 months ago and finally got another 2nd dog 2 months ago. It's not perfect yet but I am not reminded of the puppy when I see new Greyhound Sparkie. I even got rid of the slicker brush and garden fork he chewed after finding them in the garage recently..

 

Different people deal with it in different ways - I met a Greyhound owner recently that lost her 2 Greys on the same day as they crashed into each other while running at high speed - 3 days later she had 2 new Greyhounds and has never looked back. That's not my way but it's hers and worked for her..

 

I don't want to make you sob but it's also part of the process - It does get easier! You just (?) have to find your way of making it easier for you..

 

Hugs!

 

CC xx

[grey14me]

[Guest jerrybird]

I've grieved for him for over a year now. I am only just beginning to remember the favorite places and things with a smile and not a tear. I couldn't wash the slipcovers on my sofas for fear that I would lose his scent until today. I don't want to forget.

[Sirocco_Nikki]

My Chester has been gone 10 years now and Polly has been gone about 9. At first, even breathing hurt. Give yourself time. There is no one right way to grieve. Different people have different needs. Sometimes one person will follow a different process for different animals. For me, I kept Polly and Chester's collars / tags and bowls. My mom, who doesn't like dogs, recently bought a cement dog that had angel wings because "it looked like Chester". Chester is now sitting on my front porch wearing the original Chester's collar and tags. I smile every time I see him.

[Guest tammymacb]

I can't stop crying. Sitting in my bed, right now, with Keena's ashes in a carved box on my nighttable. I rub the box and tell her how much I miss her. How much I love her.

 

I've never cried like this for anyone or anything in my life.

 

I'm angry at my vet. If he'd done a decent dental in January, she wouldn't have been on back in July. I'm angry at myself. It was an elective procedure. She didn't NEED to be there that day. I'm angry at my husband. I asked him to let her sleep with us before the surgery. He said I was being "silly" and she would be fine.

 

I don't know when it will stop. I can't imagine not missing her every day for the rest of my life. I loved my girl with all that I had, and she should be here with me right now....Why was she taken away?

[KF_in_Georgia]

I can't stop crying. Sitting in my bed, right now, with Keena's ashes in a carved box on my nighttable. I rub the box and tell her how much I miss her. How much I love her.

 

I've never cried like this for anyone or anything in my life.

 

I'm angry at my vet. If he'd done a decent dental in January, she wouldn't have been on back in July. I'm angry at myself. It was an elective procedure. She didn't NEED to be there that day. I'm angry at my husband. I asked him to let her sleep with us before the surgery. He said I was being "silly" and she would be fine.

 

I don't know when it will stop. I can't imagine not missing her every day for the rest of my life. I loved my girl with all that I had, and she should be here with me right now....Why was she taken away?

 

Tammy, I know you're grieving, but please don't second-guess yourself. If Keena had had the dental in January, you might have lost her then. And it wasn't really elective: she needed the work--needed it in January, needed it in July; the longer it was postponed, the greater risk that she'd develop some nasty infection through her gums.

 

And your husband: poor guy wouldn't let himself even think that something would go wrong. Letting her sleep with you would have been admitting that there was something to worry about.

 

 

We don't have our darlings nearly long enough. And when we lose them--whether they die of disease, die unexpectedly in "elective" surgery, die unexpectedly in "life-saving" surgery, or die in a tragic accident--none of those deaths is better or less painful (to us) than another.

[Valencia]

It's been 3 and a half months since Sydney Sue left, us, and I still cry now and then. It's easier than it was a month ago, but I still can't bear to put away her collars or her jammies. Some day.

[BootsyCollins]

I still cry anytime I think about Argos, and he died in November. I don't know when it stops hurting.

 

[Bill419]

It's never easy. You just have to think of all the good things. Susie died May 2006 after being with us for 14 months. Because of her kidney disease we had to be careful of the treats she got. Her favorite was marshmellows. I've only recently started to bring marshmellows into the house again. Tipper died Feb. 2008 and I still call the others Tipper even though Tucker is the only other black one. The only thing that helps with Ladybug who died July 2008 at 3 years old is that we adopted her sister Dancing Bug.