Stormy And Gracie

[Guest LadyChester]

I don't belong to a kitty forum so I decided I would post here even though my losses were not greys. I had to send my 13 year old kitty, Stormy, to the bridge on Sat, 10/13. Today I had to send my 14 year old, Gracie. Both were heart wrenching decisions.

 

Stormy hadn't been sick at all and I suddenly noticed a mass on her shoulder. It seemed to come out of nowhere. Maybe I wasn't observant enough and missed it, I don't know. The doctor was pretty certain it was fibrosarcoma. Whatever it was it appeared that it had gotten into her bone already and she would have to have her front leg and scapula amputated. She was clearly in pain and I didn't want to put her through any more. She was my first and only kitten in my whole life. She was teeny tiny and fit easily in my palm when she came to me as a kitten. Someone dumped her and her brother, along with their dead mother, in a cardboard box. I was taking a walk one Sunday morning, and as I went past the box it meowed. She was a very, very sick kitten and I felt like her whole first year was spent at the vet. The vet didn't really give her a very good chance of making it. She had a tough beginning but became an incredibly spunky girl with the softest totoise colored fur. She was my little diva.

 

Gracie came to me about a month after Stormy and took the role of surrogate mom for Stormy; she was probably less than a year old at the time herself. She was left behind by her military family when they moved, which broke my heart. The neighbor told me she saw her periodically for months but she always ran from everyone. But still she hung around and ate out of trash cans and dumpsters. I couldn't tempt her with any variety kitty treats for the first 11 or 12 years I had her ... but order pizza or chinese, or buy a bag of potato chips, and she would come begging. Once a dumpster kitty, always a dumpster kitty, I guess :-)

 

Gracie found a forever home with me after she returned to the patio of her former home to have kittens. The neighbor lady took her and the kittens in as Gracie was so malnourished that she had almost no fur. The lady invited me over to meet the kittens to see if I'd adopt one, but I'd just found and adopted Stormy and had my hands full with one sick kitten. Another month or so went by and I ran into the woman again and she told me that all the kittens found homes, but that the mom wasn't doing well. She thought she'd take her to the shelter since she couldn't find anyone who wanted her and adult cats were tough to place, even when they weren't sick and emaciated. Of course I couldn't let that happen and she came to my house. For the first several years she was a total scaredy cat and hid whenever anyone except me was around. Eventually she blossomed into one of the sweetest, most beautiful calicos you've ever seen. She was one feisty broad, too, yet one of the most appreciative critters I've ever know.

 

Gracie seemed to be declining slowly since March. Her kidney values weren't great then and she'd been on prescription food for a couple of years. She was losing a lot of weight, drank constantly, lost interest in kitty treats the past few days, and seemed confused and uncomfortable. It wasn't any one thing but I looked at her yesterday and thought the sparkle was gone from her eyes. She seemed a bit restless last night, she was clingy (which she normally wasn't), and when I looked at her this morning I think she was trying to tell me it was time. I hope and pray it was the right thing and would give anything to know for sure. When I took her to the vet today she told me there were a few things she try to give her perhaps a few more months or maybe even a year. Maybe I should have done more, but when she first came to me she was also so sick, she spent so much time going to the vet for ages until we got her healthy. For the rest of her life she just worked herself into a total swivet whenever she had to go to the vet, needed to take medicine, I tried to clean her ears, or she required anything that involved being "fussed" with. Maybe I should have given her more time to be sure ... I don't know. She went to the bridge in my arms and didn't even get very upset about being at the vet's. I swear she purred with her last breath. Maybe it was just wishful thinking on my part.

 

Run free, girls ... Mom and Grandpa love you so much. Thank you for putting up with all of the greys, permanent and fosters, who came through our home, and for teaching them about kitties. Please give Lady, Judy, and Grandma a big hug from us. I hope you had a happy 13 years with me. I always tried to do the best for you and pray I made the right decisions for both of you.

 

I apologize that this is so rambling. I am having a hard time with this. I sent my first grey to the bridge in June and my favorite foster ever left last Friday. Thids is certainly the hard part of having and loving pets.

 

 

Edited October 18, 2007 by LadyChester

[MarcR]

I'm truly sorry. Don't second guess yourself.

[robinw]

i'm so sorry. as MarcR said, don't second guess yourself. you knew your kitties better than anyone else and would only do what was best for them

[Guest LadyChester]

Thank you so much. My heart is just in little pieces right now and I am just a mess. Maybe I'm having such a hard time because I'm feeling guilty and most of the time I can't even bring myself to read Remembrance because I just cry and cry. When I read Health and Medical it seems like so many greys I've read about for so long have gone to the bridge recently, and their people have gone through so much to keep their babies going.

Edited October 18, 2007 by LadyChester

[patricia]

I am so sorry. Your little girls are together again...they will always watch over you.

[Guest Pookie]

I'm sorry for the loss of your kitties It is clear that you loved them both very much and did what was best for them. They are together again now

[Guest bowiebears]

My sympathies are with you.

Letting them go is always hard, even when you know that is the best thing to do.

 

As others have said, you did what you knew to be best for them. No one can ask for more.

 

It's obvious that you loved them very deeply. Blessing on you for your compassion for these little furry creatures.

Love like that does not go unrewarded.

 

One day we will all be reunited at The Bridge.

 

--isaac

[GreyPoopon]

I'm so sorry.

 

You gave them 13 good years, and made the last decisions in their best interests. No one could ask for more.

[Guest vahoundlover]

I am so sorry

 

 

[Guest Tenderhearts]

I am so sorry for your profound losses!

 

God bless you for giving those two girls a loving home :grouphug :grouphug

[Guest argolola]

I'm so sorry. You will be in my prayers.

[Guest hamiesmom]

I am so sorry for your losses, truly. Don't second guess yourself, you gave them a wonderful, caring home. Just remember this, "they are the wind beneath your wings".

[Guest Becki]

I am so very sorry for your loss.

[BauersMom]

Oh Kim, I'm so sorry! I know how much you loved your kitties, and I have no doubt that you did the right by them.

 

Sending hugs.

[Guest SoulsMom]

I'm so sorry for your loss. Take peace in knowing you gave them a loving, happy home

[Guest Redpack]

I'm so sorry. And they're right, don't second guess...you did the best you knew how and you acted out of love, don't need to justify that to anyone...even yourself.

[Guest SusanP]

You did the right thing. It was a loving choice you made. Think of all the years of happiness and comfort you gave your little ones and be glad for that. I'm sorry for your loss.

[Batmom]

I'm so sorry. Of course you did the right thing.

 

Godspeed, little girls.

[turbotaina]

I'm so sorry for your recent losses. It must be so hard for you right now, but yes, you're right - it's all part of having and loving pets, isn't it? Take good care of yourself. :grouphug

[Wendie]

I'm so sorry :grouphug

[Guest whatahound]

I am so very sorry, please don't second quess yourself, that is the last most loving act we do for our beloved pets.

Godspeed Stormy and Gracie.

 

Hugs to you.

[Guest Aggie94]

I'm so so sorry.

[Guest yipee372]

I am sorry for your loss.

[Guest Enna]

I am so sorry.