Guest jenznaz Posted April 19, 2009 Share Posted April 19, 2009 I thought about posting this in Remembrance, but he's not gone yet, and maybe it would help someone else making decisions about mast cell tumor. Back in late September we took Naz in to look at a funny wound above his hock that just wouldn't heal up. Turned out to be a mast cell tumor, grade 2. We did surgery with Dr. Hyatt at Pender Vet. Due to the awkward location they couldn't get it all - incomplete margins. They gave him 5 months. I decided against chemo at that time. We wanted Naz to be able to be his happy self for whatever time he had left, and not be stressed at being shuttled back and forth to the vet for chemo treatments, etc. just to be given another year. I can't say I don't still think about this decision, but it felt right to us at the time. I had made his yearly check up appointment, excited that we could show the doctors how well he was doing, and then, ironically, last Sunday it came back. Just "poof" and there was a huge squishy lump in the same place. While waiting for our vet appointment we talked and talked about our worst case scenario, and the decision we were going to make. We knew in our hearts it couldn't be just a fatty deposit or something benign, though we wished. And it wasn't. Dr. Thorndike did the needle aspiration and it came back borderline Grade 3 this time. Sweet, wonderful Dr. Thorndike sat down in the floor with us and we talked. If we decided to do surgery again, then they'd have to do chest x-rays and tests first to see if it had spread, put him under for the surgery again, chemo, hope it doesn't come back.. She had lost her own grey a couple years earlier, and when she confessed she had waited too long to put him down we all just started sobbing. My baby is only 6, my first dog, my first greyhound. I love this dog in ways that I cannot describe in words, in ways I never thought I would feel for an animal. And I had to make the decision not to do the surgery. Most days I'm okay with it. I truly believe dogs live every day to the fullest; that guilt and regret are human emotions. That I did everything I could for him, and that he was loved and happy in this incarnation. We're all in the mind frame to enjoy and spoil him to the utmost every day. And when the cancer starts to take him over, when he's less "himself" and starts to lose weight, I will hold him while he goes to sleep forever. I just have to keep thinking: This was never going to be easy. If he lived to be 14 it would be just as painful as now. If we'd done multiple surgeries and chemo and other drugs, the cancer would still come back. I think I'm not dealing with this very well... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest koolaidnconner Posted April 19, 2009 Share Posted April 19, 2009 We are all here for you! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest jettcricket Posted April 19, 2009 Share Posted April 19, 2009 .....my heart goes out to you. I lost my heart dog, Jett, to mast cell cancer last year. Cherish the time that you have with your sweet baby. .....sending good thoughts that you have much more quality time together. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest suzq Posted April 19, 2009 Share Posted April 19, 2009 I hope you have much more time to make wonderful memories. I is NEVER easy. I'm so sorry! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest BlackandBrindle Posted April 19, 2009 Share Posted April 19, 2009 I'm so sorry We will never have enough time with them, ever. We love them too much for that. You made the right decision for you and Naz though. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CaliforniaGreys Posted April 19, 2009 Share Posted April 19, 2009 My heart goes out to you, none of us should ever have to be in this situation, nor should they. I am keeping you both tucked in my prayers Quote Missing my little Misty who took a huge piece of my heart with her on 5/2/09, and Ekko, on 6/28/12 For the sick, the lost, and the homeless Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
crazygang Posted April 19, 2009 Share Posted April 19, 2009 Don't let him pick up on your sadness dogs live for the now..........save you're grieving until - afterwards. God bless you all. Quote Run free our beloved Sir Snowy, Pip, Queenie, Sadie, Tess & Rosie until we meet again......I would rather feel the thorn than to never see the rose Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Greytluv Posted April 19, 2009 Share Posted April 19, 2009 Sending white light to Naz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest greydogluvr Posted April 19, 2009 Share Posted April 19, 2009 I am in a similiar situation right now. I am crying with you and know the pain you are feeling. Love him and cherish each moment. It is so unfair. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest EmilyAnne Posted April 19, 2009 Share Posted April 19, 2009 You right, no matter how old they are, it is still equally painful. My own 14 yr old has a carpal mast cell tumor. And it is so hard to know what is the right thing to do. Stupid cancer. You have the right attitude and we are here for you every step of the way. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fiona3 Posted April 19, 2009 Share Posted April 19, 2009 Jen, my heart goes out to you. We had a similar situation years ago with our grey Ms. Dylan. She had a mast cell tumor and was successfully treated. Three months passed - then one morning there was a new one on her gums in her mouth. We had to say goodbye to her that same day. She was 8 years old and it broke my heart. We lost Hobbes last year at the age of 14. He was with us for 11 years and came to our home with Ms. Dylan. I can honestly say it doesn't matter how long you have them - it is just as painful. Please know we all understand what you are going thru and our thoughts and prayers will be with you. Quote Hobbes - April 2, 1994 to April 9, 2008-----Tasha - May 23, 2000 to March 31, 2013 Fiona - Aug 29, 2001 to May 5, 2014-----Bailey - March 22, 2001 to Jan 20, 2015 Zeke - June 1, 2004 - Jan 26, 2016----Callie - July 14, 2006 to July 27, 2019 Forever in my heart: Chooch, Molly, Dylan & Lucy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RobinM Posted April 19, 2009 Share Posted April 19, 2009 Don't let him pick up on your sadness dogs live for the now..........save you're grieving until - afterwards. God bless you all. Agreed. I am so sorry, cherish the time yo uhave now. let him have everything he never would be allowed to have and celebrate his life. Quote ROBIN ~ Mom to: Beau Think It Aint, Chloe JC Allthewayhome, Teddy ICU Drunk Sailor, Elsie N Fracine , Ollie RG's Travertine, Ponch A's Jupiter~ Yoshi, Zoobie & Belle, the kitties. Waiting at the bridge Angel Polli Bohemian Ocean , Rocky, Blue,Sasha & Zoobie & Bobbi Greyhound Angels Adoption (GAA) The Lexus Project Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Houndmommy03 Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 Sending hugs to you and your pup. I am sorry you are going through this. Kim, Silver and Holly Quote <p>Kim and the hound - RumorMissing my angels Marlow, Silver, Holly and Lucky Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KF_in_Georgia Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 I'm so, so sorry to read this. We'll be here for you, and thinking of Naz and all of you. As awful as it is to have to make the decisions you've had to make, you're right that it was never going to be easier. I lost Oreo to a freak accident: I never had to make the hard decisions...but I didn't get a chance to say goodbye, either. All our losses are beyond-belief hard...which may be why so many of us are crying now for you and Naz. Quote Kathy and Q (CRT Qadeer from Fuzzy's Cannon and CRT Bonnie) and Jane (WW's Aunt Jane from Trent Lee and Aunt M); photos to come. Missing Silver (5.19.2005-10.27.2016), Tigger (4.5.2007-3.18.2016), darling Sam (5.10.2000-8.8.2013), Jacey-Kasey (5.19.2003-8.22.2011), and Oreo (1997-3.30.2006) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest greytful4 Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 Oh Jenn....... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Houndtime Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 No matter how long they stay, they never stay long enough. Make each day special for you and him. Create memories. I do hate cancer. Quote Irene Ullmann w/Flying Odin and Mama Mia in Lower Delaware Angels Brandy, John E, American Idol, Paul, Fuzzy and Shine Handcrafted Greyhound and Custom Clocks http://www.houndtime.com Zoom Doggies-Racing Coats for Racing Greyhounds Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest FrostyBottoms Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 I'm so sorry. Cancer sucks. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest arlosmom Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 I lost my first grey and my heart dog last September to intestinal cancer. We did no chemo or treatment and let him go two weeks after we knew when he wouldn't eat or go out one morning. Big hugs to you. You know you have done everything right. Cherish your time left. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest FreddyGirl Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 Spoil him, enjoy every moment, and remember, that you made the decision you felt best for Naz and your family. That is all you can do. Cancer does suck, too many wonderful dogs and their families suffer. Sending white light. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest ss556 Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 I'm so sorry for you. Hug and kiss him. No, it's not easy. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest NHgreys Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 one day at a time, each to the fullest Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest silverjen Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 Hugs, and cherish the time you have. I lost my heart dog at 13 to lung cancer... I had 9 days between her diagnosis and when it was clear to me the time has come to say goodbye. Those were the saddest days, but also the most peaceful I've ever had. I just stayed by her, and watched as she prepared for her journey. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest PiagetsMom Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 My baby is only 6, my first dog, my first greyhound. I love this dog in ways that I cannot describe in words, in ways I never thought I would feel for an animal. And I had to make the decision not to do the surgery. Most days I'm okay with it. I truly believe dogs live every day to the fullest; that guilt and regret are human emotions. That I did everything I could for him, and that he was loved and happy in this incarnation. We're all in the mind frame to enjoy and spoil him to the utmost every day. And when the cancer starts to take him over, when he's less "himself" and starts to lose weight, I will hold him while he goes to sleep forever. I just have to keep thinking: This was never going to be easy. If he lived to be 14 it would be just as painful as now. If we'd done multiple surgeries and chemo and other drugs, the cancer would still come back. I think I'm not dealing with this very well... I think you're being too hard on yourself and you're dealing with this very well. You're right...... this was never going to be easy. You make the best decisions and choices you can with the information you have for the pup that you know best and love......but, it's not always easy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest lynne893 Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 My heart breaks for you. Perhaps because I know I will be in the same circumstances with Timber someday, though perhaps due to different details. You are doing all of the right things and making the right choices for your baby. You ARE. Listen to your instincts. Love your hound to the fullest, as you are. That's all we can do for them, ever. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest IrskasMom Posted April 20, 2009 Share Posted April 20, 2009 I'm so sorry for you. Hug and kiss him. No, it's not easy. Susan knows all to well . Enjoy the time you have left Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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