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New Member, Old Greyhound


Guest jmsgreyhnd
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Guest jmsgreyhnd

Hello,

I am Must's Mom. Mustard has been with us since she was 3-1/2. She will be 15 on August 11.

This is unfortunately a late introduction. Mustard is old and fragile. I do not know how long she will be with us, but she is loved immensely.

Mustard grew up with my son: he was 7 when she came and 19 now. He keeps telling me it is my job to keep her alive till he graduates from college. I just want to keep her alive till he leaves for his sophomore year.

Mustard is a grand old lady. She is stubborn and elegant, feisty and lazy, fragile, yet still trying to climb the mountain behind my house.

I just came back from a vacation, having paid my son's friend and entrusted my son to help her. Her back legs don't always work well - she slips on floors and has trouble getting up. She sometimes stumbles on the one front step (although she didn't like the ramp I tried).

Mustard is quite dignified and HATES to be helped.

I have returned from vacation to find her even more fragile. My house smells like dog and who knows what. And teary-eyed, I help her to walk, drink and I clean her up.

She is almost ready for the bridge, but not quite. I believe in evaluating quality of life - but people also remind me that I must have that too. I am a social worker by profession, which makes me put her first. But I am burning out too.

It's almost time, but not yet. I guess I am asking for words of wisdom. What I have read tells me that this is a wonderful group.

Thank you for having us here.

jmsgreyhnd

judith

Must's mom.

Also mom to Alex the skinkid and Frisky, Lucky and Murphy the cats.

About to be mom to 3 new stepteens.

ACK!

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While I am happy that you found GT, I am sad that you are faced with such a difficult decision. I have no advice, never having been through this myself, but my thoughts are with you and your family! :grouphug

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wow, 15 years old!! welcome to both you and to Mustard. she must be an incredible lady. i'm afraid i don't have any words of wisdom for you, but my thoughts are with you, Mustard and your family. in the meantime, i look forward to reading more about Mustard. :)

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Guest greybookends

Welcome to GT. I know the path your walking and it is a difficult one. The path behind you has many fond and happy memories. May the rest of the path be filled with happy times as well, but when you reach the end of the path you will know it was a wonderful journey and the goodbyes tho sad will just be temporary until you meet again for a much grander adventure in a much better place. :grouphug :grouphug :grouphug :grouphug :grouphug :grouphug

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Oh, I bet she is gorgeous! :wub:

 

She is a very lucky dog to have such a caring, loving owner. All you can do is take the best care of her that you can, get her seen by a vet on a regular basis and make sure that none of her 'old age' problems are fixable, then just care for her and love her till the day comes when her life is more of a burden than a pleasure and then perform that final act of love which is the hardest one of all.

 

I wish all elderly dogs could go like my beloved old Jim - quietly and peacefully in his own bed. I wish that for your grand old lady, too. :bighug

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Guest charmsmom

Welcome to GT. I'm sorry to hear your greybaby is having such a hard time. I'm going to say a few things, but know that I only mean them with Mustard's best interest at heart and with the gentlest kindness.

 

I had to make that Terrible Decision of Love a few weeks ago with my Buddy (cat). He had lymphoma, and in the process, I sat down and looked him in the eye, and told him to let me know when he was ready to go. In the end, he did. It took a couple weeks to get through to me, but he did.

 

One thing you have to ask yourself is who you're really keeping her around for. I've had kids who I've kept around long after they should have been because I wanted them here, even though they were miserable and suffering, and I regretted it terribly afterward. It may be humiliating to her that you have to clean her up. If she hates being helped, and you're crying while you help her, you should sit down and spend some time with her and see if she may be ready for the bridge. 12 years with you is a wonderful time, and she couldn't have had a better mom. Since you love her like I know you do, maybe it's best to help her cross while she still has some dignity even though it will be painful. Odds are, she's hanging around because she knows you want her. If you don't feel you can help her cross, then you must give her permission to go. Tell her you love her, but that you don't want her to stay if she's in pain.

 

I know that is a terrible thing to watch, and please don't hate me for telling you this, but you really must do what is best for her. Greys are the most selfless creatures...repay her the love she has given you. :weep:bighug:brokenheart:candle

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Guest LolasMom
Welcome to GT. I'm sorry to hear your greybaby is having such a hard time. I'm going to say a few things, but know that I only mean them with Mustard's best interest at heart and with the gentlest kindness.

 

I had to make that Terrible Decision of Love a few weeks ago with my Buddy (cat). He had lymphoma, and in the process, I sat down and looked him in the eye, and told him to let me know when he was ready to go. In the end, he did. It took a couple weeks to get through to me, but he did.

 

One thing you have to ask yourself is who you're really keeping her around for. I've had kids who I've kept around long after they should have been because I wanted them here, even though they were miserable and suffering, and I regretted it terribly afterward. It may be humiliating to her that you have to clean her up. If she hates being helped, and you're crying while you help her, you should sit down and spend some time with her and see if she may be ready for the bridge. 12 years with you is a wonderful time, and she couldn't have had a better mom. Since you love her like I know you do, maybe it's best to help her cross while she still has some dignity even though it will be painful. Odds are, she's hanging around because she knows you want her. If you don't feel you can help her cross, then you must give her permission to go. Tell her you love her, but that you don't want her to stay if she's in pain.

 

I know that is a terrible thing to watch, and please don't hate me for telling you this, but you really must do what is best for her. Greys are the most selfless creatures...repay her the love she has given you. :weep:bighug:brokenheart:candle

 

Having to make this same difficult decision over the past three years with two of my beloved senior pups (14 and 15), I couldn't agree more. I truely believe with all my heart that letting go can often be the greatest gift you can give. The love lives on until you'll be together again and never a day goes by that a smile doesn't come to my lips imagining them running free from the bridge. Mustard is one lucky grand dam to have such a loving mom and family. Talk to her...ask her to help you know if and when it's time to leave...and let her know you'll be ok...I think they need to know that. I'm typing with with tears in my eyes... :beatheart:beatheart

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Welcome to GT. :welcome2

 

Just from your post I can sense how much Mustard means to you.

So glad you have come here.

Alicia and Foster Yoshi ( pit bull) 

Always in my heart: WV's Milky Way 6/25/2000- 4/22/2013, Hank ( St Bernard/Boxer) ???? - 10/3/2017 and Sweet Pea (English bulldog)  2004 - 6/19/2019

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Guest MomofSweetPotatoes

Welcome to You, Mustard and your family.

 

I would love to see a picture of your grand Older Lady.

 

Wishing you and Mustard much peace.

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Guest jmsgreyhnd

Thank you all for your kind and honest words.

(I am working on getting a picture up, but I am not too adept at this.)

At the moment, Must is calm and relaxing. She seems to like to rest and watch most of the time.

My son and I had london broil for dinner, and guess who was standing and staring in her most charming way. She had a bit of meat, rice and salad for desert after her dinner. This makes me feel she is still ok with the world.

Perhaps my greatest worry is my son, who is a gentle soul (even at 19). He again talked about her having "lots of time." I talked about "probably before you come home for Thanksgiving." I feel so torn between my babies!

Again, thank you for your support. I will be around for a while, it seems. But we will see how things go. I will not let her be uncomfortable for either of us.

judith

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Guest 2Greys2luv

Hi and welcome! :wave

 

I have recently had to make that same decision and it was the hardest one that I have ever made. :brokenheart What a great mom you are though, 15 WOW!

 

Sending many :bighug :bighug :bighug :bighug

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Guest sweetpea

My sweet Brodie (ridgeback rescue) had a tough final year. I kept waiting for a definite sign, I wanted to be sure; I wanted the decision to be made for me, but it never was. My dad sent this email after we decided to let him go:

Sorry for the lame phone message -- when it was time to speak I was at a loss. I'm sorry that your first dog turned out to be a rather short and not always pleasant experience. You had an accelerated course in the ups and downs of owning a dog; but you couldn't have had a better dog to take you on the journey. He had led a 'dog's life' in the worst possible sense of the word for three quarters of his life. You came along, took pity on him, really 'rescued' him and did he ever respond! I can remember how 'sad' he looked when you first brought him by and how great he looked the next time I saw him. He showed us all why people want dogs around. With care and affection he rebounded from the most abysmal treatment and truly became your best friend. You showed him what the 'pact' between humans and dogs should be; he showed you why we want to maintain that pact. Because of you the last quarter of his life was a 'dogs life' in the best possible sense of the word. Again,I'm sorry about Brodie,I hope you can take comfort that it was you who made his life worth living. Da

 

You have given Mustard the beautiful life she so deserved. They count on us for everything, even permission to go sometimes. It is an agonizing decision to make, especially if you have family members on different pages about the reality of the situation.

I still cry sometimes, because we had him for only 2 years, because he had such a brief window of good times. Having your girl for 12 years is truly a gift, one that you seemed to have made the most of. Best of luck to you and yours.

Buzzy

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Welcome to GT, Judith. :wave With my seniors, my primary concern has always been their quality of life. Intractible pain that doesn't respond to medication has been a reason to let them go (OS and a shoulder injury that couldn't be fixed). Potty problems and being more fragile and/or wobbly requires my creative problem solving. My little Phoenix, who's also 15 has about a 6 hour bladder on a good day. She is s/w predictable about where she'll pee (like on her bed) so I've gotten thrown-away bed pads (washable) from the hospital where I work and lined her bed with them, and also covered a couple of throw rugs that are occasional targets. I found a gal who will pet sit for me several days a week, and either lets the dogs out in the yard for a potty break, or will take them for a short walk if the weather is cool enough. For her wobblies, I supervise her on stairs, always a light hand on her collar in case she stumbles. I put on all the lights at night so she can see better. When she was worse, I'd use a towel looped under her tuck for extra support. She's also VERY independent. :rolleyes: I'm extra careful that the boys don't knock into her when they go in or out of the back door to the yard, etc. I've had a couple of spells with her in the last year that made me worried that she wouldn't make it through the weekend, but she's always pulled through and gets strong again. X-rays and bloodwork also look great and the vet has no idea what's going on. Hopefully, Mustard will continue to have much more quality time with you. Sending our prayers and lots of light to her. :hope

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....and Beloved Bridge Angels Sandee, Shari, Wells, Derby, Phoenix, Jerry Lee and Finnian.....
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Reading your post brought me to tears. We lost our beloved Tori almost exactly 3 years ago. She was almost 11 1/2. She had only been with us for 3 years, but they were good years and left us with many happy memories. Even after 3 years, I miss her terribly...

 

Your family and Mustard will be in my thoughts and prayers. God bless you for giving her such a good life - and God bless these sweet greys for all the sweet and gentle love they bring to our lives.

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What a wonderful, full life your baby has led! Welcome aboard and I hope someone here has some helpful words for you.

Judy, mom to Darth Vader, Bandita, And Angel

Forever in our hearts, DeeYoGee, Dani, Emmy, Andy, Heart, Saint, Valentino, Arrow, Gee, Bebe, Jilly Bean, Bullitt, Pistol, Junior, Sammie, Joey, Gizmo, Do Bee

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Welcome and a very happy 15th birthday to a much loved girl! What a gift to have her reach this age with you.

 

Before I was ever faced with it, people told me "Don't worry, you will just know when it's time". I must say I found no comfort in this and was so sure they were wrong, and continued to agonize over it. My head was full of lots of "what ifs" and I was so afraid of doing the wrong thing. I too have dedicated my life to a helping profession and know how easy it is to lose one's self in service and to agonize over doing the right thing. But in the end my beloved companions have clearly told me and the sense of peace was unbelievable -- the peace of knowing I was doing the right thing for them.

 

I'm sure you will continue to treasure every precious day and as simplistic and unbelievable as it sounds now, she trusts you and I think she will tell you. :grouphug But, of course, today is a day to celebrate her 15 wonderful years!

 

Cynthia, & Cristiano, galgo
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"It came to me that every time I lose a dog they take a piece of my heart with them. And every new dog who comes into my life, gifts me with a piece of their heart. If I live long enough, all the components of my heart will be dog, and I will become as generous and loving as they are." -- Unknown

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Welcome from another social worker. Happy birthday to your baby. Hugs to you.

I have been in your position twice in the last 4 years with my two old goldens who were 13. I needed to help them up and cried over them many times. I made "THE DECISION" several times with each of them but put it off when the dog was in better shape the next day. I was so worried that I could deprive the dog of one more good day. In doing so I subjected him to more than one more bad day. Dogs don't know time....they live in the present. It is better to let them go a day early than to make them stay for us. I don't know your dog. You may not be there yet but it sounds close. That last act of love is a hard one but the dog is usually much more ready than we are.

 

Enjoy her birthday. Take pictures. Talk to your son. Treasure the time you have left. Hugs!

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Guest Snowy8

Bless your heart...wow 15 yrs old....and I'm concerned about my 13 yr old. Although they'll probably out live us!

Welcome to Greytalk...I'm anxious to hear more stories about Mustard!

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