Seperation Anxiety - Driving Us Batty!

[Guest Lisa_S]

Hi again - I suspect I'll be here daily w/ a question at the rate I'm going!

So, as you can imagine, KJ's is having some SA.

I'm the one who brought her home, spent time w/ her, etc. In essence I'm the person she trusts the most and looks for. She's warming up to being home w/ DH or even my older kids (14 & 12).

The problem is that she whines and downright howls (as it's been described to me)

She's been out of the crate 100% of the time since night 2 and has settled into home life really well. She's smart and wants to listen and please. (even DH & the kids!)

But when I leave - oh man.

 

Here's my quandary - do I just wait it out & she'll eventually learn being home alone isn't bad or do I put her back in her crate only when I'm gone? Will it create a place she feels safe when I'm gone or stress her out more because she's been out for a week?

 

(But can a week out of crate ruin 4.5 years of experience in a crate? I'm inclined to think not but she's a dog, I don't know! )

 

Thanks guys! I just want her comfortable. And it'd be very helpful if she remained quiet when I bring my eldest to the bus and the younger one is still sleeping!

 

Lisa & KJ (I'll have a pic soon!)

 

 

[Guest Zizi]

I would try the crate. She may feel safe there when your away. I have a yorkie that I have to crate when I leave or she sits and barks the entire time I'm gone. You would think they would love the run of the house but I guess some just feel safer in there den.

[greysmom]

Search the forum for threads about "Alone Training." Whether you try the crate or not, and whether you stay with crating or not, you need to be very rigorous about doing this for your girl. Taking the time to do this now will help tremendously down the road.

[Guest jschwe]

The crates work for some, and not for others. Superbird decided a week after we got him that the crate was a place he absolutely NEVER wanted to be again. After some fighting this, we left him out & muzzled (we have two cats) and he did much better. He is much worse with me leaving than with DH, and I had the same problem at first where he would freak when I left. He got over his noisemaking, but when he is stressed he pees. It took us a while to figure him out, but ultimately we found what worked for us was a 'before we leave' routine.

 

Regardless of what time we leave, we get ready, then we take him for a 3 min walk to the park at the end of our street and back, then we put on his muzzle and go out the door. If we do this, he is fine for as long as we leave him. If we skip one thing, or do them in a different order, he will without fail pee on the floor. For him, it is all about the routine.

 

ETA: I should mention that we also did alone training with him, me especially.

Edited October 7, 2013 by jschwe

[Bill419]

Get a second dog and the SA will stop immediately. Greyhounds aren't used to not having other dogs around them.

[Guest LunaTheGreyt]

Get a second dog and the SA will stop immediately. Greyhounds aren't used to not having other dogs around them.

 

This is the only thing that "cured" Luna's SA. I adopted my parents' older dog and she was immediately fine. This is not an option for everyone, though. Definitely work on Alone Training. Take it slow! People will also suggest calming music/TV, Kong filled with treats, crating, babygating instead of crating, covering the crate, taking a long walk before leaving, DAP diffuser or collar, herbal supplements, prescription medication......but none of that worked for Luna. Try it all though!

Edited October 8, 2013 by LunaTheGreyt

[Brandiandwe]

Get a second dog and the SA will stop immediately. Greyhounds aren't used to not having other dogs around them.

 

Or you'll end up with two dogs with SA.....

 

Give it time and let her have the crate.

[GeorgeofNE]

Get a second dog and the SA will stop immediately. Greyhounds aren't used to not having other dogs around them.

 

Not a practical solution for a lot of people.

 

If it were me, I'd take the dog with me when I escorted my teenager to the bus stop. Or more likely I'd just send the kid off on his own...I would have rather died than be seen with my mother when I was 14!

 

Taking the dog with you not only gives the dog some exercise, which I expect he doesn't get a lot of, it also shows the dog where you're doing, and he learns that you both go BACK. It's very bonding to have a dog be part of things.

[krissy]

In my opinion, it's only been a week. And potentially you have not left her too many times in that period (because a week isn't very long). For the longest time I would crate Kili any time I was leaving the house, even if DBF was home because I didn't trust him to supervise her (and when she was young she had recurrent UTIs so she had to be watched like a hawk for signs that she needed to go out).

 

Finally when she was about 9-10 months old and we had corrected the cause of her UTIs, I would occasionally leave her out if DBF was home and I just needed to pop out quickly. Well, I'd come home and DBF would tell me about the panic ridden state that the puppy had been in. Standing up at the front door, looking out our front window, running back and forth through the house looking for me. But now she's used to it. Most of the time if I pop out for a second she follows me to the door and then goes back to whatever she was doing. She's got it figured out now. If only she would figure out that when I go to the bathroom and close the door... she does NOT need to try to accompany me!

 

Personally I'd either crate her if she's amenable to it, or I would simply let her be upset for a little longer and see if there is improvement. She can't learn if you don't give her the chance. I'd only start to work on correcting the problem if she's not showing signs that she's starting to understand.

 

And a second dog won't help in this situation I wouldn't think, because it's not like there's no one home. It sounds like it is mostly just when the OP leaves but family is still home with the dog.

[Guest laura150]

I had issues w SA too. We did a ton of alone training. I'd pick up my keys, say see you later and shut the door then walk in a minute later. Do the same thing for 2 min, 5, 10, 20 until they are bored and don't care that you're leaving. I did this for an hour or so the first few days and then upped it after that. Now sometimes he doesn't even get off his bed when I leave. He knows I'm always going to come back.

 

Good luck! I'm sure everything will get better.

[jaym1]

one week isn't very long. it's entirely possible this will just go away on its own. but you should approach the situation as though it will not. serious "alone" training (even though she won't be alone), and tons of positive reinforcement and conditioning is the best way to go. that way, if this is a serious, long-term issue, you can begin to tackle it now, and if it's not, then all is well, too. as stated above, you could get one, two, or ten other greyhounds -- that won't matter, as it's your absence, not being alone that seems to be triggering the anxiety.

 

i would also decelerate on showing lavish affection to the dog for now. be a little more stoic. right now she's clinging to you for support at all times, and that can be addictive. you're like her life jacket, and she needs to learn how to swim.

[Guest Lisa_S]

Thanks guys! I am alternating when I take her w/ me vs leaving her. For example when I drop off my older girls for school, I bring her b/c crying will wake up DH & youngest DD.

Then if I need to go to store, I leave her.

Maybe that's rushing it so I'll do the few mind for a few days. I still need to leave her for some things but maybe doing it slowly & only leaving her for a few hours when I absolutely have to will help?

[Guest LunaTheGreyt]

So is she crying/howling when she is actually *with* your family, or is she downstairs away from them? If she thinks she's totally alone, it's different than just being attached to you and howling even with other people. Will she work on a Kong when you're away, or is she too upset? Luna would never eat anything I left for her when her SA was at its worst.

[Guest Lisa_S]

LunaTheGreyt it's only when I'm gone.

If I'm home w/ family she's fine. She doesn't see DH as much as me - I'm home he works. So, while it makes sense she doesn't realize he's probably cooler than me, he's frustrated w/ it. He really likes her and the SA while I'm gone is really frustrating

[Guest LunaTheGreyt]

LunaTheGreyt it's only when I'm gone.

If I'm home w/ family she's fine. She doesn't see DH as much as me - I'm home he works. So, while it makes sense she doesn't realize he's probably cooler than me, he's frustrated w/ it. He really likes her and the SA while I'm gone is really frustrating

 

Oh, that is very frustrating! Any chance your husband and kids can start taking some of her "chores" over, such as feeding, walking, brushing? It will help your hound bond with them. If they are already doing that, just keep it up...she is very new and still learning the ropes in your home. Also try to desensitize her to you leaving - get shoes/purse/keys, leave, but return before she can start whining (might only be long enough to shut the door). Keep practicing leaving until she gets bored with it. Do that for a few weeks and she should start to calm down when you leave for longer periods of time.

[Guest Lisa_S]

Thank you!! I will implement tomorrow!!!