krissy Posted June 8, 2011 Author Share Posted June 8, 2011 I have read every single post thoroughly both yours (Krissy) and the replies and I can see that this is really a pickle and there is no 'ideal' solution. When I am faced with dilemma and can't find the ideal solution I then go back over my options and find the ones that are 'least problematic' If I were in this position the least problematic would be to have Summit go back home with BF. I would much rather do something like that then leave my dog with someone I really don't know well (if at all). JMO. As for those who made off hand remarks about the BF in this situation. I think that is unfair. It sounds like the BF is willing even he is somewhat reluctant to take on the care of the critters. Not everyone is a natural caretaker of pets, that doesn't make them a bad person. In fact, if a person such as this is willing to take on the responsibility, even when it is not a passion of theirs I think it's a testament to their character that they are willing to try. Yeah, it's kind of a sucky situation. I know some people think it's black and white, but personally I don't live in a world that is that simple. I wish I did. I am going to try tomorrow moving his crate upstairs into the living room. That is where he wants to be and why he's trying to break out. It's not because I'm not home (except for the fact that when I'm home he's not in his crate and can be in the living room... therefore it is kind of because I'm not home). So I'm going to crate him up there since he likes it up there. He will be able to see who comes in and out so maybe that'll make him less anxious or upset about hearing people he can't get to. My only one concern with this plan is that the "ignore the dog" upon arriving home part of alone training will be totally shot because no one else is going to ignore him... in fact the little girl is going to run in every time and make a huge fuss about him. I will talk to her mom about talking to grandma about "ignoring the dog", but I know from experience that when you tell people to ignore your dog... they nod and say they understand and then completely and utterly fail to ignore the dog. But anyway, maybe that'll be a better spot for him. We talked about crating the beagle next door so they could have company, but I don't know if she'll spend a lot of energy being annoying and trying to get to him, so might not be the best plan. The BF offered today to have Summit come home. I had not told him yet that I was thinking about sending him home after the weekend if this week went badly as well. He offered. I then pointed out how much extra work that would be for him... getting up even earlier to walk him, etc. He did sound a little overwhelmed... I think he forgot about exactly all the things I do with the dog AND rabbits and how much time and effort goes into taking care of the whole lot, but he still offered to have the dog home if I wanted. So, he's probably partly hoping I don't send Summit home, and he'll probably still do a lot less than I do in terms of walking and training, but he's certainly more than willing to take care of all 4 if he has to. I think he's getting a real appreciation for how much extra work I do in taking care of all our pets. Quote Kristie and the Apex Agility Greyhounds: Kili (ATChC AgMCh Lakilanni Where Eagles Fly RN IP MSCDC MTRDC ExS Bronze ExJ Bronze ) and Kenna (Lakilanni Kiss The Sky RN MADC MJDC AGDC AGEx AGExJ). Waiting at the Bridge: Retired racer Summit (Bbf Dropout) May 5, 2005-Jan 30, 2019 Like us on Facebook! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
seeh2o Posted June 8, 2011 Share Posted June 8, 2011 Wow, you are in a real tough spot. It sounds like you are looking at and weighing all your options. My Carl has SA and did a lot of the same things Summit has done. I did find out he was hypothyroid, but that was long after we did all the alone training and he had to be on medication to help the relearn new coping behaviors (he was on clomipramine for 4 - 5 months). Hats off to you for trying to find a workable solution. And I'm sorry you have had some less than kind responses to your dilemma, you're right about black and white vs shades of grey. Quote Sunsands Doodles: Doodles aka Claire, Bella Run Softly: Softy aka Bowie (the Diamond Dog) Missing my beautiful boy Sunsands Carl 2.25.2003 - 4.1.2014 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest HHHounds Posted June 8, 2011 Share Posted June 8, 2011 No advice, but sending some prayers for peace! Sounds like you are a wonderful and greyt grey mom - you are careful, thoughtful and do everything to the best of your ability... and with all of your heart! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Figmama Posted June 8, 2011 Share Posted June 8, 2011 Wow, I've been reading all the posts too and understand your dilemma. Maybe moving the crate upstairs will help. I hope so. I think I agree with maybe sending him home with the BF for the 4 weeks. I understand you are the main caregiver, same here with my DH. He does walk our Grey twice a day, time permitting. If you send the dog back home, maybe you could arrange for a dog walker to come in once a day to take Summit out and/or for a walk? I don't know how much that would be or what your finances are but perhaps you could handle that for 4 weeks. Hope you can get some resolution. You, obviously, care a lot about the dog. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
XTRAWLD Posted June 8, 2011 Share Posted June 8, 2011 Krissy, I've read all the posts. What a situation you are in. I've been so fortunate with Ryder, I know he is bored, and am SO lucky he hasn't destroyed our house! I do have a question, and it can probably be answered with the on-call/busy answer, but what happened to agility? Wasn't he amazing? Maybe he misses it, maybe he's that type of dog that always needs that mental stimulation? But as people have said here, I think a lot of it has to do with hearing people in the house that he can't get to. Even with the boys are in the bedroom with me, and I close the door and hubby is out in the living room, it takes them FOREVER to get settled, especially if he's making noise out there. You are in quite the predicament and I wish you a lot of luck. I guess the option of taking him to the office is out huh. Doggie daycare does sound like the best solution to me though. Good luck again. Johanne Quote Proudly owned by:10 year old "Ryder" CR Redman Gotcha May 201012.5 year old Angel "Kasey" Goodbye Kasey Gotcha July 2005-Aug 1, 2015 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Giselle Posted June 9, 2011 Share Posted June 9, 2011 Just wanted to add... I know you think increased exercise and mental stimulation will help the situation, but the truth is that Summit has an emotional problem, not a physical one. Even if you came back from a marathon and finished taking the MCATs, you would still react to a burglar in your house with the same reaction as if you'd not done all that physical/mental exercise. Your body was designed with the primordial instinct to survive stress through specific physiological biochemical pathways, as you already know. So, even if you ran a mile or did a crossword puzzle beforehand, your body will STILL react the same way to stress than if you hadn't done all that exercise. Summit's issue is stress. It isn't exercise or mental stimulation. It doesn't matter if you run him ragged and train until he drops. He will still react to stress by destroying objects. So, when you can recognize that, I think the "most ideal solution" would be to find the situation that minimizes his stress most. And, then, the destruction will abate. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
krissy Posted June 9, 2011 Author Share Posted June 9, 2011 Krissy, I've read all the posts. What a situation you are in. I've been so fortunate with Ryder, I know he is bored, and am SO lucky he hasn't destroyed our house! I do have a question, and it can probably be answered with the on-call/busy answer, but what happened to agility? Wasn't he amazing? Maybe he misses it, maybe he's that type of dog that always needs that mental stimulation? But as people have said here, I think a lot of it has to do with hearing people in the house that he can't get to. Even with the boys are in the bedroom with me, and I close the door and hubby is out in the living room, it takes them FOREVER to get settled, especially if he's making noise out there. You are in quite the predicament and I wish you a lot of luck. I guess the option of taking him to the office is out huh. Doggie daycare does sound like the best solution to me though. Good luck again. Johanne We can't drive an hour home to Guelph for agility class (and an hour home again). I mean, I could, but there are days where I'm on call and can't, and there are days where I get stuck at work longer and we wouldn't be able to make it home in time for the class. I called all the places in Stratford and no one offers agility. I took him out to one place tonight though and she gave me the contact info for someone just outside town who DOES do agility, so I'm going to contact them and see if they can figure something out for me and Summit to do some agility. As an update, I moved Summit's crate upstairs to the living room and it would appear that he is much happier there. He lay down within a few minutes even though I hadn't left the house, and didn't even stand up when I came home. I couldn't video tape him because my camera is dead, so I can't know for sure but he seemed much more relaxed. We will keep the crate upstairs and see how things go day by day. Quote Kristie and the Apex Agility Greyhounds: Kili (ATChC AgMCh Lakilanni Where Eagles Fly RN IP MSCDC MTRDC ExS Bronze ExJ Bronze ) and Kenna (Lakilanni Kiss The Sky RN MADC MJDC AGDC AGEx AGExJ). Waiting at the Bridge: Retired racer Summit (Bbf Dropout) May 5, 2005-Jan 30, 2019 Like us on Facebook! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Figmama Posted June 9, 2011 Share Posted June 9, 2011 Krissy, I've read all the posts. What a situation you are in. I've been so fortunate with Ryder, I know he is bored, and am SO lucky he hasn't destroyed our house! I do have a question, and it can probably be answered with the on-call/busy answer, but what happened to agility? Wasn't he amazing? Maybe he misses it, maybe he's that type of dog that always needs that mental stimulation? But as people have said here, I think a lot of it has to do with hearing people in the house that he can't get to. Even with the boys are in the bedroom with me, and I close the door and hubby is out in the living room, it takes them FOREVER to get settled, especially if he's making noise out there. You are in quite the predicament and I wish you a lot of luck. I guess the option of taking him to the office is out huh. Doggie daycare does sound like the best solution to me though. Good luck again. Johanne We can't drive an hour home to Guelph for agility class (and an hour home again). I mean, I could, but there are days where I'm on call and can't, and there are days where I get stuck at work longer and we wouldn't be able to make it home in time for the class. I called all the places in Stratford and no one offers agility. I took him out to one place tonight though and she gave me the contact info for someone just outside town who DOES do agility, so I'm going to contact them and see if they can figure something out for me and Summit to do some agility. As an update, I moved Summit's crate upstairs to the living room and it would appear that he is much happier there. He lay down within a few minutes even though I hadn't left the house, and didn't even stand up when I came home. I couldn't video tape him because my camera is dead, so I can't know for sure but he seemed much more relaxed. We will keep the crate upstairs and see how things go day by day. Fingers crossed that works out!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robinw Posted June 9, 2011 Share Posted June 9, 2011 Great news about Summit! My offer still stands if you need it Quote Xavi the galgo and Peter the cat. Missing Iker the galgo ?-Feb.9/19, Treasure (USS Treasure) April 12/01-May 6/13, Phoenix (Hallo Top Son) Dec.14/99-June 4/11 and Loca (Reko Swahili) Oct.9/95 - June 1/09, Allen the boss cat, died late November, 2021, age 19. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
krissy Posted June 10, 2011 Author Share Posted June 10, 2011 Great news about Summit! My offer still stands if you need it Thanks Robin. We'll take you up on it if we need to, but fingers crossed this is all he needed! We're going to do a level 2 obedience tomorrow. Should be fun to brush up on those skills. Quote Kristie and the Apex Agility Greyhounds: Kili (ATChC AgMCh Lakilanni Where Eagles Fly RN IP MSCDC MTRDC ExS Bronze ExJ Bronze ) and Kenna (Lakilanni Kiss The Sky RN MADC MJDC AGDC AGEx AGExJ). Waiting at the Bridge: Retired racer Summit (Bbf Dropout) May 5, 2005-Jan 30, 2019 Like us on Facebook! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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