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I Am Just So Mad


Guest Valliejo2001

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Guest Valliejo2001

We adopted our first greyhound Maggie Sue six years ago. She was my heart dog. Maggie Sue was the alpha of the pack and treated the other greys with such dignity and watched over them like they were her own. Maggie Sue had it tough. Two strokes in two years and countless foot injuries. She was not the most graceful girl. This past November, we had to help Maggie to the bridge with kidney failure. It seemed to come on so suddenly. It was the hardest thing I had to do.

 

I know that I am not the only one who has lost a beloved grey but when does the anger stop and the acceptance begin? There is not a day goes by that I don't feel her, hear her. I miss my baby so much. Some words of wisdom will be appreciated. Thankyou so much.

 

Darlene

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Guest tygar
We adopted our first greyhound Maggie Sue six years ago. She was my heart dog. Maggie Sue was the alpha of the pack and treated the other greys with such dignity and watched over them like they were her own. Maggie Sue had it tough. Two strokes in two years and countless foot injuries. She was not the most graceful girl. This past November, we had to help Maggie to the bridge with kidney failure. It seemed to come on so suddenly. It was the hardest thing I had to do.

 

I know that I am not the only one who has lost a beloved grey but when does the anger stop and the acceptance begin? There is not a day goes by that I don't feel her, hear her. I miss my baby so much. Some words of wisdom will be appreciated. Thankyou so much.

 

Darlene

1348086[/snapback]

 

I'm so sorry for your loss...

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Guest sweetgsmom

We lost our first Grey two and 1/2 years ago and I don't think it ever stops, it has stayed with us all this time.. I am not mad anymore but it is so hard to talk about. Jessie was the sweetest boy ever. I am now owned by three grey, each one is special in his or her own way and I love them just as much, but I will never forget our Jess, allways in my heart, and I think about him everyday. But I know I will get to see him at the rainbow bridge.

Okay now I am crying so I have to go........

 

Jenny........

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I'm not angry about losing Nate- I know that they will all leave us before we are ready to see them go. I miss him terribly- we lost him over a year ago. I like to think he is still nearby and he will always be in our hearts.

Kim, (PW's) Nate Dogg and Chloe (TJ Zorabell) - always in our hearts, (Racey) Benson and Polly (Racey Pauline)

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Guest jennilol

I am so sorry for your loss, I know it is so tough so big hugs to you.

 

I have a friend who is a social worker and she explained to me when I went through my loss was that no matter if it be person or pet, the grieving process is the same as far as what you through. I can't remember the exact order - denial, sadness, anger, and then acceptance maybe? She recommended bereavement counseling for me if it went beyond 6 weeks and was still completely affecting my day to day life.

 

Perhaps this could be helpful for you to talk to someone to help you figure out why you are so angry and also how to deal with it. You will never stop being sad or missing Maggie, but will at least be able to feel better about it.

 

Again, hugs to you and best wishes for getting through this.

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Many times I think we use anger to suppress the hurt. Perhaps you are angry still because you cannot yet handle the extreme hurt of the loss.

 

I can tell you about some of the losses I have had.

 

The only one I have felt anger with was Eliza because I blamed myself--I was angry with myself and the situation.

 

Jesse who went from kidney failure -- I was frustrated.

 

With all the others (10 in total since 1998) as well as Eliza & Jesse, I was sad and felt loss and my heart hurt. It is only the fact that I know they are free & running like the wind that keeps me sane.

 

November is not that long ago. Sending prayers to you for peace and many

:grouphug

Diane & The Senior Gang

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I'm so sorry. I do understand. :bighug Jennilol is right, there are well-recognised stages of grief which we all pass through, some we pass through so quickly that we hardly notice them, and then we'll perhaps get stuck in one of them for too long.

 

She missed one out. The one I got stuck in with Susan was guilt. I felt so guilty that we'd only had her five months and for all of that time she'd been getting sicker and sicker and I hadn't managed to find out exactly what was wrong with her until her final day - after insisting on a referral to a vet school we found that it wasn't simple age-related kidney failure that she had, it was kidney cancer. I used to wake in the night sweating over how I'd let her down, and cried for weeks over that poor dog. I got past it, but it you are still feeling so angry this long after Maggie's death, you might consider counselling. Though, to be fair, it is only 4/5 months and in terms of grief, that's not long.

 

I don't feel so agonised over Jim's death, (although I do miss him terribly and I do cry a lot) because I knew what was wrong and what to expect and I knew we were doing all we could. Also, he was very old and died a natural death (just didn't wake one morning) and I do think extra guilt and anger come into play when you have to help them over, as we did with Susan and as you did with Maggie.

 

It's now two years since we lost Suze and I can tell you that it does get easier. I am no longer wracked with guilt, and I can talk of her without dissolving into tears - I can remember her with love and affection and look at her photos without intolerable pain. Try to examine your feelings about what happened honestly and see if you can think why you feel such anger. It could be that you feel guilt (misplaced, I'm certain) which is being expressed as anger.

 

Guilt is such a normal part of grieving, but you need to get past it. We cannot be held accountable for everything which happens to one of our beloved family members, human or animal, because no-one is perfect. We are only human ourselves and we do make mistakes, fail to notice things, etc etc. We all do our best, and it's a very odd thing, but we are usually far, far more willing to forgive others than to forgive ourselves.

 

Maggie would not judge anyone. And she is beyond pain and distress now, and at peace.

 

A few things which helped me were planting a 'Susan' magnolia and a 'Susan' rose in her memory, lighting candles for her, and just talking to her. You could make a memory box for Maggie, or plant up a tub in her memory, or have a photograph framed perhaps. These little things we do all help to give us a focus for our grief and allow us to move on.

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The plural of anecdote is not data

Brambleberry Greyhounds My Etsy Shop

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I am so sorry for your loss. We lost our Angel Sophia last August and the pain is still so fresh. :( I think that we must travel through many phases of grief until we finally reach acceptance. Sending my prayers your way...I know how much you hurt. :grouphug:grouphug

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Patti-Mommy of Lady Sophia 7-28-92 - 8-3-04... LaceyLaine 8-2-94-12-5-07...

Flash Gordon 7-14-99 - 8-29-09... BrookLynne...Pavé Maria... and 18 Bridge Kids.

WATCHING OVER US~SOPHIA~QUEENIE~LACEY LAINE~

CODY ANGELO~FLASH GORDON.

 

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I lost my two boyz who I had since they were six weeks old in the past year, I have gone through every conceivable emotion and I still am, but I am starting to feel a sense of peace and I hope that you will soon too. You did your very best for Maggie Sue, that is all she ever needed from you, and I'm sure you have wonderful memories of her. She is no longer in pain and is running free with all the sweet puppers that we have loved and lost, waiting to meet you again one day :grouphug:grouphug

<p>"One day I hope to be the person my dog thinks I am"Sadi's Pet Pages Sadi's Greyhound Data PageMulder1/9/95-21/3/04 Scully1/9/95-16/2/05Sadi 7/4/99 - 23/6/13 CroftviewRGT

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Guest PhillyPups

I still miss Runner and The Divine Ms. SugarBear, Patricia will tell you, it hits me at strange times and I will just sit and cry for their loss, although Runner was sudden and Sugs I had to help due to osteo, the pain of the loss is there. I love my greys, but miss my bridge angels so much.

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Guest greyhidden

Darlene, if this will help, if U have another grey, put full throttle words, deeds, and thoughts to that one, do everything with that one. Try not to think about your loss bc that will only make it worse. I know, it hurts. Go inside your bdrm; give yrslf a good cry; don't come out till U feel that U did everything for that deceased grey. I feel for your loss. When I had to put Radar down bc of cancer of mouth; I came back inside my vehicle; cried like a baby "I can't believe I did this!" over; over again. I sat there for 30 min; realized that I did the best for him. NO MORE PAIN, Radar. Just keep a good memory of your grey; THE GOOD TIMES, not the BAD TIMES. U will get over it, I did. LIfe goes on. Try getting another grey, Give it all U got with it. Maybe Foster one. Hang in there, Darlene, I had to; but I did MOVE ON. God bless, Happy Easter, everyone!

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Darlene,

 

I am so sorry. I don't think the pain ever leaves completely; however, I do feel we, in time, get used to them being physically gone.

 

not a day goes by that I don't feel her, hear her

 

I believe that spiritually they don't always leave us. Sometimes they stay or stop in to make sure we're O.K.

 

And as Diane said, November isn't that long ago. Maggie Sue was your first and she was with you a long time. That's not easy to get over.

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Tonya, mom to May, and my angels Vinnie, Rex, Red, Chase, and Jake.

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Guest how888

Darlene, my heart aches for you for I can feel your pain.There isn't a day that goes by that I don't feel or think of Howie.Not only the guilt or denial of losing him to lupus but knowing you put all your trust in us to take care of him.As someone who should know about these things due to my job,I still feel the denial,anger and yes guilt even though he just had his checkup.I believe in my heart that Howie is "Somewhere Over The Rainbow" waiting for us once more with Maggie Sue.I'm glad you still feel her around you and she's still sending mom those signs.You have now given me another gift.My beautiful precious UNACUSTOMED,(NIKE), that you picked up from the track and took care of.That day Howie sent that sign and I saw Nike, I knew he was the one.Nike sends lots of big slobber kisses and hopes you get through this.Every time you feel down just think of how many you saved from the track,how many you hauled for miles and miles to find them a home.I thank you from the bottom of my heart for giving me a chance to know what it's like having a greyhound.Just believe Maggie Sue is running around that bridge chasing Howie and watching over mom. :bighug:bighug:f_pink:f_pink:gh_run

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Guest Snowy8

I lost 3 greys in 8 months...the most painful being Bool. We found cancer in him...and the tumor had ruptured. That is the very first time in all my life that I slammed my fist into the wall & screamed at God.

3 years earlier I had lost my first greyhound Sadie-Grey to the attack of an akita...I did not ask why this happened...I accepted it although for years I still cry so hard over her.

When I got that call that Bool had cancer & he was not going to wake him up from surgery...I slammed the phone down & I was so angry. Why him...why not the one that fights & hurts the others, why not someone elses dog. Why not take the one that has epilepsy...why!

That's been 2 yrs ago & so much has happened since...the only thing I can think of is that He took Bool, so that others could have a home too. That Bool had done his work on earth...he had made me happy & it was now time for someone else to do the job.

You're right when you say its the healing & mourning process...finally there comes a time when we accept it...

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Guest Snowy8

How888/Linda...you are so right...When Bool died...I spent the day home, with the curtains drawn...sad music playing...no phone calls. The next day I went to the kennels & Jan introduced me to the spitting image of Bool (Dear)...it was unbelievable.

So there is another out there that MaggieSue will send to you if she hasn't already...and when you see those rainbows .... think of her...she's sending you a love note.

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Guest tracy
We adopted our first greyhound Maggie Sue six years ago. She was my heart dog. Maggie Sue was the alpha of the pack and treated the other greys with such dignity and watched over them like they were her own. Maggie Sue had it tough. Two strokes in two years and countless foot injuries. She was not the most graceful girl. This past November, we had to help Maggie to the bridge with kidney failure. It seemed to come on so suddenly. It was the hardest thing I had to do.

 

I know that I am not the only one who has lost a beloved grey but when does the anger stop and the acceptance begin? There is not a day goes by that I don't feel her, hear her. I miss my baby so much. Some words of wisdom will be appreciated. Thankyou so much.

 

Darlene

1348086[/snapback]

Darlene,

I know exactly how you feel. I just lost my Pilot March 15th.I don't know when you stop being angry as I am feeling the same as you. I don't think we ever accept that they have left us, it hurts bad and it's ok to be mad. Try to think of all the good times you had with Mags,I talk to Pilot every day. He hears me. I know Darlene it's tough I hear Pi too. Losing one of these special dogs is just so hard. I'm going to go a scapbook as soon as I can pull myself together, right now I just can't do it. I don't know if we ever get closer. At least we have a lot of support from this wonderful site. God bless you.

Tracy

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Guest Missing_Holiday

I know that I am not the only one who has lost a beloved grey but when does the anger stop and the acceptance begin? There is not a day goes by that I don't feel her, hear her. I miss my baby so much. Some words of wisdom will be appreciated. Thankyou so much.

 

Darlene

 

 

Darlene, I'm so sorry for your loss. I just lost my beloved Holiday yesterday. I don't have the answers for you...we all grieve differently. I don't feel angry right now, I feel heartbroken and a bit guilty, even though it was the right decision. Just know that whatever feelings you are having are normal, that it's OK to be angry, and it's OK to express your feelings. The anger will diminish and turn into a different emotion, but it takes time. I keep telling myself that time heals all wounds and that someday I will be able to think of Holiday and smile instead of weep. Try to keep that in mind and know that you are not alone...

 

Dawn

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