Banjoman
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Posts posted by Banjoman
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Gud neerlee bedtyme to awl ower frendz.
We had sum sunneshyne dayz but wiv chillee windz I fink tumorro it gonna rayne until Moneyday. Mum will KNOT mynd too mutch ‘cos she supposed to tayke them batz flying Fursday and Sattiday eevningz but she hurtid hur bak agen wen she gaardning yesserday eevning. She KNOT going enneeware fower a wyle. At leest she gottid sum mor ov them littul Sedum kuttings plantid owt reddee fower the wet wevver.
Miss. NancyToo did yu get the foteegraff Mum sended yu ov ower frunt gaardin? Yu wundered wat it look lyke.
We howpe Sid’s leg and Lacyfer’s tum heal up real kwik kwik.
Zavvi waz a sorta gud boy atta Show on Sunneday. He did deesyde he wantid to kill a verree laarge German Shepherd at wun poynt and a laarge Bully type dog (kompleet wiv muzzel) befor that. Mum towld him that waz KNOT a gud ideeya!
Well, we gotta watch the owld gurl potter around sloowlee and karefullee putting away the fud deelivree and then get reddee fower bed. Miss. Geraldine took me fower a short waak tuday but Zavvi just gottid a waak down the paff to the gowf korse wiv Mum. I dunno iffn we will get owt tumorro.
Gud nyte wagz to awl ower frendz,
Nutmeg on nursing dyootees.
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Gud neerlee bedtyme frendz.
AndyPandy, Mum did sell them poppies lasst yeer and eevin tho she did KNOT get owt veree mennee eevningz ‘cos the wetha waz wetanwindee she mayde ova £300, so she waz pleezed. Ther waz a kommemmorayshun Serviss atta D Day memoreeyal in ower town yesserday morning but she did KNOT go az it wood meen leeving us at howme and she hadda leev us at howme lasst nyte to tayke them batz flying.
There is a special wall plaque memorial as so many D Day soldiers left from this area.
https://www.warmemorialsonline.org.uk/memorial/133644
Fanks Mum.
We wentid fower a waak inna forrist yesserday but Mum saw a Snek inna paff and mayde us wayte till it slivered off. We did KNOT get klose enuff to see xaktlee wat it waz but she finks it myte hav bin an Adder and we gotta stay well away frum them!
On Sunneday we awl going to a Dog Show butt Mum say we will KNOT be in the dog show ‘cos we gonna be lukking afta the display stand fower the batz and howpe we get sum munneez to buy ther fuds and pay fower the veterinararee bills. Az Zavvi izza ratbag wen we see uvver dogz wen we onna waak I do KNOT know how he gonna get on wiv lotsa dogz evereeware but we will be inna pen insyde a gazeebo wyle Mum tawk to peepuls. We hadda praktiss inna pen in Miss. Rita’s gaardin on Tyoosday wyle Mum and Miss. Rita wrap upp prezzies fower the Lucky Dip.
It gon bedtyme now so I gotta go. Miss. Nancy Too, we agree, iffn thayre waz enneefing to wurree abowt then yu wud heer ryte away!
Howpe yur horsie duz well AndyPandy.
Gudnyte Wagz to awl mi frendz,
Nutmeg.
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Miss. Cindy ther iz Nuffing that I kan say that will help atta momint butt I gotta let yu know that me and Mum and Zavvi hav yu klose to ower heartz this eevning and we will be looking fower Angus’ star tunyte. We gots a kleer sky atta momint so I know it will be shyning reel brite.
Likky kissis frum Nutmeg.
Pee Ess.
Fank gudness yo gots that littul whippersnapper to Luv yu!
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Hola howndees, thees Zavvi the Bandito weeth the gleeming black coat! Yesterday I charmed the laydeez at the bath house, they told the long legged human that I had “taken it all in my stride”. Well of course I did, I yam the brayve Bandito! Of corse I showed the human up by “marking” their doorpost on the way in AND on the way out and, because “yu gotta go wen yu gotta go”, she had to pick up after me as I left the building. Some in the entrance and some outside.
I hav also managed to “mark” the long legged houndee a couple of times wen I want to be sure I win the pee on your pee stakes. If she ees in my way that ees not my fault.
Eet will soon be bedtime so I have to leeve yu all. Mees Wiki, your new motor suits your personality, mucho better than the small red theeng that I get transported in!
Zavvi, sweet smelling ( for the moment) Bandito.
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Gud morning frendz, sunnee heer tuday but Mum sez that the breeze iz still chillee.
Charlie, yu and Zorro luk sparklee kleen.
Zavvi iz going to a dog groomer to havva baff and nayle klip inna littul wyle. Mum sez she iz getting too owld and kreeky to grovel onna floor ov the shower to baff him herself! She finks he leeks pee in hiz bed eether at nyte or iffn he getz exsitid wen she kumz home iff she’s had to leev us. Hiz bed iz inna washing masheen ryte now so iffn him and hiz bed nise and kleen layta and she gotta go flying them batz tunyte she kan sniff them boff wen she kum howme and see iffn they smell ov wee!
We howpe yur littul horsee iz OK FancyToo.
Wagz to awl mi frendz,
Nutmeg, who nevva hadda baff sints I bin heer.
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Gud wet and dreeree morning.
Fanks fower the nyoo Club AndyPandy. The owld Club haz gon “Poof” awlreddee!
Wagz to awl mi frendz,
Nutmeg.
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I’m an eedjit!
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Hi Punkin. Lookin gud!
Nutmeg and littul Zavvi in Reel Engaland.
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As soon as I read the name Droopy’s Fresh I knew she must be from my side of the pond as I have seen other Droopy dogs racing at our local stadium.
She’s a beautiful girl and I hope you have many good years together.
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It’s here at last, it’s Christmas Day,
now elves like me can go and play.
Our work is done for a short while,we hope we made you laugh or smile.
All gifts arrived in time, I hope,
whether socks and ties , dog treats or soap.
A few days rest then back to work,
for Santa Paws we never shirk
our job to bring you Christmas cheer
and hope to help again next year.
Merry Christmas from🦇 The batty one.
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Watch out Gino, you’re in luck,
I’m told your box is on the truck
and now it’s on its way to you
I can sit down with a brew!
Of tea that is!
🦇 The batty one.
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As most of you know, when not being an elf for our Secret Santa I volunteer with my local 🦇rescue group.
This morning I was called out to rescue a bat seen hanging on the wall of someone’s porch. When I got there and opened the box the gentleman had put it in I found a lovely Long Eared bat, possibly a young Grey Long Eared, one of our rarest mammals. When I delivered it to HQ we had to come up with a name for him and decided on a Christmassy one and my suggestion of Elf was accepted.
He was very stressed but not obviously too badly injured (cat attacked) so I am hoping in a week or so, after a course of antibiotics, he will be fit enough to be released if the weather co-operates.
🦇 The batty one.
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Gino this is the latest I have heard
and i have no need to doubt the word
of the elf who messaged me
before climbing up a tree!
It sounds it’s on a roundabout
and that’s nothing we can do about.
🦇
It arrived at the Charleston Processing Center on 12/14 and supposedly departed there on 12/16. The status since then has been "Arriving late, in transit to the next facility." Maddening!
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I’ll put my elf socks on and go and ask.
🦇
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Gino, looks like there’s been a glitch!
With Santa’s sleigh there seems a hitch.
I’m told a box has stuck somewhere
in your postal system, down town there.
Don’t know if the reindeer went on strike
so Santa had to ride his bike?
Or just a bit of tech’s gone wrong
preventing that box from moving along?
But in your Post Office it’s been sitting,
don’t know if it’s doing some knitting?
Hopefully it’s soon on the way
for your delight on Christmas Day.
🦇 The batty one.
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I was just off for 40 winks
when Santa said “Please call on Jinks
to say there’s been a slight delay
on loading everything on my sleigh”.
I’m told that there’s a date been mentioned,
the 21st. December’s intentioned,
”Or thereabouts” is what he said.
Now it’s time for me to get to bed.
’Cos an elf gets tired this time of year
after eating cake and drinking beer
at the end of a day spent stacking toys
for all those pesky girls and boys!
But houndie’s goodies we deal with glee
’cos we’re all dog lovers here you see.
So Jinks you must keep watch again
for Santa’s sleigh, through snow and rain
he’ll do his best to get to you
around the time I’ve said he’s due!
🦇 Off to hibernate.
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If you’re going to do a job you’ve got to do it properly!
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Well done to both of. You and Abu too.
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Miss. Ducky, awl I kan do iz send Likky kissis to yu froo the yuessbee. Us howndees know wen we ar luvved and Iyam shur that Leela knew she waz luvved, KNOT ownlee wen she lived wiv yu butt that yu luvved hur enuff to help hur leeve wen she needed to.
Nutmeg and Mum.x
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Carol and Jinks
that’s great! Methinks
I’ll put on my bedsocks,
play music that rocks,
have something to eat
then doze off tout de suite.
🦇 The batty one.
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If you let me know when things have arrivedI’ll see that Santa’s sleigh did glide
to Delaware on the east coast,
then I can have some tea and toast
to stop my hungry tum from rumbling
and into bed I can go tumbling.
🦇
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Now quick, she thinks, you’re calling Jinks,
don’t write a poem that really stinks.
Make it good for this black boy
who says he likes a squeaky toy.
More penguin socks should take the strain
and keep me warm to aid the brain!
Jinks, I’ve had a call from Santa
”Get the reindeer ready to canter”
but to the seaside they have gone
so I have to rely on Amazon
to bring your parcels to Delaware
with Christmas joys that you can share.
December 2nd or thereabout
is the date I’m given, so please watch out
for a delivery from the Amazon man
(don’t know if he has a special van?).
I’m sure that he would drive it with pride
if it had reindeer on the side!
Nothing is gift wrapped, or so I’m told,
so if you really want to be bold
you can open the box/es at any time,
as soon as they come will be just fine.
It’s up to you and Carol, your Mum.
I hope there’s something inside for your tum!
I hope this news will make you smile
and though you wait a little while,
I’m sure that it will be worthwhile.
🦇 The batty one!
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I’m off my knees,
I didn’t sneeze,
And now I’m ready for some cheese.
This elf to Santa will return
(and hope some merit I will earn)
with Manny and Rebecca’s wishes,
at least it isn’t stinky fishes!
🦇
Zavvi iz going to a dog groomer to havva baff and nayle klip inna littul wyle. Mum sez she iz getting too owld and kreeky to grovel onna floor ov the shower to baff him herself! She finks he leeks pee in hiz bed eether at nyte or iffn he getz exsitid wen she kumz home iff she’s had to leev us. Hiz bed iz inna washing masheen ryte now so iffn him and hiz bed nise and kleen layta and she gotta go flying them batz tunyte she kan sniff them boff wen she kum howme and see iffn they smell ov wee!
Hi Punkin. Lookin gud!
He was very stressed but not obviously too badly injured (cat attacked) so I am hoping in a week or so, after a course of antibiotics, he will be fit enough to be released if the weather co-operates.
WFUBCC - #229 - June busting out
in Cute and Funny things Greyhounds do
Posted
Gud eevning frendz.
Fank yu Miss. Nancy Mam fower showing mi frendz sum ov the plantz in ower gaardin. Ov korse boff Zavvi and me waak awl ova them plantz and wee and poo on them. It iz ower gaardin so we do wat we lyke!
Mum tooked us to see the veterinararee man tuday ‘cos I hadda lump kum upp on mi fayse and wen she luk insyde mi mowf ther a lump ova wun ov mi toofers. It did KNOT seem to be hurting and I bin krunching mi biskits OKay wiv mi dinna. Miss. Fran dryve us az Mum still gotta dodgee bak. The veterinararee man luk in mi mowf and wen he press the lumpee bit he see sum yello muk kum owt but I did KNOT mayke a fuss and it smaller then wen Mum mayke the pointmint on Fryingday so he sed to leev it and see iffn it kleer up but iffn it flare up agen I gotta havva hexray and thay problee tayke the beeg toofer owt and kleen it awl owt. No. annibionikuls ‘cos thay kutting bak on yusing them nowadays. Mum sez it jusst mor £££s in their pokkitz!
Then we boff gottid wayed and mi wayte iz purfekt butt Zavvi gotta hav hiz fudz kut down.
it passt bedtyme so I gotta go.
Gud nyte wagz to awl mi frendz,
Nutmeg.