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Missing Fish More Everyday...


Guest Kei
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I was very close with my first Greyhound, Fish. He was the sweetest boy ever and was even scared of mice. He loved cuddles and he was generally just a very quiet hound who loved to sit quietly with you for hours while you spoke to him and stroked his ears. In 2002, he got bone cancer, and had a leg amputated at the chance he may still be able to live a healthy life. 2 weeks after the operation, the cancer had spread to his chest and I had to say goodbye... being with him in the vets room on that day was the hardest and saddest thing I've ever been through.

 

That was almost three years ago now... and I still cry and get very upset whenever I think of him. I know he's in a better place now, and we had some lovely times together, but no matter how long I've been away from him it feels like my sadness will never subside and I don't know what to do, I miss him terribly. I love my current Greys to bits, but still nothing fills the hole in my heart that my Grey, Fish, filled.

Any tips for coping with loss after such a long time? Many thanks in advance.

 

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I am so sorry for your loss and I know your pain. We have to believe that we will all meet again. Know that Fish looks down upon you with so much love in his greyt big heart. :grouphug:grouphug:grouphug

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Guest GreysAndMoreGreys

So sorry for your loss.

 

The hurt and feeling of loss will never go away. I am sorry :( But with that also comes the good thoughts and remembering the funny times. Those also never go away :)

 

Please know that Fish is with good company with all the other hounds that have passed over the bridge and are waiting to see us again.

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Well, I can only say that it's hard sometimes. Some days are harder than others. They put it really well in the movie Sleepless in Seattle:

 

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Doctor Marcia Fieldstone: People who truly loved once are far more likely to love again. Sam, do you think there's someone out there you could love as much as your wife?

Sam Baldwin: Well, Dr. Marcia Fieldstone, that's hard to imagine.

Doctor Marcia Fieldstone: What are you going to do?

Sam Baldwin: Well, I'm gonna get out of bed every morning... breath in and out all day long. Then, after a while I won't have to remind myself to get out of bed every morning and breath in and out... and, then after a while, I won't have to think about how I had it great and perfect for a while.

 

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Grief is one of those things that comes in waves...each wave may be a little less intense than the one before, or maybe it will be longer between them, but they come and they touch you. I think forever.

Tami, Nikki & Gypsy (non-greyhounds, but still pretty good dogs.) Deeply missing Sunscreen Man, Angel (Back on the Job), Switzler Festus and Joe (Indio Starr)

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Guest Snowy8

Tami, that is great advice...

Its been 20 years since my elkhound Hooter died and I thought I'd never love a pupper like him again, then Sadie-Grey came along. She was my heart & soul. When she died, another piece of me died. I literally could not breathe. I woke up screaming her name. When my husband died, I don't think I ever felt the same way I did when she died.

Last year I lost 3 greyhounds & 1 little mix & with each one, another piece was chunked out of me. But I have 7 here depending on me & I go on with God's help, with my family & friends & the support & love of my greyhound friends.

All I can say for you, is reach out to God, your friends & continue loving your greys. :f_pink:gh_lay

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Guest ProudGreyMom

I am so sorry about Fish :( I understand so much how you feel. My 14 year old beagle Benny passed away just about a year ago and I still can't pull myself out of the grief. I have two gorgeous greys that I love with all my heart, but Ben was with me for such a huge part of my life. I had a memorial service for Benny at his favorite place at the beach. I think that was one thing that really helped me find some peace. I wrote his name in the sand, drew hearts, I brought photos with me to reminisce - and then I released some of his ashes into the breeze and said good-bye. I give the love I had for him to Jake and Andy now, and also put my efforts into greyhound rescue in his honor (even though he is a beagle). Also, you can go to www.petloss.com and find many links for support, light a candle for Fish - things like that.

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Guest argolola

It's very difficult. I'm so sorry for the loss of your beautiful boy.

 

I lost my cat last year after 17 1/2 years together. Some days are easier than others. I do believe we will be with them again in Heaven. That's my personal belief.

 

God bless you as your remember your sweet pup.

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Guest Jengonetothedogs

I wish I could say the sadness would go away, but I can't. But I believe your heart is bigger for knowing Fish, since you can go on to love your present companions, even if it isn't the same. I lost my first companion animal, my cat Phaedrus, a couple of months ago @ age 16, and I still find myself looking for him & crying apparently for no reason, until I realize I am looking for him. Feeling loss shows your capacity to love; but it hurts, damn it! :(:grouphug

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Oh, :grouphug , It's not goodbye, only "see you later" and although the later may seem long to you, to Fish it is only a moment since he left you. When I get sad thinking of my Popa, I try to remind myself that I KNOW that he would want memories of him to make me smile, not cry.

 

:grouphug

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Take the time to stop and smell the flowers - appreciate your everyday ordinary miracles

Carolyn, Faith, Jeff Gordon (aka Jeffy) and Oscar the chilla. Desperately missing our Stella, we'll see you later sweet girl.

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Guest Mommydog

Kei, I know exactly how you feel, I lost my lucher, Rafferty, it will be three years ago this Christmas and I still get upset. I don't think that a day has gone by since I lost him, that I have'nt thought about him and missed him. Just like your Fish he was very special to me, a once in a lifetime boy.

 

All I can really say to you is try to remember the happy times you had together. Personally I always feel that the happiness and companionship I received from Rafferty throughout his life will always outweigh the pain and sense of loss and that I was privileged to have known him.

 

Angie

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Guest eastcancoast

It's amazing how these furry souls touch us. My kitty, Kit, left 3 years ago after being with me for 14 years. She was a tiny orange tabby who I referred to as my cupboard cat because she hid there from the dogs. She would sit on the back of the couch with her front paws and head on my shoulder and watch TV with me. I do miss her, the kitties I have now don't sit with me at all they are very independent.

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Guest auntiesara

We lost three to osteosarcoma in the past 5 years and still cry when we talk about them. We adopted Piper as special needs with Heartworm and kidney failure after we lost Sweetie and Blackie. We couldn't save him but he stayed with us for a year and 1/2. It's helped me to adopt Longdog Matt(Greyhound-Saluki) who loves me very much. Maybe you can volunteer at your local rescue? Helping Greys is rewarding even if you don't adopt. I try to keep in mind that we WILL be reunited!

 

Sara

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