Selective Sa?

[maggiespet]

DH is complaining about my perfect girlie. He says that in the last 3 months or so, she has started crying by the front door whenever I leave in the evening. Unconsolably whining and crying. It drives everyone nuts and my youngest son can't sleep while she's doing this. Now honestly, I go out in the evenings maybe 3-4 times a month for a meeting or BUNKO. When I go out during the day (and no one else is home), both dogs rush to sofas as soon as I'm closing the door and sleep till I get home (I've parked down the road and looked in my back windows). So what's up with this???? My DH tries to coax her to sit with him and cuddle. But he says no way will she stay on the sofa with him. She races right back to the door to cry. Really - I just can't take her everywhere I go. And DH hates me to leave now. This is making me so sad for Maggie and my family.

 

Oh maybe this info will help someone to figure this out- I'm a SAHM and Maggie has been part of our family for 3.5 years. No big changes in our household.

[Guest happygrey]

My take is that you are her favorite in the household and she misses you when you leave. Our houndie seems fairly double bonded with both DH and me, but he often leans more toward me. I'm also a SAHM right now (but DH works from home).

 

Is she good and happy in a crate? Maybe you should try that when you leave even though others are in the house. Maybe your DH could take her out after she's settled in there and see how she does without actually seeing you leave.

 

Just thinking out loud...

[Guest MyBoys]

My DH has told me the same thing about our Henry whenever I go out in the evening, he said he lays by the back door to the garage and whines and cries, I just think he is my big old Momma's boy, DH says he tries everything to avert his attention away from the door, playing with toys, treats, whatever, but Henry just wants Mommy. Jokingly, DH said from now on I can't leave the house at night unless I take the cry baby with me.

[Guest mpportraits]

I too am a stay at home mom and have had our Phoebe girl about the same amount of time. Hubby says Phoebe "mopes" around and is miserable until I come home. Same thing! I only go out periodically for horror movie night with my girlfriends, shesh! I think they just don't want us to leave and use our girls as lures, knowing how much we love them. Sneaky guys.

[Guest dragontearz]

Guinness was horrible with SA when I first got him almost 6 years, and he still has sporadic bouts of it..if it looks like it's picking up again, I go through a few days of randomly leaving, coming back at various lengths from minutes to a few hours and when I come back inside,ignoring him for the first few minutes to let him know it's nothing out of the ordinary and that I WILL come back sooner or later..he still does it from time to time though..

[Guest AGirlNamedMe]

Bella used to whine terribly when Hef (my SO) would leave the house.

 

I've found that the whining is less if I'm up and moving around the house when he leaves. I think it distracts Bella.

 

I totally ignore the whining, but if she comes over to me, I'll love on her and give her a treat for being a good girl and not whining.

 

I've read on these boards that the whining can get worse before it gets better.

 

Good luck!

[maggiespet]

Well at least I'm not the only one with a Momma's girl!!! Maggie hasn't been crated in years so I can't fall back on that. I think I'll try a few things maybe a combo will work. When I'm leaving the house, I'm going to have DH take the dogs outside to romp. Then when they come in, he can let them work on a rawhide for a bit. That usually tires her out pretty quickly (or else she just gets bored!). We'll see how that works.

 

Thanks all for suggestions and support.

[Guest gecko_foot]

Tumnus is the same way, but it's with people in general. As long as someone is in the room with him, he'll go back to his bed and sleep. Leaving him with another dog doesn't help him at all - it just irritates the crap out of the other dog. I have never greeted him after arriving at home, and I always ignore Tumnus until he lays down in his crate and is silent for at least 2 minutes. Then I let him out like it's no big deal. Sometimes, if he's extra happy, I will sit on the couch until he lays down again. Then we go out. I've had him for almost three months, and the SA is just started to really show. I'm not sure what I did to cause it, but I'm hoping that Tumnus will limit himself to whining.

[Guest greytgrandma]

Hot Rod also has selective SA. He is just fine left alone at his own house. When we are dog sitting here at our house he is grammys boy. If I drive out to feed the horses DH says he cries the whole time Im gone.Last spring Josh went on vacation for a week and Hot Rod stayed here.I work a few hours each day.First day I go to work DH said the poor boy cried and moped the whole time(2 hours). He did get a little better each day. Thank goodness Josh just lives a few blocks away so If I need to I drop Hot Rod off at his own house for a couple hours then he is just fine.

I admit I spoil him rotten ,he demands scritches and gets them,he wants to be in whatever room I am in so I move his bed and blankies from place to place around the house. Maybe part of the problem is the first year when he would visit us I wasn't working and never left the house without Hot Rod.

Josh will probably take a weeks vacation again late spring this year.I might try giving him his kong when I leave or I will just go ahead and take him to his house and drop him off and pick him up when I get back from work. Save my baby boy the stress of grammy leaving him.