Thinking Of Dusty

[Guest Lisa_n_Dusty]

Today was a bad day for me . I also got Dusty's ashes today and plan on spreading them in a 500 acre park he always walked in. But, I also received his 2003 dog licenses in the mail. A friend of ours also sent us a beautiful sympathy card with a note attached telling us what a wonderful dog Dusty was. I keep on thinking I am doing better but, there are so many reminders. Dusty was such an awesome dog that I really don't know if the pain will ever go away. He was my DH's first dog and describes him as his best friend. I used to describe them as a boy and his dog. My DH became a healthy vibrant man again with Dusty's love. He almost died from high blood pressure and liver disease. When Dusty came into our lives, my dh walked him in rain or snow. He was so commited in keeping Dusty healthy he didn't realize that he was doing the same for himself.

We just had too many reminders in one day. I keep on thinking all I need is another greyhound but, I know my dh just can't right now. It is tearing me up inside knowing there's a grey out there that needs me!! I'm sorry about my ranting I just needed to write something down cause I am so sad today.

[greyhoundlov]

Maybe it's time to suggest fostering to your DH. It's so hard when your daily life has dozens of reminders of your babies you lose--some more subtle than others. Keep your chin up and remind DH there are greys out there that need you both. He might reconsider.

[Greybud]

I know this is hard time for you guys Lisa. Hugs from my heart!

[Guest TorynUs]

I know what you mean about reminders.....when our schnauzer passed away this past June, her ashes were ready to be picked up ON her birthday. It was so difficult. I kept telling myself through the tears that I was happy she was back with us on her bday, but it still was very hard to deal with. It does take a long time (at least it did for me) to be able to really even discuss her without breaking into tears. We weren't sure we were even going to get another dog, and then greys entered our life. And now, we are so happy to come home once again to a smiling canine face that greets us with wiggles. Maybe sometime soon your DH may decide he needs that once again in his life. As far as the license renewal, a similar thing happened with us: they sent us the reminder and I had to send it back saying she was deceased. It brought the sadness all back to me and sending the notice back to them made it all very final. I cried like crazy. There are times I still cry and always will from missing her; she was such a sweetheart and had been through everything with our family. But we decided on another dog because they do bring such joy and we had to come to the realization that, yes, there will be sadness again too someday. But we didn't want to miss all the good times of being a pet owner just to avoid the inevitable---the future loss of another. I hope maybe at some point your DH can open his heart to another. It is helpful and therapeutic too, especially knowing how the greys really need us. Good luck to you all.

Edited January 25, 2003 by Tory n Us

[MilliesMom]

I understand the therapeutic nature of a dog because I have a difficult health condition, too. It makes it much worse not to have an animal around, but I really believe that I'm just becoming ready emotionally to open my house and my heart again, and it's been 5 months since Millie's passed.

What's helped me when times are tough is going to the site where they have the Monday night Rainbow Bridge ceremony around the world. Lighting candles and praying for my Bridgekids and for the other ones who've passed or have special needs right now has helped enormously. It's held at 10 p.m. EST. You also can post Dusty's name there. The database holds over 60,000 names of Bridgekids from around the world.

Someone suggested fostering, and IMHO, that would not be the right thing to do because you'd have another dog that would be leaving you. With us, about a month after Millie died, my son and I went to a meet-and-greet to see how it felt. I didn't want to try to see Millie's face among the hounds there.

There simply isn't an easy way to get through this time, and my heart goes out to you and your dear Dusty's family.

Hang in there. It will get better.

[Guest lillysmum]

I know the pain you're going thru, and you will know when it's right to get another grey. I firmly believe that all dogs once they've passed know our pain, and that they send another to help us when it's the best time.

 

For some ppl, that's almost immediately. But for others it can take weeks, months or longer. Nobody can tell you how long it takes.

 

You have my deepest sympathy in this awful time. Be reminded of Dusty, try remembering the good times. I know this can be tough, but you can do it.

 

The first days and weeks after we lost Aussie were awful. And I still miss him every day. Nothing will ever take that away.

 

But we have three wonderful dogs in our lives right now, that we have to love and cherish for who they are. Aussie knows he can never be replaced, but that our new girls are our way of trying to fill the big gap left when Aussie passed.

 

Since the devastating fires last weekend, I try to remember that so many animals have been killed, and that we need to love our girls and remember that they're special. You just never know when they might be taken from us.

 

Be kind to yourself, it takes time to grieve. Dusty would be proud.

[StridersSis]

Remind yourself and your husband that time heals all wounds, When Dusty feels your ready he will send another grey your way to help with that healing process. Winnie sent me Dallas and although he will never replace her he helps everyday Im starting to be able to see her and smile. A recommendation to you would be some volunteer work. If I hadn't volunteered I would have never met Dallas. So maybe you can contact a local rescue and volunteer and only if its just sitting in a cage working with a dog it would be very theraputic for both you and the dog. That might be the best step for you and your husband it will allow him to open his heart up a little and see there are more greys out there looking for forever homes and when it comes time the right one will be there.