CityGrey

Hi everyone! been a stressful couple of days. Alfie and I were running around and he took a turn, shrieked nonstop, emergency vet immediately. he broke his tibia right at the knee by dislocating his femur. took him to a referral hospital that took him in for the long weekend. Turns out he has cancer and they amputated the leg. The cancer has not spread and we caught it “early” but I have NO idea what to expect or how to care for him after surgery. Any suggestions, advice, information, what to buy, etc. would be incredible if you could share it!

I did a combo of two things. The shelter I adopted from said to lose the harness because they don't like being tugged from under their arms. So I hold the leash upright (kind of like you see in dog shows) and make sure the collar is up at the top of his neck. Without looking back, I take 2-3 steps forward and let him decide if he is going to follow me or not. He sometimes stops completely and refuses. At which point, I do not turn around and just take a step back and pat him and say "you are totally fine and you have done this before". Not that he understand all of that, haha but saying that keeps my tone matter of fact and encouraging instead of comforting (they can absolutely tell the difference). The other thing that helped a lot was going out through the garage. I kind of do the same approach if he refuses to step out, but starting to jog actually really helps him. I posted on a different forum and they said that jogging really takes their attention down to one thing - running next to you - instead of all the other stimuli they could be distracted by. Turning around and letting him pull me back to the apartment was hurting more than helping. If that happens, I literally squat next to him for as long as he needs to show him we are not going anywhere. Eventually he will move. If he moves back to the elevator, I take two steps with him and then try to circle back to the front door with the same collar and stepping technique. I really don't like doing it sometimes when he is really hating the idea, but if he has been holding it in that long, then it just needs to happen. I stopped carrying him though since that seemed to make things a lot worse honestly. Alternatively, I take him out early in the morning through the garage to get him to a grassy patch around the corner from the garage door and he will pee there which is enough for me. He comes in to get fed, then we go out around 11 and again at 3. The two times during the day we go out, I load him in the truck and we go to a park where he can take a longer walk and find a tree to bump up against and poop. I don't get the appeal, but he seems to really have it against trees (or maybe it's out of love haha) All that to say, comforting him and giving in to him when he wanted to turn around made things worse, but also carrying him and forcing him out was not helpful. The different forum also had a couple of people mention that their greys literally only go out once a day and they are perfectly fine with that. I think letting go of the fear that they will hurt themselves and they will really tell you when they have to go out is helpful too (for the human haha). There is a happy balance in there somewhere for your grey. Reassuring talk and "bold" steps forward with them by your side makes them follow. It is really hard when you want them to feel safe, but they will feel safe if you show them it IS safe. Waiting him out is also helpful (in my experience) although it takes A LOT of time. One time it took 47 min of me squatting in different areas of the lobby to get him to go out. I hope that helps! oh! And I almost forgot to mention. A few times having a dog on the other side of the door in the lobby is super helpful. They will be immediately curious and sometimes that is enough to tug a bit to get them to go out. If you have a friend in the building (great time to make friends!) that has a non leash reactive dog that wouldn't mind standing outside to show your grey it is ok, that is helpful. If you go this route, remember to switch it up a bit. Have the other dog right in front of the door sometimes, and then other times on the sidewalk or around the corner of a wall or something so your grey will walk out "wondering" or "searching" for the other dog. Sometimes that is enough for them to forget they are afraid and they will just go out

Hi everyone! I am looking for advice or to hear if anyone has had similar stories with their grey adjusting to living in a city. (TLDR; Alfie was great the first 5 days in the city, he has regressed a lot and is refusing to go out. I tried many methods and have not succeeded. I feel I am making things worse and he is continuing to hold his pee/poop for 18+ hours even though he wants to go out) I recently adopted Alfie - retired racer. He’s 4 years old and was adopted once before me in March of 2020 I believe, was returned at some point in the late fall (the owner had medical expenses she did not foresee). I adopted him a few months later. I live downtown so there is little grass immediately surrounding us but there are a lot of parks <10min drive away (he hates getting in the truck so it limits our options). I usually walk him down to the river (5 min walk) where there is a small park with a decent amount of grass and trees. The first day home was rough adjusting since he had never been in a high rise building, but he got used to the elevator the same day, would go out without hesitation, would do his business after a 20min walk of sniffing, etc. There are grassy patches here and there where a lot of other dogs relieve around the building and he followed suit. I got him to walk all the way down to the river park the first day twice. The routine was clear and well defined - wake up at 6, go on a walk, breakfast at 7, walk at 11:30, get a dental treat after the longer walk, go out again at 4 for a quick walk, then go out again at 10:30. We did this for 4 days just fine. Then he started getting scared at our 4pm walk since there was more traffic (I am assuming) and then he started avoiding his night time walk. I got a little more firm with the leash and insisted he at least cross the street when we were in front of the building. Sometimes it would take a few nudges and encouragement, but he would pee and then we would go back. This past Thursday he refused to pee since his 6am walk, so I was much more forceful at 10pm for him to go out (shortened the leash and walked not letting him freeze). Since then, he has refused to go out the front door in the lobby entirely. I have been trying with a lot of patience, with treats, chicken, etc. He won’t budge. Friday he went out in the morning but refused to potty at all. He finally did at 3:30pm which was the second time we went out (third attempt). Saturday morning we went out at 6 and we would not get past the lobby door. I tried for the second time at 8am (an hour after his breakfast) and he wouldn’t budge. There is a front desk lady at my building and he went out with her with A LOT of encouragement. He wouldn’t leave her side until he realized he was outside and then booked it back into the building. He still didn’t pee but it was clear he needed to because he tried on a fake plant in the lobby. He came back in with her and stayed at her side for another while trying to avoid the elevator. I finally took him out through the garage - we ran down the ramp twice and on the second try, he finally peed in a patch of grass behind the garage structure. He realized he was under an overpass after 2 min and freaked out (cried and tried to jog away) so we came back in through the garage. Sunday morning - same story. We would get to the lobby and he would shy away and wait for the elevator to come get him. He didn't go out in the morning, we tried the garage, etc. - nothing. I fed him and ignored him for a bit. He clearly needed to go out so I would take him down to the lobby or to the garage a few times. On our 6th attempt of the day, he finally jogged down the garage ramp and we ended up jogging close to 2 miles. He peed on literally everything and pooped fine. But he chose the BUSIEST street to jog down which was odd. Monday morning (today) - it was clear he needed to go out. He kept whining and laying down near the door. He kept tooting haha so I know he needed to go out. Each time we tried, he wouldn't budge. By 8am we tried 3 separate times. My friend who has had 9 greys said that I should just try carrying him out until he gets too embarrassed and chooses to walk. Alfie is 80lbs and not easy for me to carry, but I got him down the ramp and we went on a jog. Got to the park by the river and peed on everything. Tail was even up and happy! When it came time to turn around, he was more hesitant. At one point - SO close to the apartment - he froze. I had to carry him half a block and then he finally started walking. Out of fear he would freeze again, I started jogging and he seemed to follow suit. Once we reached the busy street, he seemed to start running out of fear and no longer from a calm jog. He still needs to go out and has been whining, but each time we go to the lobby, he refuses. Now that the novel (sorry for venting a bit) is done, my question is if anyone has any techniques or exercises I can learn to get him out of a freezing state. When he is scared, his nose drips. When he gets more scared he looks away and starts turning away from whatever he is afraid of. Next is hiding. Eventually he either shakes out of fear, or he skips straight to completely freezing and not moving at all. No amount of food or treats can catch his attention at all. I’m not sure how I can get him to calm down in those states at all. Obviously nudging or tugging on his harness is out of the question now, so I’m struggling to figure out what options I have left short of rewarding him for taking a single step towards the door (which I did this weekend and it did not help) or whatever I am trying to get him to do. He is also fine in the house - no accidents and he learned two commands fairly well already (“out” to get out of the kitchen, and “stay” right before he gets fed) I’m not sure why the regression is happening, but I don’t want him to hold in his pee for 20-24 hours again. Saturday I had to force him in the truck and take him to the park where he had a great time, but hated getting back in the truck where I pushed him in at that point. He now refuses to look at any door near the garage to walk down the ramp and he will no longer acknowledge the truck's existence. I am not sure what options I have left or if I am making matters worse with my methods, but I am not sure how to handle the regression. I can't have him continue to hold things in for 18+ hours KNOWING he needs to go out. Any help or advice would be much appreciated. Or if you have any recommendations on trainers that specialize in this in new hampshire, that would be amazing. If you read this far, haha I very much appreciate your time!