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Aggression towards eldest daughter


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Hi all!   Advice/help please!  We adopted Slick last August. He's a very friendly greyhound, that has mostly settled in quite well after an adjustment period where he did show some aggression/growling when we approached him laying, but that seems to have gone now.  My eldest daughter moved away to university in September shortly after we got him and has come home many times throughout the year for a weekend visit. One of the first times we picked her up in the car and Slick was in the backseat with her and growled at her. Scared her, but he had his muzzle on so no harm done.  Then I was away for an afternoon so had asked her to feed him when she moved back in April. He growled and snapped at her and terrified her.  A few sleep startles as well as her schedule is late, but he sleeps in a crate so if he growls when she comes home late it's not dangerous. She's now been home for months and his hackles go up and tail between legs and he fixates on her when she's around, especially in the kitchen, but pretty much anywhere.  Our adoption person suggested tethering and her doing all the feeding, but this is not really an option since she's not home all the time and she's also terrified of him.  I've tried having her feed him while I hold him on the leash with muzzle on, he still growls (Firm NO and a tug was suggested ).  Then we tried having her toss high value treats to him (bits of hot dog) when she sees him, which he's quite agreeable to, but she's still scared and it can't be in the kitchen.  It was suggested that he's resource guarding ME, but I'm not sure this is the case.  I realize that her intermittent schedule is making it more difficult, but I need some help. She's moving out again in a month and I don't want to her to be scared every time she comes home for a weekend.  It's also very out of character for Slick as he is very friendly with all other people, my youngest regularly feeds and walks him as does my partner.  He does growl and snap at other dogs when they sniff him, but we just avoid that so isn't an issue often....  Any suggestions/advice/help much appreciated.

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Couple things.

First, true aggression in dogs is really rare.  What's happening is your dog trying to express himself in some of the only ways he has to communicate how he's feeling - anxious and upset and fearful.  Growls and snapping look and sound really horrible to us, but to dogs they are just things they have to do to communicate to us humans who don't really take the time to learn how to speak dog.  We miss their more subtle cues and body language so they have to move to more direct means of communicating.  And the more a human doesn't hear and understand the more direct they feel they have to be.  

Somewhere in the beginning of your daughter's and your dog's relationship, something happened.  It doesn't matter what, or when, or how but she missed a cue, missed hearing what he was trying to tell her, and a big misunderstanding happened.  It's a big fail in the area of building trust.  So that's what your daughter needs to concentrate on now - rebuilding a sense of trust and connection between her and Slick.  It's going to be harder because she's not going to have daily contact with him for long periods of time.  It may be that they will only have a marginal relationship going forward, but safely coexisting while she's home with you is probably going to be a goal right now.

Number one - do not punish him for trying to communicate how he feels.  Just accept that he's going to growl and that it's NOT him "being aggressive" towards your daughter.  For whatever reason, she makes him anxious, so he's going to try and protect himself.  It's nothing personal.  It's dog communication.  He's to the point now where he feels he has to guard important things from her - his food, his bed, other people he's bonded with (you).  So it's going to take time and work to get through that level of anxiety.

Number two - don't force them to interact.  Slick is way beyond the point where techniques like feeding and walking will be effective in promoting bonding.  He doesn't trust her.  She needs to earn that trust.  She needs to back away and pretty much ignore him for any personal interactions.  No petting, no attention, no feeding, no walking.   Give Slick a big bubble of his personal space.  While she's home, she needs to carry small, one-bite-size, very yummy treats (dried liver, or human jerky bites, or anything he likes that's easy to carry and he can chomp down fast) with her all the time around the house.  Every time she comes into a room where Slick is, even just passing through, she needs to toss him a treat or two - with no eye contact.  He needs to come to a place where he looks forward to her coming into or passing through a room where he is.  Give him a safe spot to retreat to if he gets to feeling overwhelmed, and watch his body language to know when to give him a break there.

She will probably need to restart this process several times if she's home and gone, home and gone.  Dogs have good memories, but trust is a short term item.  

When they have a base of bonding, then you can add in feeding and walking and other bonding activities between them.

Number three - this sounds like it's more than a daughter-dog issue.  He may be a particularly anxious dog over all, or just having trouble really adapting to home life.  His leash reactivity with other dogs is a big clue there.  To gain some insight and some techniques which will transfer to many situations, get the book "Feisty Fido: Help for the Leash Reactive Dog" by Patricia McConnell.  She's a very good animal behaviorist who writes excellent step-by-step instructions about how to help our canine friends live with us.   He also seems to be a resource guarder.  There are tons on thread here on GT about resource guarding you can search for and read through for ideas and techniques.  There will be some overlap, too.

Number four - this is going to be hard for your daughter.  She's already fearful, and it's natural to be afraid when faced with a dog who doesn't seem to like you at all.  Helping her be calm and courageous and be less anxious in herself is going to be important.  Slick is picking up on her anxiety, adding it to his own, and they're just bouncing anxiety back and forth.  You may do better finding a good canine behaviorist in your area who's familiar with greyhounds and anxiety reactions to work with everyone in person.  Ask your vet and your adoption group for recommendations for certified, positive reinforcement only training, behaviorists.

Good luck!

Chris - Mom to: Felicity (DeLand), and Andi (Braska Pandora)

52592535884_69debcd9b4.jpgsiggy by Chris Harper, on Flickr

Angels: Libby (Everlast), Dorie (Dog Gone Holly), Dude (TNJ VooDoo), Copper (Kid's Copper), Cash (GSI Payncash), Toni (LPH Cry Baby), Whiskey (KT's Phys Ed), Atom, Lilly

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Thank you so much for that thoughtful and detailed response!  We are using the bits of hot dog for my daughter, but that's been just a couple of times a day as well - and as said Slick is quite agreeable to that. Will give her a pouch to have on her all the time, and will check out the book you suggested as well (Slick is fine walking and not dog reactive at all, he just doesn't like being sniffed - which we were told about when we got him).  Thanks again!

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