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One Year Without My Wizard & My Heart Is Still So Broken


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Aw, Kerry, you are incredibly eloquent, perceptive and sensitive. I'm so sorry that eloquence is describing the anguish and loss you feel every day. But you make us understand that pain, and let you know that we share it. I hope that helps just a little. And, as always, thank-you for sharing your magical Merlin with us.

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Nancy, Mom to Evangelina, Kiva and Laila
Missing Lacey, Patsy, Buster, my heart dog Nick, Winnie, Pollyanna, Tess, my precious Lydia, Calvin Lee, and kitties Lily, Sam and Simon
My Etsy shop: http://www.etsy.com/shop/Catsburgandhoundtown

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The Wizard. :brokenheart

 

He had the best eyes.

Standard Poodle Daisy (12/13); Greys Hildy (Braska Hildy 7/10), Toodles (BL Toodles 7/09), Opal (Jax Opal 7/08)
Missing Cora (RL Nevada 5/99-10/09), Piper (Cee Bar Easy 2/99-1/10), Tally (Thunder La La 9/99-3/10), Edie (Daring Reva 9/99-10/12), Dixie (Kiowa Secret Sue 11/01-1/13), Jessie (P's Real Time 11/98-3/13), token boy Graham (Zydeco Dancer 9/00-5/13), Cal (Back Already 12/99-11/13), Betsy (Back Kick Beth 11/98-12/13), Standard Poodles Minnie (1/99-1/14) + Perry (9/98-2/14), Annie (Do Marcia 9/03-10/14), Pink (Miss Pinky Baker 1/02-6/15), Poppy (Cmon Err Not 8/05-1/16), Kat (Jax Candy 5/05-5/17), Ivy (Jax Isis 10/07-7/21)

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My thoughts are with you. You expressed so beautifully how I feel about losing both Ben and. Brooke and there's no doubt the journey is so painful without our pups.

 

I always feel grief is like a tsunami; some days it knocks you over and you wonder if you'll survive while other times you learn to swim with the tide. On the other hand, it's heartwarming to know that we can love and grieve at the same time.

Jan with precious pups Emmy (Stormin J Flag) and Simon (Nitro Si). Missing my angels: Bailey Buffetbobleclair 11/11/98-17/12/09; Ben Task Rapid Wave 5/5/02-2/11/15; Brooke Glo's Destroyer 7/09/06-21/06/16 and Katie Crazykatiebug 12/11/06 -21/08/21. My blog about grief The reality is that you will grieve forever. You will not get over the loss of a loved one; you will learn to live with it. You will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered. You will be whole again but you will never be the same. Nor should you be the same, nor would you want to. Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

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This loss was devastating for you, and I'm so very sorry. I don't know if they are spirits or they are memories, but I do know that we can summon or just be open to the feeling/character of those departed ones as though they were right in the room. I hope you can experience Merlin that way. As long as you can remember his essence, he'll never be entirely gone. :bighug

Mary with Jumper Jack (2/17/11) and angels Shane (PA's Busta Rime, 12/10/02 - 10/14/16) and Spencer (Dutch Laser, 11/25/00 - 3/29/13).

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Kerry, I am so incredibly sorry, Merlin was one of my favorites on GT and I had a huge crush on him. Grieving the losses of both Sagan and Merlin so close together must be devastating for you, your video brought tears to my eyes :(. So many of us have travelled this journey of grief and it is authentic to each loss. I have not been on GT in some time as I have lost all 3 of my Greyhounds, Flower only 9 months ago. I have joined a group on FB for grief called Greyhound Grief Support and now am an Administrator on the Forum, I joined when my 1st Grey Max passed, I felt devastated by his loss and this group has truly helped. I am of the belief that we will see our loved ones again when we pass. Sending huge hugs and healing energy for your heart :f_red:f_red

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Roberta & Michael with Furkids- Flower (Shasta Flowers 6/7/06) & Rascal the kitty - Missing our sweet angels - Max(M's Mad Max) 10/12/02 - 12/3/15, Sara (Sara Raves 6/30/01 - 4/13/12) Queenie & Pandora the kitties - gone but never forgotten

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  • 2 weeks later...

Don't know if you revisit your Post. I watched Merlins video. it was so beautiful. Sorry if I was harsh in my previous post. Oh how you loved him and still miss him so much. I know too the feeling of the deep crevice in your heart having lost two of my babies last year Please accept my heartfelt sympathy.

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He was your heart hound and he has a special place in your heart meant for him alone.

I know your pain. I lost my heart hound Luka (my profile photo) suddenly in January of last year. I miss him with every breath I take but I am comforted to know that Luka and I have been together for thousands of years and will always be connected. This is what he told my animal communicator. The last time I checked in with him he told me I need to move on. I adopted a new little girl 3 months after he left me. She has many of his mannerisms which makes me smile. He told me is by her side guiding her and telling her all the little things he used to do that made me smile.

You will be together again, I have no doubt. And to him it will seem like you were apart for minutes.

Sending gentle hugs your way,

Jan, Carter and Neko

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He was your heart hound and he has a special place in your heart meant for him alone.

I know your pain. I lost my heart hound Luka (my profile photo) suddenly in January of last year. I miss him with every breath I take but I am comforted to know that Luka and I have been together for thousands of years and will always be connected. This is what he told my animal communicator. The last time I checked in with him he told me I need to move on. I adopted a new little girl 3 months after he left me. She has many of his mannerisms which makes me smile. He told me is by her side guiding her and telling her all the little things he used to do that made me smile.

You will be together again, I have no doubt. And to him it will seem like you were apart for minutes.

Sending gentle hugs your way,

Jan, Carter and Neko

I just have to applaud this post. It is TRUTH. When my animal communication mentor spoke to my soul mate Slim after he crossed over it was at a seminar. Slim was asked 'how long was he with me'? Slim replied: "All my life." YES! They are indeed with us forever. Always connected. Just like with your Luka my Slim is always with me. He is always interacting with me and giving me reassuring signs. It is true. They are spirits. Their body may have died but them-the real them that is spirit and that we loved-lives on still connected to us-albeit in a different realm. :beatheart

Edited by racindog
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  • 2 weeks later...

It is very sad Kerry that your sweet boy has been gone a year already. I always wanted to meet him when we moved to Kennebunk full time but alas that never came to be. He was and always will be your heart hound and there is nothing as painful as having to say goodbye. He will always be with though, always.

Kyle with Stewie ('Super C Ledoux, Super C Sampson x Sing It Blondie) and forever missing my three angels, Jack ('Roy Jack', Greys Flambeau x Miss Cobblepot) and Charlie ('CTR Midas Touch', Leo's Midas x Hallo Argentina) and Shelby ('Shari's Hooty', Flying Viper x Shari Carusi) running free across the bridge.

Gus an coinnich sinn a'rithist my boys and little girl.

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  • 4 weeks later...

I missed this post Kerry......understand completely how much you're missing your boys.

 

Must confess I had such a soft spot for Merlin (being ever so slightly biased about white furry houndies). Much love sent to you.

Run free our beloved Sir Snowy, Pip, Queenie, Sadie, Tess & Rosie until we meet again......I would rather feel the thorn than to never see the rose

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  • 1 month later...

I just saw your post because unfortunately today I had to write a post about Lola. I totally remember Merlin....he was very memorable on GT for me. I think you posted a picture of the "stink eye" once and it really cracked me up. it was really cute. i just wanted to wish you peace and i understand and relate to your intense sorrow. I'm glad Lola has a guy like Merlin waiting for her across the bridge. :brokenheart:angelwings

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  • 3 weeks later...

Kerry,

I'm thinking about you because I just got sucker punched.

Mercury and I were sitting in the brown chair. It's been so warm that we haven't snuggled a lot but it was nice. For some reason, I reached over and sniffed his feet. It was Frito feet! He rarely has that but my Liberty, my :heart dog, had the all the time. I'd lay on the floor with her and stroe her ears and sniff her paws. All was right int he world. :gh_child

Don't get me wrong. I love my Mercury. He's my boy. But Liberty was my heart dog. :unsure

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Missing my heart dog Liberty, the world's best blackngreylabhound

 

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