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Not What I Wanted To Hear


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I took Chase to Auburn for his oncology consultation Wednesday. I went in ready to proceed with amputation and chemotherapy hoping to get him into the clinical trial they were doing. What they found on his examination not only excluded him from being a candidate for the clinical trial, it also took away all my hopes for any more time with him.

The end of his left femur toward the knee is so deteriorated it his highly prone to fracture. That in itself was not the worse news. On his examination they also discovered a large abdominal aortic thrombus, which not only excluded him a candidate for the clinical trial, but left me with no option, but to let him go. I can take away the pain from the cancer by amputation and hopefully slow its progression with chemotherapy, but there is nothing that can be done about the thrombus or to predict when it becomes fatal. Knowing what Nadir's death was like I can't leave Chase facing the same thing not knowing when it will occur or if I will even be home when it occurs.

I made a promise to Nadir to love Chase with all my heart. Today at 4:30 I will be fulfilling the hard part of that promise and saying goodbye to my sweet boy. My heart is crushed knowing the emptiness that awaits me. :cry :weep

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My thoughts are with you today

Jan with precious pups Emmy (Stormin J Flag) and Simon (Nitro Si) and Abbey Field.  Missing my angels: Bailey Buffetbobleclair 11/11/98-17/12/09; Ben Task Rapid Wave 5/5/02-2/11/15; Brooke Glo's Destroyer 7/09/06-21/06/16 and Katie Crazykatiebug 12/11/06 -21/08/21. My blog about grief The reality is that you will grieve forever. You will not get over the loss of a loved one; you will learn to live with it. You will rebuild yourself around the loss you have suffered. You will be whole again but you will never be the same. Nor should you be the same, nor would you want to. Elisabeth Kübler-Ross

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I'm so sorry. :( You and your Chase are in my thoughts and prayers.

...............Chase (FTH Smooth Talker), Morgan (Cata), Reggie (Gable Caney), Rufus
(Reward RJ). Fosters check in, but they don't check out.
Forever loved -- Cosmo (System Br Mynoel), March 11, 2002 - October 8, 2009.
Miss Cosmo was a lady. And a lady always knows when to leave.

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{{Judy}} We are here for you. Please give Chase a hug and a smooch from me. He knows how desperately you love him. He really does. :grouphug

Old Dogs are the Best Dogs. :heartThank you, campers. Current enrollees:  Punkin. AnnIE Oooh M

Angels: Pal :heart. Segugio. Sorella (TPGIT). LadyBug. Zeke-aroni. MiMi Sizzle Pants. Gracie. Seamie :heart:brokenheart. (Foster)Sweet. Andy. PaddyALVIN!Mayhem. Bosco. Bruno. Dottie B. Trevor Double-Heart. Bea. Cletus, KLTO. Aiden 1-4.

:paw Upon reflection, our lives are often referenced in parts defined by the all-too-short lives of our dogs.

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I am so sorry. How devastating. This has been a horrible week for our pups with osteo. My thoughts are with you today. Hoping for a peaceful passing for Chase and peace for you Judy with time. :grouphug

gallery_12662_3351_862.jpg

Jen, CPDT-KA with Zuri, lab in a greyhound suit, Violet, formerly known as Faith, Skye, the permanent puppy, Cisco, resident cat, and my baby girl Neyla, forever in my heart

"The great thing about science is that you're free to disagree with it, but you'll be wrong."

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So many hugs and schnoofs for you from us. :cry1:cry1

Current Crew: Gino-Gene-Eugene! (Eastnor Rebel: Makeshift x Celtic Dream); Fuzzy the Goo-Goo Girl (BGR Fuzzy Navel: Boc's Blast Off x Superior Peace); Roman the Giant Galoot! (Imark Roman: Crossfire Clyde x Shana Wookie); Kitties Archie and Dixie

Forever Missed: K9 Sasha (2001-2015); Johnny (John Reese--Gable Dodge x O'Jays) (2011-19); the kitties Terry and Bibbi; and all the others I've had the privilege to know

36938152140_1a2fd29a1f.jpg

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I am so very sorry :( :(

Kim and Bruce - with Rick (Rick Roufus 6/30/16) and missing my sweet greyhound Angels Rainey (LG's Rainey 10/4/2000 - 3/8/2011), Anubis (RJ's Saint Nick 12/25/2001 - 9/12/12) and Zeke (Hey Who Whiz It 4/6/2009 - 7/20/2020) and Larry (PTL Laroach 2/24/2007 - 8/2/2020) -- and Chester (Lab) (8/31/1990 - 5/3/2005), Captain (Schipperke) (10/12/1992 - 6/13/2005) and Remy (GSP) (?/?/1998 - 1/6/2005) at the bridge
"Always do sober what you said you'd do drunk. That will teach you to keep your mouth shut." -- Ernest Hemmingway

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I'm so very sorry and keep you in my thoughts.

Sorry for butchering the english language. I try to keep the mistakes to a minimum.

 

Nadine with Paddy (Zippy Mullane), Saoirse (Lizzie Be Nice), Abu (Cillowen Abu) and bridge angels Colin (Dessies Hero) and Andy (Riot Officer).

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Well, crap, Judy. I'm so, so sorry you won't have more time with Chase. {{{HUGS}}}

Chris - Mom to: Felicity (DeLand), and Andi (Braska Pandora)

52592535884_69debcd9b4.jpgsiggy by Chris Harper, on Flickr

Angels: Libby (Everlast), Dorie (Dog Gone Holly), Dude (TNJ VooDoo), Copper (Kid's Copper), Cash (GSI Payncash), Toni (LPH Cry Baby), Whiskey (KT's Phys Ed), Atom, Lilly

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http://www.thebibleandanimals.org/index.php/articles-catlist/2-will-animals-be-in-heaven

 

My husband sent me the above link when we lost our San Tan Snuggles to GME. Four of our grey fur babies have moved on.

 

We have no doubt that they will be there to greet us one day when we too go home,

 

Our prayers are with you and Chase.

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