How Long Did It Take Your Greyhound To Bond With You?

[Guest KEW]

Hi everybody!

 

I am writing this because I'm a little bit concerned about my hound's bonding process. My DH and I have had him for about 6 weeks and in many ways he has settled in to our routine very well. He doesn't seem to be very interested in either of us, though. He is often very aloof toward us like he just doesn't care much about the people he is living with.

 

When we take him on walks (he walks pretty well on a lead) he is far more interested in every other person he sees. When a neighbor stops to talk, it can actually be difficult to pull him away from the person. He is always friendly toward new people, but his advances may not always be wanted. So we would like him to be more focused on us.

 

We got him into a positive reinforcement training class hoping that it will help with the bonding. It has been a week of steady work with him and there really hasn't been much improvement. He is finally learning his name, though! We were just wondering if anybody else has had this problem or do you feel like by now you and your dog had started developing a bond? Does he just need more time? Part of me wonders if he just isn't the right dog for us. He's not a bad dog, but he's definitely not a loyal companion.

[Time4ANap]

6 weeks is no time at all. Everything he sees is new and he is curious to learn, so is interested in every new person, place or thing.

 

A year from now he will be a totally different, settled-in hound, but he may or may not cuddle, may or may not play with toys, and may or may not be bonded to you. In most cases they bond very well with their owners, but there are always some who think like a cat and consider you to be the hired help. You will most likely come to find that to be his endearing trait if that happens and laugh about it. The personalities are as different as human personalities.

 

Just give him time. Do some clicker training to engage him or maybe try some of the interactive toys that dispense treats, but most of all, give him time to adjust to what is a whole new world to him.

 

Good luck!

[greysmom]

Each dog is different and will adjust in their own time and to their own level of comfort. Remember too, this breed has been bred for centuries to be independent hunters and thinkers. They are bred to compete individually, and not to work in a pack, or to look to a human hunter for direction or approval. Six weeks is a blink of time to overcome all that.

 

Couple things - If he is food motivated during your training sessions, but sort of lacksadaisical about it, you may need to seriously up your treat value. Find something that he thinks is YUMMYYUMYUMYUM! Not just yum. Also, you should keep session short and fun - 5 mins or so, several times a day work better than one or two long sessions. Some greyhounds respond better/faster to clicker training, also.

 

Thing - What he's doing and how he's behaving all sound really normal to me. Remember he's not a lab or a golden who is going to be super responsive to humans right from the get-go. But he will probably become more friendly as time goes along. It's just too soon to tell, one way or another.

 

Another thing - there are things you can do to help him bond with you: take him places for walks (different places away from your neighborhood) as long as he's comfortable doing that; hand feed him his meals; have him sleep in your bedroom with you (dog bed on the floor is fine) - they want to be with their packmates; don't overload him with affection at this point (he will either come to want it or he won't, on his own), but offer him quiet moments; sit next to him and read quietly - or read out loud gently; get a Zoom Groom and brush him all over - most greys love to be brushed.

 

Most of all, give him patience and time. It just takes some of them longer than others. And their personalities change so much during the first year.

 

Good luck!

[Hubcitypam]

Some (oddly enough all dogs straight from the track) walked in bonded, cockroached and made themselves at home the first night. I've had others where we basically just co-existed and they never felt the love despite my best efforts.

[KickReturn]

A little better every day for almost 4 years, and still improving.

 

It can take a long time for a dog to completely trust its owner. Give the dog space and time. Going on adventures together was what worked for us.

 

I recommend against hand feeding, it can be stressful for the dog. I tried it and after the fourth peice of meat, my dog refused and tapped his bowl with his snout as if to say "put it in here buddy". Later I learned he was very concerned about having his teeth make contact with me. Treats are fine but a proper meal should be left to the dog. Other dogs may be different.

[smurfette]

I always tell "my" adoptants to imagine what it would like to be if I grabbed them, put them on a spaceplane and left them on mars. So, this is your new home. Have fun.

 

Your grey may be living with you but his personality needs a little more time to arrive. One of my boys needed almost two years and all of us moving to a new home to learn to trust me or even come to me on his own. Don't get me wrong, I love all of them like crazy, but when Andy climbs the couch for a cuddle - that are the most special moments for me.

[Guest Cutedogname]

I am only a total newcomer but I know that feeling. Our girl has been with us for almost four painful and lovely weeks and she is really aloof at the moment. At first I was really concerned about her lack of bonding. Now, I am just taking every day as different and thinking that she is teaching me more than I'll teach her. I have no discipline for myself for example, but this is where the dog comes in with her need for routine. I think she is just an independent character, which to be honest actually fits in well with me and my partner.

 

I digress. Our girl is such a lovel well-behaved girl...to everyone but me and sometimes my partner. To me, she is excited (for food or walks probably!!) when I return home, and excited to see me in the morning, but basically unless I have a treat in my hand, she doesn't even act interested and barely acknowledges my existance!

 

When she came to us I started just giving her lots of pats, but she just stands there, as if she has been trained to stand on the spot emotionless. I started thinking that maybe she was just there because of training and not because of actual enjoyment, so I started training her to slightly nudge my hand with her nose to indicate that she wanted me to continue. Now, when she does that I feel I know that she is wanting contact with me. It does feel weird though, given that I LOVE dogs and feel like we have adopted a stuck up cat!

 

Also, she LOVES other people! Whenever we have friends over, she greets them like they are long lost friends, and just snuggles into them while they pat her. It's hard to watch!! But I think because we have to be the people who are training her to be a pet, then I can't really expect that she'll feel the same way about me right now.

 

It's subtle, but the ways I notice that she is actually interested in me are when we finish a walk and I give her a brush, she loves it so much and then she turns to me and kind of leans against me. Like I said, it's subtle.

 

So...I think the things that are working for me are taking her for walks (with the treats/clicker) and brushing her after her walks. It's very small progress, but I have to concede that I suppose I prefer this to the opposite "love me, love me, look at me, play with me, throw the stick, throw the stick, throw the ball...etc etc" constant attention seeking that other breeds have.

[smurfette]

I forgot to mention that bonding coexists with experiences. The more you experience together, the more your hound will bond with you. It just needs time and patience.

[CharlieRhea]

I always tell "my" adoptants to imagine what it would like to be if I grabbed them, put them on a spaceplane and left them on mars. So, this is your new home. Have fun.

 

Your grey may be living with you but his personality needs a little more time to arrive. One of my boys needed almost two years and all of us moving to a new home to learn to trust me or even come to me on his own. Don't get me wrong, I love all of them like crazy, but when Andy climbs the couch for a cuddle - that are the most special moments for me.

agreed-takes time to trust in a new environment. Charlie was afraid of the world, he is now one of the most affectionate dogs i've ever had.

 

edited to add-he has been with us a little over 3 yrs. i dont recall how long it took but i had the good fortune of knowing him and him knowing me when i worked at the Greyhound Shelter locally. Day one i recall it took almost 20 minutes to coax him into the house.

Edited July 17, 2015 by CharlieRhea

[WalterWallerson]

I have 2 boys. Walter I've had for 4 years, it took him about 6 months but I also did EVERYTHING with him. Ernie, I've had for a year. I think it took about 6-7 months. This was tested when he accidentally became unleashed on our walk and I managed to get him to come straight back to me. Walter is very aloof unless food is involved. Ernie demands snuggles and kisses and loves everyone he's ever met.

[RedHead]

Mine was very similar. He took at least 6 months to a year to start bonding and showing me affection. He is almost 8 and still seems to grow each year in personality. A lot of greys do have an aloof personality though, I know mine will never be a friendly lab type.

[muddgirl]

I swear, Buffy did nothing for the first 3 months in our house but pace and eat. I never caught her sleeping. She spent the next 3 months watching us warily from the couch.

 

It's been several years and she's still not the prototypical "velcro dog." More often than not she will want to nap in the darkest, quietest, loneliest place in the house and does not follow me from room to room unless she suspects food is forthcoming. But she will demand petting (and then pretend she doesn't like it), engage in a hearty game of sharkface, and very rarely deign to snuggle up adjacent to a person (especially if she suspects treats are forthcoming).

[Feisty49]

One thing to remember is that racers are often moved from one race track to another. Your boy could be holding back waiting for the next road trip to a new place thinking why bother to get attached.

 

I adopted Annie four years ago yesterday. She doesn't often exhibit "I LOVE YOU" behavior, though she gets very excited (for her) when we're walking and she sees people. She loves up on them, friend or stranger, as if she's trying to sell herself for a new forever home. It could bother me if I didn't know that she considers me her pack, so to speak. She knows I am her human, but it took a few months for her to show how she knew she was in her forever home. She shows it mostly by getting very worried -- whining, running back and forth, trying to get to me -- if she thinks I'm leaving her somewhere. She shows it by watching me as I move around the house, if we're on the same floor. She shows it by seeking me out when there is thunder or fireworks and burying her head between my knees while I massage her shoulders.

 

She's almost 8 years old so I assume her personality traits are what they are, though I need to remember that Greyhounds surprise us by continuing to morph. She'll never be a velcro dog. She'll never get on the bed to cuddle. She does occasionally seek me out for some lovin' but most of the time I seek her out to give her love and pets. I live in a split level and it used to be she always had to be on the floor that I was on. No more, and she often goes up to the bedroom level for hours while I'm two floors below in the family room. I've kiddingly threatened her that I'm going to get another dog so I have a companion.

 

I suggest talking to your boy a lot, at home and when walking, and using his name all the time. Instead of asking, "Want a treat?" ask, "[insert name] do you want a treat?" Also, love up on him by petting and brushing and touching as much as you can and he likes. I get down on the floor with Annie a couple of times a day to scratch her belly. I brush her a couple of times a day. I massage her shoulders a couple of times a day. If she's awake, I never pass her by without touching her gently on her head or tickling her toes. (hmmmm... maybe she doesn't approach me much for lovin' because I'm at her a lot.. LOL).

 

So we need pictures and need to know his name.

 

Good luck. He'll come around eventually as much as he's going to.

[PatricksMom]

Patrick, about a month until I felt we both really bonded although he was happy and affectionate from the get-go, he was my heart dog and while I love each and every animal that I've shared my life with, I'm doubt I'll ever have that close a relationship again.

 

Henry, about a year or so with me, although much of that was my fault, I I adopted too soon after losing Patrick. He bonded with DH probably in a couple of months, but DH was more ready than I was. He's still not a super affectionate greyhound, particularly during the day--he does insist on kissing me goodnight and sleeping at the end of my bed--and I doubt that ever will change, but he seems very happy with his life. He's an introvert, he needs several hours a day alone in a room without us or Leo to be happy, I'm an introvert, so I can understand that.

 

Murphy, maybe a day on his side, about 5 minutes on mine and I was in love, he was never quite as close to DH although they did bond quite well and fairly quickly. But he was a double bounce from horrific conditions living outside. He and I did bound very closely, but I think he would have warmed up pretty quickly to anyone who let him live inside, fed him, and generally was kind to him. It wasn't until the first thunderstorm when he got to stay inside, lying on my lap, that I think he finally realized he was actually going to be permanently safe.

 

Leo, well, the first time I met him at a M&G, he crawled unprompted into my lap and gave me a kiss bordering on obscene, I wasn't even looking to adopt, just socializing my existing dogs. He's a love bug and an aggressive cuddler, but I also think his anxiety disorder bonded him more quickly to DH and I because he sees us as keeping him safe and reassuring him. He did take probably a month or so to start roaching and for his personality to start emerging, but I think again, that was because we needed to learn to understand his anxiety problems and start working on them productively.

 

Every greyhound is different, both in temperment and in the experiences they've had before coming to you. Finding ways to interact they enjoy is good, pushing for affection or to get them to play if they don't want to and what not I think can make things worse. About your hound, Henry basically ignored me for anyone else, including DH, for months, even now, he doesn't have Leo's need to check back in with us when he's getting attention from a stranger. And don't forget, in some ways, you're living with a toddler: the new person, toy, place is always going to be more exciting than whatever they're used to for a lot of them, that doesn't mean they don't like you or are unhappy with their life in your home.

[racindog]

You don't even see their true beautiful personalities sometimes for 6 months- a year- if not more. It has taken a year or more to really really reach the point where our hearts meld together with some hounds. Others are faster. But give it TIME and don't worry. They have a lot of adjusting to do. Enjoy watching him grow and learn- the day you're looking for WILL come and you will remember these present times fondly.

[Guest DarkHorse]

Araley was pretty quick - within a couple weeks she had taken her rightful place as princess. But she was never an overly affectionate or velcro-y dog; she expected us to come to her in order to worship her as was her due.

 

Dexter took about six months to settle in and really feel a part of the family. Since then, he's almost always been glued to someone's side. He loves his snuggles and his attention.

 

Both of them would/will pay more attention to strangers on walks than they usually did/do to us. I think a lot of it is the excitement of something new. At the end of the day, a couple of clicks of the tongue and a light tug on the leash is all that's needed to get moving again, and I'm OK with that.

[TXRedbo]

One thing to remember is that racers are often moved from one race track to another. Your boy could be holding back waiting for the next road trip to a new place thinking why bother to get attached.

 

I adopted Annie four years ago yesterday. She doesn't often exhibit "I LOVE YOU" behavior, though she gets very excited (for her) when we're walking and she sees people. She loves up on them, friend or stranger, as if she's trying to sell herself for a new forever home. It could bother me if I didn't know that she considers me her pack, so to speak. She knows I am her human, but it took a few months for her to show how she knew she was in her forever home. She shows it mostly by getting very worried -- whining, running back and forth, trying to get to me -- if she thinks I'm leaving her somewhere. She shows it by watching me as I move around the house, if we're on the same floor. She shows it by seeking me out when there is thunder or fireworks and burying her head between my knees while I massage her shoulders.

 

She's almost 8 years old so I assume her personality traits are what they are, though I need to remember that Greyhounds surprise us by continuing to morph. She'll never be a velcro dog. She'll never get on the bed to cuddle. She does occasionally seek me out for some lovin' but most of the time I seek her out to give her love and pets. I live in a split level and it used to be she always had to be on the floor that I was on. No more, and she often goes up to the bedroom level for hours while I'm two floors below in the family room. I've kiddingly threatened her that I'm going to get another dog so I have a companion.

 

I suggest talking to your boy a lot, at home and when walking, and using his name all the time. Instead of asking, "Want a treat?" ask, "[insert name] do you want a treat?" Also, love up on him by petting and brushing and touching as much as you can and he likes. I get down on the floor with Annie a couple of times a day to scratch her belly. I brush her a couple of times a day. I massage her shoulders a couple of times a day. If she's awake, I never pass her by without touching her gently on her head or tickling her toes. (hmmmm... maybe she doesn't approach me much for lovin' because I'm at her a lot.. LOL).

 

So we need pictures and need to know his name.

 

Good luck. He'll come around eventually as much as he's going to.

 

The bolded statement above exactly describes Redbo. We've had him for 3 months, and we can tell he's bonded to us (especially to my husband), but he is not the dog that jumps on your lap or wants to snuggle on the couch or bed. He never gives us kisses but he will kiss the vet all dang day, and he's in love with our neighbor in ways he will never love us. He doesn't even sleep in our bedroom at night.

 

But we are his "people." When I get ready in the morning, he will start whining and blocking the front door. When papa is gone, and it's just the two of us, he'll sit on the floor next to the couch and look at me for 30 minutes (kind of unnerving but whatever). When my husband wakes up and walks to the living room, Redbo will roach in welcome and wag his tail.

 

Redbo's real personality has started coming through in the last 2 weeks. Before that, I would swear he was half-dead; all he did was sleep and eat, but now, he's a little more comfortable and acts like a silly monkey most of the time. It takes time and patience and love, but eventually all (most?) dogs will bond with their humans. It's hard to be patient, I know, because we love them so quickly and so much, and we just want them to love us back!

 

Edited to add: I don't even think I would call Redbo loyal at this point . He does have SA, but only because he doesn't like being alone. We've had friends come over to care for him while we go out for date nights, and he is over the moon with them. Roaching and licking and everything. He would leave us in a second.

Edited July 17, 2015 by TXRedbo

[turbotaina]

...

 

When she came to us I started just giving her lots of pats, but she just stands there, as if she has been trained to stand on the spot emotionless. I started thinking that maybe she was just there because of training and not because of actual enjoyment, so I started training her to slightly nudge my hand with her nose to indicate that she wanted me to continue. Now, when she does that I feel I know that she is wanting contact with me. It does feel weird though, given that I LOVE dogs and feel like we have adopted a stuck up cat!

 

 

I call that "standing at me". Both mine do it and they do it because they want petting. If I stop petting, they give me insulted looks and wander off Mine also love other people and are beside themselves when we have visitors. It's the novelty though, so I don't take it personally. They also love new people on walks

 

For my first greyhound, I was the person to pull him off the hauler and I fell in love with him then and there. I adopted him 6 weeks later, but honestly, it took months for us to actually bond - and he was an outgoing, very sweet boy. Within a year though he was my best buddy whom I took everywhere with me and we had all sorts of adventures. I still miss him very much, and he's been gone 4 years now

 

With Heyokha - he bonded pretty quickly with my husband because they are at home together all day. He was a difficult pup and we had serious issues with the cats, too. So it took a long time for me to bond with him and him to bond with me (though he thoroughly enjoyed the sheath flushing I had to give him when we first adopted and would follow me around the house wagging afterwards ). He's still a total nutjob, but I love him anyway. And since his recent illness, he shadows me around the house and has to be in the same room as me all the time.

 

Crow was just easy. Everyone just falls in love with him immediately. And he loves everyone. He's just a super sweet cuddlebug and fit in our household on day 1. Heyokha took longer to adapt to his presence though, and still gets jealous.

[greytpups]

I haven`t read all of the responses, but all of our greyhounds (4) had or have different personalities and only one comes over and gives kisses and waits for you to pet her. Our male loves to have his head rubbed though.

 

We adopted a female in August 2013 and she has just started to come over to be petted, but it is still infrequent. I admit, sometimes I attach human emotions to her and wonder if she`s happy. But then I regain my senses and just accept her as preferring her own pillow and doesn`t have a need for people hanging all over her. All of our greyhounds allow us to lay down beside them on their bed and pet them and never show signs of anxiety. I guess they love to be petted, but don`t need to seek it out. However, they are the best greeters when we return home

 

I don`t think aloofness is uncommon in greyhounds, but I haven`t read any scientific research other than they were bred as hunters. I have seen as many aloof greyhounds as I have cuddlebugs.

 

I agree, 6 weeks is not very long and I imagine his personality will continue to evolve over time.

[Guest KEW]

Thank you to everybody who has had such helpful tips for us! To answer some of your questions, our boy's name is Mangia (Italian for "to eat") and he does love to eat! He's a big, brindle guy who weighs in at about 80 lbs.

 

I think that he's bonding more with us than we originally thought after we read your comments. He approaches us for pets (in fact, that's what he's doing right now) and he periodically cockroaches for belly pets in particular. I think I may have taken it too personally that he absolutely loves other people and doesn't display the same enthusiasm for us.

 

Yesterday, we took him to a dog park to socialize him a little bit more and he ended up following another person around. He loved on her so much that she even made the comment that he may have been a reincarnation of her former dog. I guess you never know! We will keep giving him time and love and try not to take it personally anymore when he goes nuts for other people.

 

Thanks again, everybody!

[Guest Greyt_dog_lover]

I explain to any potential adopter that the relationship with a greyhound is different than any other "dog" you have ever known. All pet dogs have been specifically bred for a particular purpose, but in allmost all cases, they have also been bred to instinctualy want to please their human. Greyhounds have not been bred with that intention. They have been bred to be independent thinking hunting dogs, not pets. As such they will not have that innate desire to please a human. You must build trust and a bond will ensue. The greyhound makes a conscious choice to be your companion, much like a cat. The racing greyhound is not bred to be a pet, and therefor you shouldn't feel slighted if they don't immediately bond. Relax and it will come with time.

[TXRedbo]

...I think I may have taken it too personally that he absolutely loves other people and doesn't display the same enthusiasm for us.

 

If my hound had his choice, he would immediately go live with our neighbor, he loves her so much. When he sees her he runs to her and buries his head in her lap (ask if he ever does that to us). Once, he saw her from across the parking lot as she was relaxing by the pool (darn those sighthounds), and he almost yanked my arm off so that he could go love on her. I like to say it was because he saw her in her swimsuit lol.

 

Like someone else said, it's probably because those other people are new and different.

[Feisty49]

Thank you to everybody who has had such helpful tips for us! To answer some of your questions, our boy's name is Mangia (Italian for "to eat") and he does love to eat! He's a big, brindle guy who weighs in at about 80 lbs.

 

I think that he's bonding more with us than we originally thought after we read your comments. He approaches us for pets (in fact, that's what he's doing right now) and he periodically cockroaches for belly pets in particular. I think I may have taken it too personally that he absolutely loves other people and doesn't display the same enthusiasm for us.

 

Yesterday, we took him to a dog park to socialize him a little bit more and he ended up following another person around. He loved on her so much that she even made the comment that he may have been a reincarnation of her former dog. I guess you never know! We will keep giving him time and love and try not to take it personally anymore when he goes nuts for other people.

 

Thanks again, everybody!

 

When I used to take Annie to a dog park (don't do it any more), she ignored the dogs but walked up to a human and stood there until they pet her. When they stopped, she moved on to the next one. Most people marveled at how she preferred people over dogs.

[Hubcitypam]

 

When I used to take Annie to a dog park (don't do it any more), she ignored the dogs but walked up to a human and stood there until they pet her. When they stopped, she moved on to the next one. Most people marveled at how she preferred people over dogs.

Buck did the same thing.

[PatricksMom]

Thank you to everybody who has had such helpful tips for us! To answer some of your questions, our boy's name is Mangia (Italian for "to eat") and he does love to eat! He's a big, brindle guy who weighs in at about 80 lbs.

 

I think that he's bonding more with us than we originally thought after we read your comments. He approaches us for pets (in fact, that's what he's doing right now) and he periodically cockroaches for belly pets in particular. I think I may have taken it too personally that he absolutely loves other people and doesn't display the same enthusiasm for us.

 

Yesterday, we took him to a dog park to socialize him a little bit more and he ended up following another person around. He loved on her so much that she even made the comment that he may have been a reincarnation of her former dog. I guess you never know! We will keep giving him time and love and try not to take it personally anymore when he goes nuts for other people.

 

Thanks again, everybody!

Mangia sounds like a happy, confident boy--roaching, asking for pets, approaching strangers with confidence, these are all really good signs.