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Sa Part 2 : Cries Incessantly When I'm Not Home But Dh Is

Guest Lisa_S

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Well the topic title says it all.

He works all day, I'm home (kids at school) so yes I'm her person, anchor, all of it.

But I took DD'd to TKD for 2 hours and she cried almost the whole time. DH wanted to run on the treadmill (in basement) and he couldn't b/c he'd out youngest DD (7.5 yrs) to bed & was afraid KJ would whine & wake DD. needless to say DH is feeling quite frustrated as this isn't the first time kj's been a whiner w/ him & I'm gone. What can he do? He's a patient guy but it's hard when she cries for me & he's trying to be good to her!


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I didn't read all your postings but

1. could she go down to the basement with him?

2. can you stop doing everything for your girl? Hubby can feed her, walk her, etc. for a while.


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You need to shift some of her care to him so she will bond with him. And even your kids, if they're old enough. If she is left in another room from the rest of the family when you leave, she shouldn't be. If you leave and there are family members present still in the house, she should be able to see them and interact with them. Many new greyhounds are what we call "velcro" dogs. They stick to their new people like velcro! And they can get agitated if left alone, and even more so if they know there are still people in the house.

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The dog is part of the family. Your child will survive if the dog wakes him or her up. Perhaps he or she could also start learning basic pet care?


The only way to work through SA is work through it. Your dog will learn that you WILL come back.


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Ok, I stand corrected. It's ok to allow a canine to wake up a child who needs to sleep. Duly noted.



I get that this is hard. I've lived in shared housing for all of the time that I have owned dogs. First my landlord lived upstairs, now we have a basement apartment below us in our rented house. I brought Kili to work with me for the first 4 months that I had her. I get that it sucks when a dog is being loud. My downstairs neighbour just adopted a little dog and she barks in her crate whenever he leaves. Sucks for me on Mondays when I'm off work, and if it's not under control in a few weeks will suck for DBF when he goes onto night shift. Used to stress me out when the dogs were new and getting used to being alone because I had neighbours and co-workers that they were disturbing. I just had to have the will power to say "I'm not caving". I'm not a mother but I understand that it must be hard to have your child be woken up. However, you need to think about it this way: you can deal with a couple of days to weeks of the dog crying and your child being woken up OR you can potentially be setting yourself up for MANY months to years with a dog who develops full blown separation anxiety. Then you have a dog that screams when left alone, destroys things, hurts herself, etc. Prevention is always going to be shorter, safer, and better in the long run. It's not necessarily easier short term, but you need to do it for a good outcome.

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I can't remember how long you have had your girl, but it really does take many months to a year or so for some dogs to really adjust to their new lives. In my Rudy's case, he had spent the first 4 years of his life in a completely and utterly different environment where he lived with many other dogs and had a training routine and a job to do. Then suddenly for the next year he was bounced around to the adoption agency, foster homes, placements who returned him, and so on. He has gone through many phases of settling in here over the past several months.


I'm not sure if you've read the Kathleen Gilley piece on greyhound life from their perspective, but it can really be enlightening I think: http://www.gpa-az.com/gilley.html


I think there are some things that will simply resolve over time as the dog really settles and gets used to her new life. Meanwhile it's a great idea to have the whole family provide for her, walk her, and work at forming bonds with her. But some behaviors you may have to just kind of grin and bear it and trust that with time and as her sense of security increases they will fade.

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