Are We Going To Damage Our New Arrival Who Has Separation Anxiety By U

[BatterseaBrindl]

 

 

 

This dog may not be the right fit for your family. There is no shame in realizing that some dogs just aren't right for some houses and lifestyles. If you have a dog with SA you will need to devote time to this and be able to have an adjustment period where the dog doesn't have to be home for long periods right away. It sounds like she is loosing her trust and developing more negative associations with all of the tools which are related to being alone. It will take a lot of work and time to get over and to earn her trust. Something to think about, if you are both stressed out it is not an ideal situation for anyone. I don't mean this as a bad thing or to make you feel bad, several people on this board have had to return dogs simply because their house wasn't a good fit. If you are really determined to work through this, definitely check up on the "alone training" on the board, lots of people have gone through the same thing.

 

 

 

Alone training takes TIME.

A lot of time....maybe more than you have if you're gone all day and then busy with the kids as well.

 

That said...if you're really dedicated you can do it. But everyone in your family MUST agree to do it.

Multiple times a day, every day.

For however long it takes. ... days or weeks.

 

Only things I'll add to robinw's and Giselle's sound advice above are:

 

1. Don't leave her behind a closed door. Yeah, bunch of people already said that. It's important. Most dogs don't like it and will freak out.

 

2. Anything you do when you're getting ready to leave, like putting her muzzle on ... practice when you're NOT getting ready to leave . If she's up on her feet, tell her "It's muzzle time," put her muzzle on, "Good girl!" and treat, leave it on for a couple minutes, take it off. Couple times a day. You want that activity to be just some weird thing the people do (and give her yummy treats for!) and not a certain indicator that "OMG, they're LEAVING me!!!"

 

Best luck. It has only been 3 days. Not all newly adopted dogs are unsettled for that period of time (plus a week or two), but many are.

 

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You sound like you're going to fast and expecting too much of her (and yourselves). SLOW DOWN. There are two other threads currently running in this section about two different greyhounds with the same problem as you - new dog and separation anxiety along with generalized anxious behavior towards everything else. Read them. The "shut down" you're experiencing with her is also very normal - she's overwhelmed and needs LOTS of time and patience.

 

Alone training takes time. You don't just toss her a treat and leave for 15 minutes right away. In your case, you need to start over and slow down. Decide on a routine that you will use every time you leave her. Then go through those steps, one at a time, repeating them until she is comfortable with each one. Pick up your keys, put them down and ignore her, pick up your keys, put them down and ignore her. Repeat until comfortable. Pick up your keys and walk to the door, walk back and set them down, ignore the dog - repeat, repeat, repeat. Pick up your keys, give her a chew treat or Kong, walk to the door, come back and sit down. You get the idea.

 

You might discuss with your vet getting some short term anti-anxiety meds.

 

If you really don't have the time or the inclination to give her the patience she needs, then consider returning her sooner rather than later. There is a better greyhound for your situation.

 

 

As well....

 

Not all dogs do well in crates.

We have two that were crated in previous homes before ours, and they did not do well.

Ruby chewed her way out, hurting herself and then destroying things in the house, and Nigel constantly messed in his.

 

We do muzzle the hounds if we're not going to be home. None of them are chewers, but the muzzles are a good 'safety' precaution against accidental nips.

 

 

Also

Patricia McConnell has an excellent booklet on Alone Training.

 

http://www.patriciamcconnell.com/store/I-ll-Be-Home-Soon.html

 

IMHO every new Greyhound owner should be given one to read before they take their new hound home.

 

 

As well...please read this article about Greyhound Life by Kathleen Gilley...it is quite long, but please, please read it...

 

 

Let us review a little. From weaning until you go away for schooling, at probably a year and a half, you eat, grow and run around with your siblings. When you go away to begin your racing career, you get your own "apartment," in a large housing development. No one is allowed in your bed but you, and when you are in there, no one can touch you, without plenty of warning.

Someone hears a vehicle drive up, or the kennel door being unlocked. The light switches are flipped on. The loud mouths in residence, and there always are some, begin to bark or howl. You are wide awake by the time the human opens your door to turn you out. A Greyhound has never been touched while he was asleep.

You eat when you are fed, usually on a strict schedule. No one asks if you are hungry or what you want to eat. You are never told not to eat any food within your reach. No one ever touches your bowl while you are eating. You are not to be disturbed because it is important you clean your plate.

You are not asked if you have to "go outside." You are placed in a turn out pen and it isn't long before you get the idea of what you are supposed to do while you are out there. Unless you really get out of hand, you may chase, rough house and put your feet on everyone and every thing else. The only humans you know are the "waiters" who feed you, and the "restroom attendants" who turn you out to go to the bathroom. Respect people? Surely you jest.

No one comes into or goes out of your kennel without your knowledge. You are all seeing; all knowing. There are no surprises, day in and day out. The only thing it is ever hoped you will do is win, place or show, and that you don't have much control over. It is in your blood, it is in your heart, it is in your fate-- or it is not.

And when it is not, then suddenly you are expected to be a civilized person in a fur coat. But people don't realize you may not even speak English. Some of you don't even know your names, because you didn't need to. You were not asked or told to do anything as an individual; you were always part of the "condo association”; the sorority or fraternity and everyone did everything together, as a group or pack. The only time you did anything as an individual is when you schooled or raced, and even then, You Were Not Alone.

In my "mobile abode," the Greyhounds each have several unique names, but they also have a single common name: it is Everybody. We continue to do things as a group, pack or as we are affectionately known in-house, by Kathleen's Husbandit, "The Thundering Herd."

Back to those who have not been permanently homed. Suddenly, he is expected to behave himself in places he's never been taught how to act. He is expected to take responsibility for saying when he needs to go outside, to come when he is called, not to get on some or all of the furniture, and to not eat food off counters and tables. He is dropped in a world that is not his, and totally without warning, at that.

Almost everything he does is wrong. Suddenly he is a minority. Now he is just a pet. He is unemployed, in a place where people expect him to know the rules and the schedule, even when there aren't any. (How many times have you heard someone say, "He won't tell me when he has to go out." What kind of schedule is that?) Have you heard the joke about the dog who says, "My name is No-No Bad Dog. What's yours?" To me that is not even funny.

All the protective barriers are gone. There is no more warning before something happens. There is no more strength in numbers. He wakes up with a monster human face two inches from his. (With some people's breath, this could scare Godzilla.) Why should he not, believe that this "someone," who has crept up on him, isn't going to eat him for lunch? (I really do have to ask you ladies to consider how you would react if someone you barely knew crawled up on you while you were asleep?) No, I will not ask for any male input.

Now he is left alone, for the first time in his life, in a strange place, with no idea of what will happen or how long it will be before someone comes to him again. If he is not crated, he may go though walls, windows or over fences, desperately seeking something familiar, something with which to reconnect his life. If he does get free, he will find the familiarity, within himself: the adrenaline high, the wind in his ears, the blood pulsing and racing though his heart once again--until he crashes into a car.

Often, the first contact with his new family is punishment, something he's never had before, something he doesn't understand now, especially in the middle of the rest of the chaos. And worst of all, what are the most common human reactions to misbehavior? We live in a violent society, where the answer to any irritation is a slap, punch, kick, whip, or rub your nose in it. Under these circumstances, sometimes I think any successful adoption is a miracle.

He is, in effect, expected to have all the manners of at least a six-year old child. But, how many of you would leave an unfamiliar six-year old human alone and loose in your home for hours at a time and not expect to find who knows what when you got back? Consider that if you did, you could be brought up on charges of child abuse, neglect and endangerment. Yet, people do this to Greyhounds and this is often the reason for so many returns.

How many dogs have been returned because they did not know how to tell the adoptor when they had to go out? How many for jumping on people, getting on furniture, counter surfing, separation anxiety, or defensive actions due to being startled or hurt (aka growling or biting)? So, let's understand: Sometimes it is the dog's "fault" he cannot fit in. He is not equipped with the social skills of a six-year old human. But you can help him.

Basically, adoption programs can be divided into two types. There are those who have access to their adoptees before placement and those who do not.

If you have access to your dogs before adoption, either through a holding kennel situation or foster home program, the behavior modification and training can begin at once and extend into the new home. If the adoption program is demand and supply, most of your counseling and advice will be done over the phone and through handouts. Now, remember, 50% of the world is illiterate and the other 50% can't remember what they read five minutes ago.

Both the dog and the new family must come to an agreement on the rules of the house. The problem on the human side, is they cannot be expected to know how to communicate what they like and do not like. Humans are extremely limited in their responses to distressing situations: curse it, beat it, kill it, nuke it or get rid of it.

All the things you do for these Greyhounds: the neutering, teeth cleaning, the worming, the tick panels, the collar and leash, the book--that's all real nice. (My first Greyhound didn't even have a rabies shot.) However, what John Q. Public wants is a dog who does not jump up on him or his family, leaves the food on the counter, walks on a lead, and does not growl when told to move over.

Is this too much to ask? From what I have gathered so far, the worst things often happen to a Greyhound after he is adopted.

Those of you with access to your dogs before placement could solve these problems before hand to a large extent. Both groups could offer humane solutions to fosters or owners when they do crop up.

An adoptable Greyhound must understand what discipline is--the cause and effect part. He must understand that certain behavior, like jumping on people is NEVER to be tolerated. To let the average human have first crack at disciplining a Greyhound, when they don't even know how to raise their own young, is foolhardy at best.

First the philosophy: Pain and fear teach distrust, alienation, and prevent bonding. A dog who runs from you cannot be disciplined until you have cornered him. At that point, he will wet his pants in fear or cause you pain before he thinks you will cause him some: flight or fight.

Our goal is to take the behavior we know he will never need, (which might endanger his life, like counter surfing), or that he finds rewarding, and we do not, and change the pay off, without pain or fear. We are permitted to aggravate, irritate, annoy, disturb, fluster, harass, startle, embarrass, distract, and pull a few rude surprises.

Teaching a Greyhound what discipline means, is the best tool you can equip him with for his new life. Then you must equip his family so they will pick up the squirt bottle and not the belt. Being a family pet is no easy job, but you can increase the odds of him not getting pink slipped.

Remember two things. Not all methods have the same effect. I cannot use the juice bottle on Chubby; she has never tasted something she didn't like. I cannot use the slightest neck scruff on Waco, because she cries big crocodile tears at the top of her lungs. Next, and most important: You must counsel your adoptees that these methods are not to be used by children. Children have no business disciplining anything. Some of these tools will give absolute power and you remember that absolute power corrupts absolutely. I have seen it turn even the mildest child into a raging tyrant.

I do have an opinion about humans, regardless of age, who receive punishment from a Greyhound. The ones who get bitten are the ones who break a Greyhound's rules. There is no such thing as an unprovoked bite from a sane, sound of body and temperament Greyhound.

Edited May 13, 2013 by BatterseaBrindl

[krissy]

I won't repeat all the great advice already given. What I will touch on is the "woe is me" attitude you are concerned about. I guess there are two main things to consider.

 

1) She's very new and she's overwhelmed. Most dogs that come right off the track keep to themselves for a little bit. They like to watch the goings on of the household and slowly start to interact more and more. The bolder the dog the shorter this time period, and the more timid the longer. We had a foster dog who came to us straight from the track. He was a pretty confident fellow but we had some crying in the crate for the first week and very little personality for the first couple of days. He slowly evolved to be a confident, friendly guy by the end of our 3 weeks together. And I know he continued to evolve in his forever home. Even our first dog, Summit, had a settling in period. He had a home for 2.5 years before us. He knew about homes and pet living and it STILL took about 6 months for his full, permanent personality to unfold itself to us.

 

2) "Permanent woe-face" I believe is the technical term for greyhound expression. To me it is VERY obvious when my dogs are happy. However, EVERYONE (even friends who know my dogs well) comment on how sad they look ALL the time. One friend the other day said that Summit looked like Eeyore. To which I remarked "that's his happy face, don't you know?". Like I said... permanent woe-face.

[Guest RMarie]

2) "Permanent woe-face" I believe is the technical term for greyhound expression. To me it is VERY obvious when my dogs are happy. However, EVERYONE (even friends who know my dogs well) comment on how sad they look ALL the time. One friend the other day said that Summit looked like Eeyore. To which I remarked "that's his happy face, don't you know?". Like I said... permanent woe-face.

This! James is super friendly and pretty much bomb-proof, but we still get told that he looks sad, that's he's too mellow (is that bad?!?!). He's a sighthound!

 

I know you're overwhelmed and I'm not trying to make you feel worse, but in one of your posts you state that you've been in the racing world for 20 years and that you're comfortable around greyhounds. So, I'm a bit surprised that you're upset about the woe face. That's the way sighthounds are. I feel like you should know that. Perhaps you thought by bringing one home it would have that happy-faced expression common to retrievers? She won't look like that, particularly right now when she's freaked out of her mind, but that doesn't mean she won't ever be happy at your home. Take in all this good advice that you've been given. Things CAN get better.

[Guest barnsleyfan]

Thanks for all the advice. The chewing of window sill doesnt bother me too much - it can be repaired and we would have similar problems with a pup, although we did spend £10k on new kitchen units recently!. I have another post going as well about the dog in general so i wont repeat everything here. We let her sleep upstairs last night on the landing which was uneventful. No crying or scratching, which is good. When wife has to leave house today (10 minutes to collect son from bus stop) she will leave kitchen door open so she has freedom of kitchen, stairs and landing, but there will still be the boundaries of the front door, living room door and bedroom doors (of which during the night on was open and we slept behind, which may be confusing).

[Hawthorn]

It's too soon to be leaving her at all IMO but if you're determined to do so, please warn your wife to be extremely careful on returning to the house as in her highly stressed state your dog will be an escape risk. Obviously I don't know the layout of your house, but if your wife will be returning through the front door, and you have a front garden with no or low gate, then this is an especially high risk. If this is the case, it would be best to go in through the back door if possible. Many newly-adopted greyhounds are lost in this way by new / inexperienced owners.

Edited May 14, 2013 by Hawthorn