Toddler Problems... Advice Greatly Appreciated

[Guest djutila]

Hi, this is my first post on here because I really dont know where to turn for this question. I have had my two greyhounds for over 3 years! I love them to death! and I have a one year old daughter... I think you know where this is going. my daughter is a very high energy toddler. I think I am going to be one of the parents that will have to leash their kids. And like all children, my daughter loves our dogs. she runs, she squeals, she wants to pet and pull things... My dogs are terrified! my female has always been terrified of everything around her, even my husband... she runs from her immediately, and has only nipped at her a couple of times because she was afraid my daughter was getting too close, but wasnt close to actually bite her. My male greyhound is much different, he doesnt move but I can tell he is very uncomfortable whenever she is around. He has nipped at her and almost got my daughters face, so you can see why i am very worried. we have tried positive reinforcement. You could hold a big juicy steak, and my female would not approach my daughter, and my male tends to get a little food aggressive when you throw food in the mix. has anyone had this experience? should I try something new?? right now I have to baby gate my greys in our bedroom when we are in the living room and visa versa. They HATE it! they whine and scratch... I dont blame them and I feel horrible about it... it feels like we are shutting them out of our family time and I do not want that. also when they run from the baby they have tipped her over trying to get away from her. I understand their fear. she is very unpredicatable. any advice would be appreciated.

[Brandiandwe]

Maybe I'm wrong, but it seems to me that you might need to accept and respect your greys' feelings here and, instead of focussing on their behaviour, focus instead on your daughter by making the dogs either less attractive or less accessible. But I don't have children so I might be way off.

[GeorgeofNE]

I also don't have kids, but the responsibility to keep your little girl AWAY from the dogs is yours. Obviously she's too young to understand a whole bunch of instructions and rules, and your dogs are...dogs. Right now she's making them uncomfortable, so you have to just make sure she leaves them alone.

 

I'm sure it's very difficult to be there all the time, but if you can't be, then the dogs need to be physically separated from her to avoid "nips" turning tragic.

 

I think there's a recommended book--something about Childproofing Your Dog? You might Google that.

 

My parents had dogs before they had kids (sounds like you did too) but they were fortunate that the dog we grew up with, Sam, was a 100% bomb proof English Setter. We could have done anything to dear Sam, and the worst he would have done is get up and walk away. Since many Greyhounds don't grow up around children, it seems like some of them just don't do too well with them when they're little, so you'll have to work out a way to get through this phase, and baby gates are your friends!

[Guest Downtownhoundz]

My boy is TERRIFIED of kids and people in general. I do however have my daughter and liddle granddaughter who is 13 months old that live here with me for the time being. He LOVES her and she loves him! We usually hold her and tell her to do "nice" as we show her how to pet him.She is the only kid that he isn't afraid of. Maybe if you hold her around them and talk to her and say do nice and then show her? We started this with her early on.

[Guest djutila]

Right now we baby gate the dogs in my bedroom because my daughter can practically run now... Our cat is great with our daughter and we have been teaching her "gentle pets" but every once and a while she will get a fist full of hair. Poor cat! The dogs have stayed away from her since she came home from the hospital. And when we tried holding her in front of them to smell they just in ignored her. But now that she can walk and chases them its a whole new ball game. I'm a new mommy but I can assure people I do not leave my daughter unsupervised. She likes to test boundaries...

[revamp]

I have kids.

 

It sucks to have to separate the dogs into different areas, but that's what you need to do right now. You're doing the right thing. The good news is, kids develop and grow so quickly that this situation will not last forever--I promise.

 

Right now it's important to protect your dogs from your toddler, so then as your daughter turns 2 and 3 and begins to develop impulse control and will respond to your rules and corrections, the dogs can be re-integrated and everyone will get a fresh start vs the dogs being traumatized.

 

It makes you feel worse than anything to see the dogs whining behind a gate, but they'll get used to it and get over it. Your daughter still takes at least one nap a day, I'm guessing, plus goes to bed early so there is plenty of time for the dogs to have the run of the house.

[BootsyCollins]

I have kids also. My older son is 4 and my younger son is an infant. I second everything Amanda said. And stay with your daughter constantly, always reminding her the right way to be around dogs. For example, dogs should be "no touch" when they are lying down or eating.

[Guest mld]

What about an x-pen for the dogs, something that will keep her out of their space.

[Guest djutila]

Thank you so much for your replies! I know it will get better once my daughter understands better. I just needed some encouraging words. It's hard to seperate family members

[Feisty49]

. . . My dogs are terrified! my female has always been terrified of everything around her, even my husband... she runs from her immediately, and has only nipped at her a couple of times because she was afraid my daughter was getting too close, but wasnt close to actually bite her. My male greyhound is much different, he doesnt move but I can tell he is very uncomfortable whenever she is around. He has nipped at her and almost got my daughters face, so you can see why i am very worried. we have tried positive reinforcement. You could hold a big juicy steak, and my female would not approach my daughter, and my male tends to get a little food aggressive when you throw food in the mix. has anyone had this experience? should I try something new?? right now I have to baby gate my greys in our bedroom when we are in the living room and visa versa. They HATE it! they whine and scratch... I dont blame them and I feel horrible about it... it feels like we are shutting them out of our family time and I do not want that. also when they run from the baby they have tipped her over trying to get away from her. I understand their fear. she is very unpredicatable. any advice would be appreciated.

 

I've had a child and I've had a dog, but not at the same time. While you need to protect your houndies from your toddler (and as tiring as this age is, it's also one of the best, IMO), I was greatly concerned to read about the nipping. We love our dogs and hate to separate them and make them unhappy but honestly, protecting your child is your #1 priority. I know you know that, but don't let your love and feelings for your pups get in the way -- ever.

[Guest mld]

This is a wonderful age, I loved it so much. My daughter was walking or should I say running at age 8 months and climbing out of crib at 11 months. And Yes, I had a harness for her, she was tiny and speedy. I used to call her Houdini because she could escape out of everything except the back closing types of harnesses. Keep her close by to you and the dogs safely gated off. Also If she is anything like my daughter was, invest in those high top of door safety latches so she doesn't escape in that split second you are doing something or sleeping. Good luck

[BatterseaBrindl]

I have kids.

 

It sucks to have to separate the dogs into different areas, but that's what you need to do right now. You're doing the right thing. The good news is, kids develop and grow so quickly that this situation will not last forever--I promise.

 

Right now it's important to protect your dogs from your toddler, so then as your daughter turns 2 and 3 and begins to develop impulse control and will respond to your rules and corrections, the dogs can be re-integrated and everyone will get a fresh start vs the dogs being traumatized.

 

It makes you feel worse than anything to see the dogs whining behind a gate, but they'll get used to it and get over it. Your daughter still takes at least one nap a day, I'm guessing, plus goes to bed early so there is plenty of time for the dogs to have the run of the house.

 

 

Your daughter will learn to respect the dogs and stay out of their space, but right now... and for another year or two..it is YOUR job to keep both the child and the dogs safe.

 

And that means keeping them apart.

 

Can you muzzle the hounds??

 

 

[gracegirl]

I was going to suggest a muzzle too...though I would still keep the hounds separated from your little one most of the time.

[racindog]

Ya'll attack me for being insensitive but I think the kids should be taught to leave the dogs alone. I wouldn't want the kids running at me and bothering me either. BTW my kid grew up around MANY dogs and is now a dog trainer and dog daycare owner. I taught him how to live with dogs and you'd better believe boisterous messing with them was not allowed.

[revamp]

Ya'll attack me for being insensitive but I think the kids should be taught to leave the dogs alone. I wouldn't want the kids running at me and bothering me either. BTW my kid grew up around MANY dogs and is now a dog trainer and dog daycare owner. I taught him how to live with dogs and you'd better believe boisterous messing with them was not allowed.

 

I think you've got a whole thread of parents eagerly awaiting your wisdom on how you simply "teach" a 1 year old anything related to impulse control. I mean, who needs to baby-proof a house if anyone would have thought to just teach their baby to keep their hands out of power outlets and to not open kitchen cabinets, or to not pull themselves up via the television. Teaching is an ongoing process, but I think the best method to protecting a toddler and dogs is supervision and containment.

[Guest june]

What about an x-pen for the dogs, something that will keep her out of their space.

 

This!

[Guest FinnsMom]

Ya'll attack me for being insensitive but I think the kids should be taught to leave the dogs alone. I wouldn't want the kids running at me and bothering me either. BTW my kid grew up around MANY dogs and is now a dog trainer and dog daycare owner. I taught him how to live with dogs and you'd better believe boisterous messing with them was not allowed.

 

I think you've got a whole thread of parents eagerly awaiting your wisdom on how you simply "teach" a 1 year old anything related to impulse control. I mean, who needs to baby-proof a house if anyone would have thought to just teach their baby to keep their hands out of power outlets and to not open kitchen cabinets, or to not pull themselves up via the television. Teaching is an ongoing process, but I think the best method to protecting a toddler and dogs is supervision and containment.

 

The only baby-proofing I ever did was put those thing-a-ma-jigs in the power outlets. I had friends who went the extreme route and put everything up out of reach so they wouldn't have to bother teaching their child what was okay to do, which only equaled little hellions when taken out in public or over to our house because they then wanted to touch and grab everything. It got to the point that we wouldn't invite them over anymore because the visit was them running after the child, not fun or enjoyable in any way.

 

I never had problems with my kids mistreating animals because they were taught not too, and if that meant a hand slap if they were mean, then they got a hand slap. It doesn't take them long to get the idea that if they pull the dogs ear, their gonna get a spanking (we don't need to start a debate on spanking). LOL My kids are now 22 and 20, I also have a 6 year old who I did no baby proofing for either. Cleaning supplies (what little I use as most are now natural) are still stored under the sink, just like they were when I was growing up.

 

Edited to add: I guess the point I was trying to make is that if you take away (baby proof) everything, how are you supposed to teach a child what is appropriate to do and not do.

Edited November 19, 2012 by FinnsMom

[silverfish]

I feel for you, but I agree with the others that you must keep the dogs separated whenever you are not there to personally and closely supervise them. In this way, you will be right on the spot to keep reinforcing that 'gentle pets' message, and when you're not, neither the dogs or your daughter will be in any danger.

 

Most of the time, dogs that air snap and run away as fast as they can are not going to bite, but one day they may be pushed beyond the limit and - as you say - it's probably her face that will get injured. Often a child's face will be injured without the dog even intending to bite, because children don't react very quickly, or may fall towards the dog and an open dog mouth is full of hard, sharp cutting tools.

 

Don't risk it. The dogs will learn to adjust to their semi-confinement. Just make sure they're within sight and sound of what's going on, while at the same time are out of reach and can relax.

 

 

Edited to add: I guess the point I was trying to make is that if you take away (baby proof) everything, how are you supposed to teach a child what is appropriate to do and not do.

 

You're both right, and very wrong.

 

Yes, your child has to have the opportunity to learn, and to make their own mistakes. I hate that we've turned into a non-competition education system here in England because that does NOT prepare a child for competition in life, which is real, immediate, and continuous, and covers pretty much all aspects of what they do as young men and women.

 

But it's very easy to say 'all you have to do is ... ' when it comes to child-rearing. You will have different problems with your children than somebody else does with theirs, and your babies, toddlers and older children will think, and behave, differently to someone else's babies, toddlers and children, because actually, they're not blank slates or pieces of modelling clay.

 

I HAD to move things to a higher watermark as well as proofing the hazards because my kids were all over the place, all the time. and didn't even sleep much.

 

A little story to illustrate the differences:

 

When my first son was about eighteen months, we moved to a house where our neighbours had a two year old boy called John. John, however, was just one of those children who just did exactly as he was told, all the time. My neighbour didn't say a word, but one day she had my son round to play on his own and when I went to fetch him, she apologised for almost letting him harm himself. Her son John had had a broken radio to play with for the last year and it had never occurred to him to open the little door (battery compartment) to see what was in there. It was the first thing my son did, but unfortunately, the batteries were corroded and leaking. My neighbour was aghast that she'd let him get chemicals all over himself and his clothing.

 

Point is, some children have more curiosity and less regard for the rules than others - it's not even a question of how smart they are. There's nothing wrong with John's level of intelligence at all, it's just a different type.

 

And no, mine were not hellions when out. I certainly had to look out for them, but there was no making a nuisance of themselves in a public place like a shop or a church or a public park because if they did that, we dropped everything and just went straight home.

 

I have no clue why that worked at the dentist, but it did.

[Guest Yankeegreyhound]

I have kids.

 

It sucks to have to separate the dogs into different areas, but that's what you need to do right now. You're doing the right thing. The good news is, kids develop and grow so quickly that this situation will not last forever--I promise.

 

Right now it's important to protect your dogs from your toddler, so then as your daughter turns 2 and 3 and begins to develop impulse control and will respond to your rules and corrections, the dogs can be re-integrated and everyone will get a fresh start vs the dogs being traumatized.

 

It makes you feel worse than anything to see the dogs whining behind a gate, but they'll get used to it and get over it. Your daughter still takes at least one nap a day, I'm guessing, plus goes to bed early so there is plenty of time for the dogs to have the run of the house.

I have kids also. My older son is 4 and my younger son is an infant. I second everything Amanda said. And stay with your daughter constantly, always reminding her the right way to be around dogs. For example, dogs should be "no touch" when they are lying down or eating.

 

I agree with both of these posts. I have a 6 year old and 3 year old twins. This is just a stage and your daughter WILL grow out of it and learn to respct the dogs. For now, keep them seperate unless you are on top of them. There are some good books out there too like "Childproofing your dog".

[Guest greysmitten]

I have kids.

 

It sucks to have to separate the dogs into different areas, but that's what you need to do right now. You're doing the right thing. The good news is, kids develop and grow so quickly that this situation will not last forever--I promise.

 

Right now it's important to protect your dogs from your toddler, so then as your daughter turns 2 and 3 and begins to develop impulse control and will respond to your rules and corrections, the dogs can be re-integrated and everyone will get a fresh start vs the dogs being traumatized.

 

It makes you feel worse than anything to see the dogs whining behind a gate, but they'll get used to it and get over it. Your daughter still takes at least one nap a day, I'm guessing, plus goes to bed early so there is plenty of time for the dogs to have the run of the house.

I have kids also. My older son is 4 and my younger son is an infant. I second everything Amanda said. And stay with your daughter constantly, always reminding her the right way to be around dogs. For example, dogs should be "no touch" when they are lying down or eating.

 

I agree with both of these posts. I have a 6 year old and 3 year old twins. This is just a stage and your daughter WILL grow out of it and learn to respct the dogs. For now, keep them seperate unless you are on top of them. There are some good books out there too like "Childproofing your dog".

 

All of this. My verrrrry active 2 year old son seems to enjoy bugging my dog. We have to constantly monitor their interactions. Luckily, our girl is apt to running away or asking to go outside if the house of too noisy or active. She will also loudly bark at our son if he's being a bother. It's tough to watch them all the time, but this time period won't last forever.

 

We have a no exception rule for the kids, though. They are NEVER to touch the dog when she's eating or sleeping. Even we don't touch her when she's sleeping.

 

One more thing ... I frequently have my son fill Azi's bowl at mealtimes and she will sit for a treat when he asks her to. As much as it is my job to teach him to respect and care for her, it is also my job to teach the dog to respect my children as they do me!

[Guest 2dogs4cats]

I have 2 kids and I never "child proofed" anything in the house. I made sure they stayed away from outlets, ovens, etc. The key is to control the interactions at all times and they do learn a lot faster than I think they get credit for if you are consistent. Sometimes you keep them separate and sometimes you create positive interaction between the 2. At that young age, if an adult is not part of the interaction, the child and dog are separated. If you consistently create the trust bond between dog and child, they will both grow into the relationship. I think the earlier you do this, the better. You teach the child how to give nice pets and give the dog treats, etc. Every positive interaction strengthens the bond for both.

 

Both of my kids grow up having respect for the pets and now are both animal lovers!

[Guest sweetpea]

The most important thing is that she will grow out of it, so any separation you have to implement now will be temporary.

Control what you can, when you can; and separate when you can't.

 

Plus also, she's a girl, so it's even more temporary.

If Elsa (now 6) had taken as long to comprehend the notion of "DANGER" as Finn (almost 3) is taking;

well, I'm not sure any of us would have survived it.

 

Good luck!

Buzzy