I am just so sorry. There are so many here who are experiencing the same emotions as you are. By your description, it is apparent that he knew he was loved and he loved in return. He is not truly gone, but is safely tucked into your heart. Look around you and he will send you a sign that all is well. It is different for many, you just need to open your heart to the possibility. I hope that sounds okay, I don't mean for it to sound condenscending or rude. I have seen rainbows in strange placees after the death of a beloved pet and the vision instantly brought me comfort. May this happen to you.